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When men hold off from marrying women, we call it fear of commitment.
-- Warren Farrell (American Psychologist)
Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her
think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.
-- Lyndon B. Johnson
God made man before woman to give him time to think
of an answer for her first question.
-- Anonymous
I'm never wrong. I once thought I was wrong, turns out, I was mistaken.
-Unknown
No one will win the battle of the sexes, there is too much flirting with the enemy
-Henry Kissinger
I was born intelligent but education ruined me!
-Hiren Mehta
There is no such thing as a stupid question, just stupid people who ask questions.
-Unknown
Sometimes my mind wanders; other times it leaves completely.
-Unknown
Heck is where people go who don't believe in gosh
-Unknown
When I die, I want to die like my grandmother, who died peacefully in her sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in her car.
-Unknown
If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.
-Unknown
Stupidity: If it doesn't exist somewhere for you, then you are probably it.
-Kevin Hogue
I wasn't lost, it's just that no one could find me.
-Billy Connelly
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man."
-Lana Turner
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
-Unknown
When I have a kid, I'm going to go to the mall, put him into a double stroller, and run around looking frantic.
-Unknown
"If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."
George Gobol
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
Napoleon Bonaparte
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."
Robin Williams