| MY DAYS |
| 6/21/04~ Well i thought it was time for a new page, i was tired of the dark one.... Once i lose my trust in someone it is really hard for me to get it back. When somone lies to you, and hurts you, in the back of your mind you still think that they are going to do it again. I don't like thinking like that, But i just can't help it! Oh well, i guess that is just something i will have to work on.. Dunno, what is going on..... Dang i don't want to take my tests this week, i am so sceeerrdddd......Austin is going to be gone all week, he is going with his grandparents to get his daddy, i am going to miss him. I get so bored and lonely when Austin is gone. I will have noone here to talk to and keep me safe...i feel safe with my little man here. I hate being away from him... Well i guess i better go and study... everyone needs to pray for me, i have to do good on these tests :( ..........Welp bye bye............ 6/22/04~I had a wonderful day, probably the best in a while....I am still smileing....My BF took me out to eat, bought me a helmet, then we went riden and went to the mall bought me a shirt. But ya know it isn't the stuff that he bought that made me so happy, it was the time i got to spend with him. And we didn't fuss, we just had a nice time. We could have done nothin and it still would have been wonderful. Days like this are far and few between, but when they do come around, i really enjoy them. Gosh, John you must have fell and hit your head...lol...Thank You!!! But one bad thing, i heard those dreadful words "Don't get used to this"...lol...i have heard that alot through my life...But ya know i am learning not to get used to things, one day at a time, I guess..well at least for now!! Well tomorrow is my test day and i am worried, but i will try my best, and hope that is good enough...lol..well i am gettin in bed early, i am so so tired...nighty...night...bye...bye... 6/24/24~HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!! I Love you! Well I thought that i got all F's on my tests, cause i totally froze, and freaked out. But i got C's on all of them, so that ain't to good but gosh it is better than an F.....WOW, My man is still being nice to me, this is kinda weird, don't get me wrong it is great, but it isn't normal...lol...I guess i will enjoy it while it lasts!!! And i just want to say one thing to a friend "Christy you are messing up big time". I am very worried about you!! Oh gosh i miss Austin so much, i can't even sleep, i want him to be back already.. :( ...I have been so sad!! I am going to go ahead and post on here for tomorrow, cause i won't have time, i will be very busy...So here it is.... 6/25/04~On this day last year, i was terrified, worried and sad, but also very happy at the same time. I was a single mother laying in a hospital bed waiting to have my new baby boy. The only people i had by my side was my best friend Misty and my dad, i will never forget how scared i was that day, but there was one person that came to see me and held my hand and told me that everything was going to be ok!! This person gave me the strength to make it through my fears that day. He isn;t with us today, but he made a big impression on me, and i will never forget him. His name was Mike Taylor. (He is my boyfriends dad) Mike passed away last year, but he lives on in the hearts of all those who knew him!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BOY AARON!! ONE YEAR OLD!!!!!! Your a wonderful baby, and I love you so so so so so much!!!!!!! Well it is bed time for me now...Nighty...Night....Bye............. 7/1/04~ Well i havn't been on my computer much lately, I have been doing pretty good though. Well until last night that is.... Me and my man have been doing really good for the past week. It was nice while it lasted...But i think that the good times are coming to an end, But i dunno for sure. Well my car is messed up it is over heating, i need 2 fans for it, which i can get, i just need a car man to put them on! I am starting to get very stressed out, my car is screwed, and i have one of my final exams next week, and i failed my psychology test, and Austin's dad has made me very mad. Austin has missed him so so much while he was gone, i thought for sure that for the 2 weeks that he is here, he would want to spend time with his son. But nope, he left and went on a vacation with his girlfriend, and he won't be back till the 5th and he leaves on the 9th, to his base in New York!! Oh well it is his loss...... What a total loser!!!! Sheww, i am gettin so sick of school, i think i needed a break!! I am in class right now and i hate it!! Well i guess i am going to go now....i love you john....bye...bye...later taters....( I hope that i have a wonderful weekend and i hope that everyone else does too, have fun and be careful!!!!) 