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You have no idea how badly you have hurt me. You don't remember the things you said. You were too drunk, or so you claim. But I remember. And it hurts every time I recall. I suppose it makes it easier for you to blame me, rather than to acknowledge your own fault in the matter. If it makes you feel better. I suppose that's your motto, come to think of it. Your actions of late have sure demonstrated that. I can see right through your excuses. Even if I don't want to, I know your reasons.
I feel miserable. I can't believe this is happening to me. I can't believe I let it. I wish you wouldn't be mad at me. Perhaps you wouldn't be so mad if you could remember what happened. We can't undo the past. Neither you nor I can change the situation. I can't make it right, but I desperately want to move on, to forget. I'm further trapped in a prison because of what you told me this week and how you treated me. You broke your promise. Even after we discussed this, after we apologized. I thought we understood each other, but I suppose that's my fault. We can't get past this now. You can't even be civil.
My confidence is shaken. I never ever would have believed I could be so wrong about someone. I never would have pegged you as the kind of person to turn on me this way. What can you possibly hope to have gained by breaking your promise? You can't possibly feel better now.
And now I'm all alone in my pain and anger and sorrow. You've scarred me more than I really care to admit. And today when you spoke so coldly to me, I was shaking for hours afterward. I can't even look at you without feeling sick. I'm trying to act normal, to pretend I'm not deeply hurt. Do you have any idea how I really feel, how hard this has been for me? I don't think you do. I don't think you want to know. You want to pretend you're the one who got hurt. Well, baby, you should be hurting. I'm convinced you planned it. Your actions scream guilt. You played me, you smug, self-righteous son of a bitch.
I didn't do this to you, dear. If you could remember, you'd know that you did this to me.
Will it always be like this? Oh God, please don't let it always be like this. I made a mistake, dammit! I never should have trusted you.
I want to forget your existence. I wish I could.
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