Posted by Julie on March 21, 1999 at 09:33:24 {MWoa9zs0COcKs}:
In Reply to: Realization posted by Rick on March 20, 1999 at 22:33:05:
Rick,
I am surprised at the tone of this post. Perception is reality though so I want to share something with you.
Two women, both very ill, dying in fact. One in her mansion and a lifetime of acquiring wealth and affluence under her belt. The other one of modest means in a pretty crappy public hospital, having been widowed many years ago and left with four small children.
I paid a deathbed visit to the one of means and watched her receive her visitors as though she had expected them to come. For their efforts they were rewarded with heart-wrenching scenes of self-pity and misery. Not only was she surrounded by her riches and three devoted children but a lot of people travelled great distances to see her. No word of thanks.
A week ago I went to see the one of meager means. Her children are devoted to her and were staying with her in shifts, out of necessity. My brother and I walked in and she was so grateful and surprised she wept instantly. It was obvious she was very ill but I wouldn't have known by her demeanor (which I'm sure took great effort on her part). We had a grand visit, she told stories of her father from Ireland and the years growing up (very, very poor but happy) in a house with 16 kids (she's my dad's sister). She got out of bed, put on a shabby robe and painfully moved around a bit (the nurses told her to). We left there so happy to have seen her I nearly cried.
I called her yesterday to see how she was and she thanked me repeatedly for having come to see her. She said she now knew how truly loved she was. (What until she gets the new robe I sent her!) :-)
It was amazing to see the differences in these two women and their behaviour. The first one expected so much that no matter what she had she wasn't happy. The second expected nothing and every little thing brought her great delight.
Perception is reality. You may want to re-think yours, life can be wonderful Rick and the world is not the awful place you have been led to believe it is. I think you're just under too much stress lately as you usually seem to be much more hopeful than this dark post indicates.
Concerned for you,
Julie