7/6/04~ Ok, I have decided that, I have the most wonderful man in the world!! I am so happy with my relationship, right now. I just hope that things keep going well with us. My boyfriend got a new car, it is so nice, it is a 2004 cheverolet trail blazier. Very nice choice hunny... Well my medical term exam is wed, i am gettin alittle worried, cause it is going to be pretty hard. Gosh got alot of stuff to get done tomorrow. busy, busy, busy....Thank you John for lettin be borrow your car today, your gettin sweeter and sweeter everyday, gosh i have realized that i am very lucky to have you, and my kids are very lucky too, they love you alot!! Well gotta go later peoples......bye..bye.... 7/11/04~Wow, this has to be a record, I am still happy..Things are going great, well except for my crazy car, it is going to the shop for the 3rd time in one week, it is really driveing me crazy, well actually i guess it isn't driveing me at all...Oh yeah i got a B in medical terminology class, yea, i am happy about that....it was a pretty hard class......lol...My boyfriend is great, i am so in love...lol...i just can't help it, he is wonderful....It is weird, i have always been in love with him since we first got together, but just recently, i have felt something diffrent , something deeper, something good. i smile everytime i think about him...lol......Austin's dad has went back to the army, to his base in New York, he didn't spend really any time with Austin while he was here, it makes me so sad, i don't understand why some dads do this to there kids, it is sad!! But my boys have me and i will do all i can to make up for what is missing in there lives, i will try my best...Well i am going to take my happy but off to bed now, nighty..night...bye...bye.... 7/15/04~ Ok, my car is finally fixed, after almost $600 dollars later, but it is fixed...lol....Things are going ok with me right now, I just want things to work out and i want to settle down and be happy, is that to much to ask for...well yeah i think it is, but i will be ok... Someday things will slow down and stop being so hecktic...i can't wait...lol....The kids are doing good, and so is school, and i hope me and my man are doing good, it is hard to tell sometimes. But I tell ya this heat is killing me, shew, and no air conditioning in my car is really bad...but it won't be hot forever...when it is hot i want it to be cold and when it is cold i want it to be hot, can't make up my mind, tipikle woman for ya...lol....but ya can't live with out us, so deal with it!! lol...ha ha ha....well later taters...and I Love You JOHN!!!!!......Bye people!!!! Gosh things seem to be going back to the way they used to be, fussin and not gettin along, dangit, what the heck did i do wrong? Hum, i dunno...Oh well...stressin out alittle, but it is all good...... 7/20/04~Things are going very good, My bofriend is off work this week, which is great, We are all going to Gatlinburg tomorrow, for a few days, it is going to be nice to get away. I love being with my man spending time with him, i am actually happy....very happy.. He is looking for a house, so i dunno know how i feel about it, at first i was very excited, but then i started thinking about it and, i am not sure, i mean it would be great if i knew that he wanted me to stay with him. But it seems that he just wants to be alone, but i am not sure, i haven't got a definit answer, so i guess like i always say, only time will tell........ But for right now, i am very happy, and things are wonderful!! Well it is time for me to go to bed, Nighty Night...bye...bye..... 7/24/04~HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN!!!! I Love you hunny!!!!!! 25!!!!! 7/25/04~Ahhhh, I have had a great week, spent alot of time with my man and my kids, we went to Gatlinburg, we all had a good time, i really enjoyed it!! Thank you John for takeing us!!! And i am sorry for being a buthole yesterday!! But anyways, i haven't been on here much, i havn'tt really had time... But it seems that i am going to have alot of time for the next few weeks, until school starts, i am going to be bored.....Welp, my boyfriend has decided not to get a house, and that bothers me alittle bit, I thought that things were going to change for the better, but it seems that change isn't something that he wants. I think that he would just date me like we are and see me on weekends forever, if he could. Either that or i am still the chick to hang out with till the right one comes along... Me and my kids love this guy....we truely do!! Shewww, Misty i havn't talked to you in a few days, i think it is a record, i will call you later hun, oh and lets go to the gym together this week...I love you!! Well i gotta go...i am alittle down today....bye...bye.... 7/29/04~Welp, things with me are ok...i guess....not had a very good day, i wonna go to duke fest...lol..................................... .................whoooodoggggyyysss.....lol...ewwww ewwwwww..... you and me goin fishin in the dark, lien on our backs and countin the stars...... it feels so good to be with you!!! yep..yep....sorry i have lost my mind and i am bored... it just poped in my head....he he he....oh ok, well got Aarons pictures made today, shewww weee he screamed and cryed it was awful...poor little dude, he didn't like that lady at all...lol... Aaron is trying to walk, he is so cute....i loves my little angels... My man was not being very nice to me, i guess it was my fault, sometimes i talk before i think, and it gets me in trouble...but if you want a week with out me, then that is cool....but it makes me think, why would you say something like that, kidden or not.....hum....dunnno...well gotta get in bed now....bye...bye...night....night...... 