Chapter

From his seat on the bus, Kevin was thinking and getting prepared for the show. He was slowly slipping into his Backstreet persona. Each of the guys had their own preparations, mentally and physically, but Kevin was perhaps the most intense of the five. Mentally, his preparation took time. Physically, well, that would come later, at the venue, where he would do his stretching exercises. Tonight he would need some ice. His stunt from the afternoon was taking its toll on his knee. "Damn," he thought, "did I think I was Nick? Kev...gotta remember your age buddy....taking steps two...hell, three at a time was nuts! And, for what....." He shook his head, remembering his disappointment at reaching the outside, only to come up empty handed.

He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and placed his head on the window.

Nick, who took it upon himself to join Kevin on his bus, looked over the seat at his friend...his big bro. Nick knew that Kevin would be ok, he always was, but, it still caused him pain to see his friend hurting so deeply. He also knew to just let him be....even as hurt as he was, Kevin was the consummate professional. He would be able to dig deep inside himself and perform like he always did...the fans would never know. Only those closest to Kevin would be able to see his pain.

Nick turned back to the front of the bus, and glanced out the window.

"Holy shit!", he exclaimed, as the bus neared the corner, "that's her...that crazy woman...I think....yeah.... that IS her."

"Nick, what the hell are you talking about?", Kevin asked, while still never opening his eyes.

"Her...outside....I saw her at the hotel today. Kev, man, she's wack....I'm telling ya. She was talking away..........."

"Well..yeah...so what?", Kevin interrupted the excited young man, "so a woman is talking...news flash Nicky...women TALK...a bunch!"

"To HERSELF Kev....no one else was there," Nick replied as the bus came to a stop right at the corner. The traffic was heavy and had started to back up.

With this said, Kevin opened one eye and stole a glance out the window, asking Nick, "which one....which one is this crazy woman?"

But before Nick could even answer, Kevin felt his heart leap up to his throat.

"Nick...shit.....that's her! That's Kaylee!"

Kevin may have been drunk the night before, but he would never forget that face. Her face...so full of concern, kindness and damn.....where the hell was she going?? He jumped up just as the bus started to move again.

"MIKE...MIKE...pull over....", Kevin yelled as he ran toward the front of the bus.

"Kevin....SIT...you know I can't do that...there's no where to pull over," Mike said with a slight edge to his voice, and then added, "Luke...ya wanna deal with him? He's makin' me real nervous standin' here."

Kevin was jumping around, at the front of the bus, trying to get a better look out the window.
"Jesus Luke...look...its her..at least...I think that's her," Kevin exclaimed wildly.

"Kevin...relax buddy, you can't get off this bus and chase someone that you THINK might be Kaylee...," Luke said, while taking Kevin by the shoulders and sitting him back down. "We'll try to deal with this AFTER the show, ok? We'll try to get information from someone that works at the hotel. Flash 'em enough money...and they'll talk....ok?"

Kevin threw himself down in a seat, just as Nick approached him, and his elusive woman disappeared into the crowd of people.

"Kev....is that her?? The crazy-talkin' woman is your woman? The one that tried to help you last night?", Nick asked.

"Yeah Nick...I think that was her.....", Kevin said in a barely audible voice, "and she didn't try to help me last night .... she DID help me last night. And, she did it without having a goddamn clue who I was.....don'tcha see Nick....she stopped to help me because of ME....Kevin Richardson....not HIM...not Kevin Backstreet."

Kevin put his head back against the window, closed his eyes, and wondered how he was ever going to make it through the show tonight.

The bus pulled into the venue parking area....and then around to a secluded entrance under the arena. Luke got off the bus, followed by Nick. Kevin just sat with his eyes closed, wondering if he would ever truly be happy again. Wondering if he would ever see Kaylee again....

After a few long minutes, Kevin shook his head and made his way off the bus....into the venue.

The sound check went well. Kevin always handled the sound checks and tonight would be no different. From the first chord of music played.. the first lyric sung...Kevin Backstreet was making his presence known. His famous "intensity" was becoming visible to all present.

When he was certain that everything was to his high standards, he slipped offstage and went to the dressing room. The other guys knew better than to chase after him...this was HIS time..the time for Kevin Backstreet to emerge fully. More than any of the other guys....Kevin's two worlds were very much kept apart from each other. Kevin Richardson was a private, loving, kind and caring man. Kevin Backstreet was a walking piece of sex. He gave the fans what they wanted onstage. Kevin Backstreet swayed, flirted, thrusted and grabbed with the best of them. The true fans knew the difference in the two personas.

Kevin laid down on the couch in the dressing room and closed his eyes. Thoughts of Trish in his mind....and thoughts of Kaylee. What had happened to him since yesterday??? All he knew was that as bad as Trish hurt him....Kaylee had made him smile...and he didn't even know her. And, more unbelievable was the fact that she didn't want anything in return. He hoped that he could find her before it would be too late....and, that she would be even slightly interested in talking to him.

Little did Kevin know that all Kaylee could think about was seeing him again. He was always on her mind. Something had happened to them both that night on the sidewalk. Something that Kevin was determined to continue.