| It was late in the year 2001, when six young men were embarking on their journey of self-discovery and getting their lease signed. The students of James Madison University had secured an address: 70 Broad Street, Harrisonburg, Virginia. No, no. Needs a name. Batcave? Alpha Beta Monkey? Blahbedy blahbedy blah? No, this is a serious matter. We thought and thought. Jeff wants stuff. We agree. Not just stuff: free stuff. Corporate sponsorship. Evil empires squatting in our abode. Oh, but what means to this end? Electronic mail: mail sent electronically. The tech-heads call it E-Mail. We must have had pizza that night: Papa John's was our first solicitation. We waited anxiously the next morning for our electronic mailbox to fill with an enthusiastic reply. If it was to be, it was to be later. Papa John's said they would forward our mail to the "appropriate person". This was hard to stomach. We had worked so hard, just to be put through the guts of some pizza pie bureaucracy. Then realization happened. Many companies needed to be exposed to our radical views. Even ones we had no feelings for. No brand loyalty, no buyer history, no products we cared about. Luckily, electronic mail was a media easily sent in rapid slathers. They would take it, and they would enjoy it. Eat it! And then....like the wind...we started to get responses... "NO." was the basic reply. They tried to vary it, ranging anywhere from, "We do not accept unsolicited marketing ideas from external sources" to "We have our own advertising employees" to "Fruit of the Loom is in the process of emerging from Chapter 11 Bankruptcy." (Who knew?) A few complimented our deranged idea and our chutzpah, but still could not help us. We sent some snail mail to a select few companies, hoping those were more likely to be read. One of those recipients was Taco Bell, whose generosity came to us in the form of $4 in Border Bucks gift certificates. They were promptly used. In the end, though, over one hundred companies received our mass mailings, and about half responded, although none of them with the response we were looking for. Our initial request of monetary donations was scratched, and now we simply asked for merchandise. We were desperate. This whole project began in late November, and now it was December. It had been almost one month and we had no sponsor yet. It was the bridge between semesters, and we all went home with uncharacteristically long faces. No, my friends, this was not turning out to be a very merry Christmas. Then an angel appeared. Actually, she e-mailed us. Marie L. was her name, employee of Ansell Healthcare. Unaware of this parent company, I opened it warily. She identified Ansell as the parent of LifeStyles condoms. So I read on. As expected, she could not would not pay us cold hard cash. These marketing types are a smart bunch; no free lunch would be handed out to six punk kids. She did, however, have some extra t-shirts that could be jettisoned in our direction. We felt this was enough. The Sponsorship Era had begun. This fire spread between the six of us and whoever else cared to care. Some of these six firefighters kept the blaze from consuming Mt. St. Parents until absolutely necessary. There are probably some who still don't know. The packages arrived in February. Delivered to Dan's home, the two boxes had the return address of Ansell Healthcare, Dothan, Alabama. Dan hardly expected two fully-packed boxes. Inside, contained the most beautiful treasure he have ever seen mailed third-class. Much of this wonder came from the surprise of getting much more than was expected. Inside were 20 t-shirts, 5 posters, 144 condoms, 1 inflatable chair, and 1 wicked banner. The banner has to be returned when we move out, but that dampered no spirits. The spring semester of 2002 passed quickly, with visions of flavored condoms dancing in our heads. T-shirts were worn, condoms were blown up like balloons, a good time was had by all. To find out how this story ends, check out the book from your local library. The banner hangs proudly in our front window. The chair hangs above our stairwell, seating Tub Bunnie. The shirts are in our regular wardrobe rotation. The posters are up. The condoms are blown up like balloons. Now the six mighty warriors, Simon, Kevyn, Deek, Jeff, Spencer, and Dan look forward to a bright future for the LifeStyles House. |
| This site is not affiliated with LifeStyles or Ansell Healthcare, and all views expressed within this site are opinions of the webmasters. LifeStyles logos and all related marks are copyrights of Ansell Healthcare, Inc. |
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| The Story of 70 Broad Street |
| See all the companies we contacted and their responses Here. (Excel file) |
| Fun Fact: You can use AOL Instant Messenger to talk to us! Our Screen Name is "LifeStyles House". |
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