8/4/04~ Gosh, i have had a very bad day, it was like one thing right after another. I had to take my mom to the hospital and deal with her in alot of pain, she had a pinched nerve in her neck, and then the Dr. comes in and tells her that she has diabetes, and that she needs to see a Dr. as soon as possible, but that is a problem she has no insurance. Sheww it is so ruff, i have alot to deal with i worry about my parents and there health and then i worry about my kids, school, money, and then on top of it all, i am not secure with my relationship, i have to worry were it is going,( which seems to be no where, after almost 2 years). I tell ya the stress will eat you alive!! I had such an bad day, me and my man fussed, it sucked i really don't like fussin with him, i just wish he understood how much he means to me and that i just want to feel that i am more than just a girl to be with for right now, cause that is really what i feel like. I am just someone to be with until he decides to settle down and find the right girl.... I tell ya just thinkin about that breaks my heart, my heart had been through way to much, i am not sure how much more it can take!!! It is weird how i know how i feel, but he seems to not know how he feels, gosh guys really confuse me, but i guess us girls confuse you guys too....lol....sorry to all those guys that i have confused...lol....but i tell ya we are all that way, so don't think you will leave one to go find one that doesn't confuse you and fuss and drive ya crazy, cause we all do it!!!!! ha ha ha ha......well it is time for bed...nighty...night....bye....bye.... 8/14/04~ Well things have been pretty good, my man has stayed with me alot lately, cause his mom went on vacation. It was really nice though, I could get used to it. But i know better, can't get used to things with him!! But it was great while it lasted.... Well school starts in 2 weeks, i am kinda glad, cause it will give me something to do. And i always seem to meet some new friends. I just want to say thanks to the people who read this and seem to actually care about me, your a sweetie...Well Aaron is completley walking now, he is even trying to run, it is so funny to see him walking now, he is so cute.. And Austin thinks it is great that Aaron can walk, they are so silly.... Well i just want to say "I Love You John" I know i give you a hard time sometimes< but i am so thankful to have you in my life, and my boys are lucky to have you. We would do anything for you and i hope that what we have lasts forever, but i will try to not get my hopes up on that one...lol...well peoples i better go now....gotta get outta here...bye....bye..... 8/18/04~Things are going pretty good for me right now.... Welp went to the Dr. today, i guess i am ok, i was having some weird problems with my leg, it was aceing and fallin asleep and going num on me, weird,, but she said i am ok...lol...so i guess i will take her word for it....Aaron had to go to the Dr yesterday and get a shot, poor little dude..But he is ok...lol...I've not felt to good today, but i am feelin better now. My man has spent alot of time with me, and i tell ya, it is great... But uh oh, i am kinda gettin used to it...lol...that ain't good...cause he always says don't get use to this....oppps....i guess i need to try alittle harder...He is looking at houses again, but this time i am stayin out of it, i am not going to inerfear, last time i got alittle to into it and excited. But i think i need to back off when it comes to his things. I love my John, he is wonderful!! :) Welp, i need to get in bed.....Oh yeah only a week and a half till school starts back....ahhhh...ahhhhh....lol....well nighty...night.....bye....bye..... 8/22/04~ Well yesterday was a good day and last night, me and my man, went out, it was so nice to spend some time with him with out the kids. But then he got mad at me right before we got home, so that kinda spoiled it. and then today, man, he was giving me a hard time. Just for calling him, dang he really hurt my feeling, i am guilty, gulity of trying to be a careing person, dang... i dunno, i think everything will be ok, everyone has to fuss and get the stress out. So i won't hold it against him... I love him no matter what. He could be mean to me all the time and i would still love him with all my heart...lol...well school starts next week, shewww weee, i am kinda ready, i guess...lol...well, i guess i need to go to bed now...i am still alittle upset, so i think some sleep will do me good, nighty...night...bye...bye.... 8/30/04~ Well it is about time for a new page, i am tired of this one, so next time there will be a diffrent one. Well things are going pretty good with me and everything, it got a little bumpy, but everything has smoothed out for now. I had a good weekend, my man stayed with me and we got along. Friday we went riden on his bike, i had a good time. I am so so so ready for cold weather, i hate to say that, but gosh the heat is really gettin to me. Oh and i hate my car, it makes me mad, this morning the passenger window wouldn't go down, and i have no air conditioning and it was so humid, it made me feel sick. I had to go all the way up to the school just to make an appointment with someone for next week, but it was a good thing that i did go up there, cause my sis was up there and she needed $10 for school or they wasn't going to let her go to her classes, and she didn't have any money, so i had to walk all the way to the other side of the school to take it to her and then all the way back to my car and then my window still wouldn't go down, shewww, i was so hot... Oh well enough complaining...lol...Well i gotta get off here and go eat lunch with my friend....bye...bye....I have classes tomorrow...yea..all day 9am-9pm, sounds like fun....ha ha ha....bye....bye.... |
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