Onugu's NeoPets Help Guide

The Neolluminati

The Neopian Conspiracy Theories - Part One

Ever wondered who controls Neopia? Or why certain events happen?

I can tell you, it's the Neopian Shadow Government, otherwise known as The Neolluminati.

Lets look at the facts.
(I have included a glossary at the bottom to explain terms you may not be familiar with)

Faerieland is a Monarchy, ruled by the Faerie Queen.

Winter World is looked after by a Parliament, the leader of which is Princess Lilac (although no mention is made to any other members of parliament, and with a title like "princess" there may be evidence of rigged voting). The government here has also been described as Constitutional Plutocracy, literally meaning "rule by the rich". A Princess would have a large amount of Neopoints!

Tyrannia is a Republic, watched over by the Council of Elders. Kyruggi, Grarrg, Tekeli-Li, Plesio, Sabre-X, and Myncha.

VirtuPets Space Station was built by VirtuPets Corp, of which the evil Dr Frank Sloth is the leader.

Mystery Island is an Enlightened Despotry, populated by the Tribe of Pango, a bunch of cannibals who don't appear to have eaten anyone for quite some time. They worship the God Pango Pango.

The Crown of The Lost Desert has always been hereditary, with the recent, and somewhat suspicious, demise of King Coltzan, his daughter Princess Vyssa has risen to the throne. Also worth noting here is the lack of punishment given to Coltzan's murderer, Princess Sankara.

Maraqua is an interesting one, once a Monarchy, ruled only by one known as "The King of Maraqua", perhaps not an important enough figure to be named considering the sudden (planned?) destruction of Maraqua.

Next we have a couple of small islands, worth noting because of their size. So small, and yet still have their own leaders. Roo Island, just east off the coast Neopia, is ruler by King Roo. Lilac Island, near Winter World was hand made by Zairiu the Swift.

Then we have the two "difficult" worlds, the Haunted Woods and Krawk Island. Both exist in a permanent state of Anarchy, as is to be expected from a bunch of Ghosties and Ghoulies, and a hoard of law breaking Pirates and Smugglers!

So, what have we missed out?

Oh yes, Neopia Central. The original land, the oldest and the best known, with the largest population.

So why is there no information anywhere about whom (or what) is in charge?

It's the Shadow Government, a secret society dictating how and when events happen.

Next week, I will be presenting more evidence to back up my claims, unless I mysteriously disappear…

Should you have any disturbing facts or strange coincidences you wish to bring to my attention, please NeoMail me!

Onugu

Monarchy	Rule by a single person e.g. a King or Queen
Parliament	A group of different people from different backgrounds.
Plutocracy	Controlled by those with the most money.
Republic	Normal people vote representatives into power.
Despotry	The ruler has unlimited power.
Anarchy	No rules, no laws, complete mayhem!

Replies

These are the Neomails I got after this article appered in the Neopian Times.

Please respect these ideas as belonging to the people who thought of them, and DONT rip them off! Thank you!

From	Kit Kat (fyreeyes1)
Sent	11/2/2001 09:50pm
Subject	Adam the All-Mighty?
I do believe I know who rules Neopia Central--- Adam and his gang of lackeys, the Neopets Team. That would make it shuffles through memory an oligarchy? Adam is the main, tyrannical, unelected leader, and the Neopets Team is his group of sub-leader followers. So maybe Neopia is really... a CULT? Buh-buh-bahhhh! Fwahahaha. Conspiracy (c) FyreEyes1. ;)

From	Ali Poepfdone (poepfdone)
Sent	11/3/2001 06:52am
Subject	Conspiracy Theories
First I would like to congradulate you on your artical going into the neopian times, and secoundly mention something you may want to consider. Have you noticed we never get to see the other side of neopia? that only one side is explored. What lies on that other side? It doesn't exist! I know nothing, nothing!

From	NONE :) (ddlongerlegs)
Sent	11/3/2001 07:45am
Subject	Re: Vision
I belive that neopia is as real as the neopian times makes it, the only articles worth reading are the ones about the dealings inside of neopia, the things we, and no one else knows about, untill someone writes an article on them. If there is more than just me, then there must be a lot of others out there, who have the makings to turn neopia into something very real. I think we should make a private guild and look for the elite out there who have written articles that have enough power to create panic (or something close to it) in the unknown parts of neopia. Whadayasay?

From	Daniel R. S. (themagician79)
Sent	11/3/2001 10:14pm
Subject	Conspiracy Therories
I'd like to congratulate you on your article but would like to point out a few imprecisions: If Tyrannia is watched over by the elders it is then a Gerontocracy. (Mystery Island) An Enlightened Despotry would imply a despot and one who is enlighted (cultivated) beyond the abilities of it's subjects (much as it happened in Russia during the "époque des lumières" in the 18th century) Indeed an enlighted despotry makes direct reference to the 18th century Europe (and more precisely the proliferation of philosophers like Diderot or Rousseau) and is, in this case, inconvenient. I'd call it a socialism or an anarchy where power emanates from associations of people (tribes, if you will). In the same way, VirtuPets Space Station would be an Anonymous Society (sorry for the rough translation from french), a Corporation driven by stock ownership, and Frank Sloth would be the CEO/COO of the corporation. Looking forward to your "conspiracy theories" which promises to be most intriguing. -daniel

From	ryan prado (topnovil)
Sent	11/4/2001 12:51am
Subject	none
hey, how u doin I was reading ur article, entitled 'The Neopian Conspiracy Theories', and while i applaud your efforts to notify the current users of neopets of the political status of Neopia, i couldnt help but notice in your glossary, that u described anarchism as 'No Rules, No Laws, Complete Mayhem!'. Have you taken the time to research anarchism and the social values it stands for? Or did you simply follow the modern stereotype and dictionary description of anarchy being total chaos and disorder. I believe that the capitalist regimes of the two party systems we have today are complete mayhem. I realise that this is not really related to Neopets, however i believe your glossary of terms is not accurate. Cheers for your time, Ryan

From	Olly Cant (olly_nookie)
Sent	11/4/2001 08:38am
Subject	none
just thought i'd lend a hand with your report on the leaders of neopia, i'm not sure if this is usfull but what the hey! 1. I noticed today that the monocrocer sed to me three times today "I've eaten __ wockys in the past month" well each time he sed a diferent number, what's all that about? 2. The ghosts that steal money from you, WHY has nobody ever done anything about this? and why do they steal from the money tree only to give to it again? 3. why is it that items and money are found just lying around neopia? Do people just decide to throw away codestones and money? Do they PANTS! perhaps this is the remains of people who stumbled across the rulers of neopia and learned to much.

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