Broadcast: December 21, 2003

RECIPE FROM MRS. SANTA CLAUS

     Hello, I'm Mrs. Santa Claus, glad to be here on A Jarful of Stories, coming to you from my kitchen here at the North Pole.
     Listen, Christmas is coming up and I want to give you my recipe for the world's largest Christmas cookie. Now, you might not ever need to bake this monster, but you never know.
     Once a year I make one of these cookies, you see, and Santa, that's my husband, takes this cookie with him on Christmas Eve and somehow, I don't really know how, he gives a little of this cookie to all the good boys and girls all over the world. Does that sound like a pretty tall order? Yes, I guess it is, by gum, but he's a pretty amazing fellow, that Santa. Works all year long for just one day. Wish I could tell you how he does it but let's just say there's some magic at work, too.
     Anyway, like I was saying, I'm going to give you, all the listeners to A Jarful of Stories, this recipe so maybe you can make one of these huge cookies, too. Got a piece of paper and a pencil so you can write it down? Good.
     Start with about five hundred train loads of flour. Sift the flour a little to get out the lumps and then put it in a large bowl—about the size of Ohio. Now add some milk. You're going to need about enough milk to fill Lake Michigan, more or less. Next dump in a few dozen dump trucks of baking powder. Stir with a very large spoon. Are you getting all this?
     Gather two train loads of medium eggs and add them. Stir again.
     Now, here's the fun part, put in chocolate chips or raisins or little candies—whatever you like—and mix again. You're going to need enough chocolate chips to stretch from here to the moon. Like Santa says, don't scrimp on the chips.
     Where was I? Mix all that together and then flatten your cookie. I usually use elves to do this work but you can do it with a couple hundred bulldozers. Just make sure the bulldozers are extra clean.
     Ok, now slip your cookie into a very big oven and bake for 35 minutes at 350 degrees. I usually spread out my cook on the Sahara Desert and that does the trick.
     And lastly, make up a batch of frosting. You're going to need enough to fill a football stadium. Spread that nice and thin and decorate your cookie however you wish. That's the place to really doll it up, with the frosting. I usually spread the frosting with special tractor but you can do it however you wish.
     Well, that's my recipe and I hope you enjoy your cookie! Oh, and merry Christmas!

The End