Caught between two worlds...this is precisely how I feel after being home in the USA for the first week of my 2 week vacation from Mauritania. At times it feels like I am just home for a routine holiday visit from DC. Other times I feel as if I am a stranger in my own homeland.
Of course, it feels absolutely wonderful to see all of my friends and family, particularly reconnecting with lost acquaintances as well as making new ones. Yet, I can sense just how much I have changed over the course of the past 15 months. I have developed an amazing amount of patience for routine tasks which take ages to accomplish in Mauritania. Things like picking up the mail at the post office, waiting in long lines to pay bills, and being constantly harassed and followed by children and adults alike.
At the same time, I have lost all patience for listening to petty complaints, especially when we as Americans have so much for which to be thankful. Deciding which of 10 different routes to take when they all get you to the same place or how much to pay for a cell phone service plan...these are choices which seem both unnecessary and annoying. After all, in the grand scheme of things, who really cares? What we should think about is how to live peaceful lives so that we as a society can advance beyond the point of jealousy, hatred, genocide, exploitation, and never-ending war.
What has struck me the most since being back is just how much simpler life is in Mauritania. There really are not many choices to make given the lack of goods and services. No need to worry about choosing among 50 types of toilet paper--quilted, scented, or 2-ply. The choice really is whether to use or not to use. An easy choice if you ask me. Or deciding what to have for lunch. No choice at all as every day is the same as the one before and the one after. No movies to go to, no tv to watch, etc. Without these distractions, I have plenty of time to think about how much nicer it can be to be devoid of choices. Some might call this a tyranny or a dictatorship. Yet, there is some comfort in being freed of constantly having to think about such unimportant things.
With so much waste and excess in the US, I long to return to the stark reality of life in Mauritania. Having so few possessions and decisions makes me appreciate what I do have much more than I suspect many people in the US do. Who knows, maybe once I move back to the US I will fall back into that mindset of entitlement and selfishness. I certainly hope not.
Until next time,
Janine
