time: 3:02pm
listening to: "radio" rancid
soo....i havent written the last couple o'days cuz chantelle has been here and it wouldnta been very polite fer me to sit on my ass in front of the computer and rite journal entries......oh but now shes gone and i can tell u all about everything....oh joy oh bliss.....
FRIDAY: well lets see......friday started off fine.....i played volleyball fer a couple hrs.....then i came back at like 4:30 and started to get ready to go to the weekend concert in toronto cuz me phil and matt were sposed to leave at 6 cuz we had to meet my friend aaron at the eaton centre at 8.....now it only takes like an hr and a half to get to TO so i figured wed have lots of time......and i was rite.....at like 7:30 we were driving down the 401 just about to turn off onto younge st when all the sudden we hear this big crash.....and then the gas pedal stops working....holy fucking shit....matt is freaking out and were trying to get from the fast lane to the shoulder so we dont die....luckily we made it to the shoulder just b4 the car stopped working.......so ya.....matts pist cuz his car just broke and were all kinda freaked out cuz ya...we coulda easily died.....and well sitting on the side of the 401 isnt eggzactly the safest place to sit.....so luckily phil had his cell fone and we called the caa fer a tow truck and then matt called his parents (cuz they live in brampton which is only like 30 mins away) cuz the 3 of us arent all gonna fit in the tow truck.....so we sat there in the car on the side of the road fer about 30 mins.....me and phil tyring to calm matt down cuz he was really unimpressed.....so the tow truck shows up first...ya...matt went to talk to the guy and he ended up driving the 3 of us (me in the middle and phil on matts lap) to meet matts parents.....so we get there and then we get into matts car and we go back to brampton with matts parents we get his dads car and we head back to TO.....by this time its like 9:15 er so......were just a little late to meet aaron but luckily chantelles bus wasnt sposed to come in till like 10 so i figured we just catch up with them at the bus station and then wed go to the show....better late then never rite.....well chantelle called phils fone at like 10 and was like "umm where r u guys??".....so we picked up aaron and chantelle like 20 mins later and all was well.....until matt ran a red lite and we almost got hit by 2 cars.....ooops....but we didnt and then we went to the show and it was cool....the weekend had a drummer filling in and man was he hot!! so ya...concert was cool....it got done at like 12:45 er something and holy shit it was windy as a mother fucker when we got outside!! sitting at stop lites the car was shaking even with the 5 of us in it.....it was crazy...so anyway we dropped aaron off at his place and then we headed back to peterboro....even tho matt was just sposed to drive us back to his place in brampton......
but im gonna stop there fer now.....ill finish later.....i really have to do that essay thats due tomorrow....seeing as how i havent started it yet.....oops......and on a kirk tangent....he just came on icq and talked to me fer like 5 mins and then left cuz hes gotta get ready fer work.....weird....my inner child is telling me its just cuz he wanted to see if i was online.....but i dont want to be thinking that....argh.....im gonna fall fer him again and were gonna fuck and im gonna get hurt...but well at least ill get sex with him again..oh well.....im screwed up.....but i know that so its ok....tata
time: 9:24pm
listening to: meg and mir talk about how mirs gonna study (ya rite)hehehehehehe
so anyway.....ya.....the way back to peterboro.....ya.....well we found our way to the rite xit....it was like 25 ft from where we dropped aaron off.......we got on the 404 and were driving.....no big and all the sudden the car in front of us swerves and were all like "what the fuck??' and then we see one of those huge black and orange striped cone things blowing rite toward the front of the car....so ya we swerved and mist it...and then like 2 mins later we almost rearend a transport truck cuz he cut us off....bastard.....
lol.....i just banged on the wall cuz jawad and his friends were banging.....and someone said sorry.....hehehehe.....thatll so those bastards.....but back to the story.....
so anyway.....after that the drive back to peterboro was reasonably uneventful aside from the blinding icy snowy rainy stuff.....we were just about back to the university....driving down university road when we saw a cop car with its lites on ahead of us parked on the other side of the road......we were like "what the hell is he doing?" and then we ran into a tree....well just a big section of the tree that had fallen onto the road in the storm....now we all screamed and looked back and at the same time we ran into another big huge tree branch that was on the road....ya.....so we figured out what the cop was doing on the side of the road......and then we got back to the university and had to try and convince matt not to drive back home....someone ended up doing it......thank god......that boy is insane and has a death wish i sware! so then chantelle and miranda met......and it was cool.....mir really likes chantelle.....i knew she would cuz chantelle kix ass but mir was all worried and blah blah....but i was rite ahah...i alwayz am (ya rite)......so we all hung out in my room fer a bit and then we all hit the hay cuz we were all really pooched.......
