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| Clever Girl... >> Myself >> Pearls of Wisdom >> Part 7 13 October 2001: title censored ;) ****'s one of those people who seems to think that just because you SAY something, you ARE it... but it's not that simple. It's all well and good to THINK of all the wonderful things you want to be and do... but if you never actually take action on them, only tell people you're going to... it all becomes a little hypocritical. 17 October 2001: If we met tomorrow for the very first time I don't feel any satisfaction from knowing that this amazing boy cares so much about me. Because that amazing boy isn't so amazing, he doesn't care so much about me, and to quote Shirley: "I just don't care anymore." ... And, as I often end these entries, a little something about ****. What was it I said to Liv the other night? "he's just the kind of boy that can make you go dizzy and lose your mind, such is his infinite beauty... it transcends physicaility... it reminds me of when I first met... back in the days when I actually had reason to love him..." 22 October 2001: You can use me if you want to... You truly are an amazing boy - Wonderboy #3, a star in the sky. |
| I sometimes ache inside at your beauty, I lose my mind at the knowledge that here you are, this wonderful, fabulous boy - the third one I've ever encountered. 28 October 2001: You said that I was naive... My heart aches, my whole body goes warm for no apparent reason. Pain, I guess. My eyes brim with tears, and yet, it seems I have no right to be mourning what is so clearly already gone. What was gone before I pressed the 'sent' button early Wednesday morning on ICQ. What may be his fault, what may be my fault, and I've turned too insane to even be able to tell you. 02 November 2001: Some casual light days, part of the furniture... Somehow the delusion feels better. Of COURSE it's still the same. Of course. I suspect Liv was right when she said it probably happened before I actually thought it did. Funny how it was **** who changed all that though, isn't it? It really is weird. I guess she should be proud. She managed to change someone's life, the person that he was. 03 November 2001: In the morning I wake up and in the night I sleep I think you need to keep the people who knew you in the past, or else you'll never really understand where you're going or where you came from. 03 November 2001: I was lost, you were found... In any case, Andrew's wrong. We don't have to wait until we finish uni to get on with our real lives. It's not a matter of waiting. These ARE our real lives. They start now. previous next back |