SATURDAY: well lets see......i got up around oh 2 er 2:30......and chantelle was sitting on the floor doing hmwk....that girl....so anyway the 3 of met jeremy and went to the caf fer lunch.....we came back and mir went downtown with jeremy....but me and chantelle stayed behind cuz we had to get ready to go to the formal wooooo!! we ended up getting all ready and taking the 6:15 bus to the formal (dinner was sposed to start at 7).....well it didnt but that was ok....we had bread.....and wine and finally dinner was served....now me and chantelle and 3 other girls at the table ordered the vegetarian meal......and well none of us were impressed with what we got.....it was like 7 pieces of stir fried vegetables ontop of lentil beans.....blech......so i being the bitch that i am asked fer the chicken meal without the chicken....everybody else followed suit.....it was good....green beans and potatoes yummm......so anyway next up was dessert.....and a slide show....the dessert was really good....a crepe filled with ice cream with creme de mint and strawberries on the side....the slide show.....unfortunately....was a total pice of shite.....it was pictures of the same ppl over and over and over again and there were pictures from last yr so more than half of the ppl had no idea who the hell they were.......and then the idiots repeated like 10 pictures.....well the 3 glasses of wine i had had just werent enuff so off to the bar i went.......and about 4 or 5 or 6 cranberry and vodkas later i was having a fine time....so i danced to crappy music.....yeah.....and then i requested ruby soho and they played it......and u know whats fucking hilarious?? outta the 200 ppl that were at the formal me and laurie (my don) were the only ones on the dance floor....whatever......so then we ended up going to some shitty bar (the rooster) after cuz we had to wait fer the bar bus.....ya....by the time we got home it was like 1:30 and the buzz was pretty much gone......me and chantelle got outta our formal dresses showered and then went to bed.......fun fun
and now on to today......chantelle went home at like 1:45....we had to catch the bus at 1.....argh.....it was so cold......then i came home and pretty much did nothing all day.....besides eat...and ya....thats my day....but i now have a little over 400 words ritten fer my essay.......wooo....only 800 more to go.....blah....but it only took me like an hr to get that much so i figure i got lotza time.....ummm ya.....i like to procrastinate......thats me....and i hope i get to talk to kirk again tonite.....argh...stupid me.....stupid feelings....stupid sex drive....oh well....i want him....and sex from him.....i may as well get it while the gettins good eh?? well mir wants the puter.....tata fer now.....
time: 4:25am
listening to: "beautiful" joydrop
oh my god.....i just talked to kirk fer like an hr on icq....he told me that he still loves me....that he always did....i dont know what to think.....i mean this is what ive been waiting for since the day he broke up with me.....god i love him so much......and im crying now and i dont know why.....i just want to make him happy.....i dont know whats going to happen....but thats not really any different from any other day now is it? my god....he loves me...why am i crying?? at least now i mite have some happy entries eh?? lucky u...well lucky me....i dont know.....im really confused....i think im in shock....i dont know what to make of this....i just wish i could be with him rite now.......hold him in my arms again....kissing and stroking his hair and his face......have him fall asleep beside me....oh god....i hope with every last particle in my being that this doesnt come crashing down around me again.......and hell even if it does ill still love him anyway who am i trying to kid? he told me im his one and only....i know hes mine....ive always known.....from the first time i saw him.....like 3 years ago...i talked to him fer like 5 mins.....but i knew.....i felt it....and ive never felt like that fer anyone else ever again.....even when i thought he and i were thru fer good.....both times.....he is the one....i just dont want this to fall apart....whatever this is....i dont even know.....i dont want to lose him again....thats what scares me....maybe thats why im crying...i dont know how long this will last...i dont really think i believe that whole its better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all thing....i can only take so much.....