I was so shocked when I found out that I was pregnant with Justin. I was 3 months at the time and I was thinking oh no I hope it's not like the last one. But then again I was so happy my husband and I were together at the time, I got pregnant with Justin. But it wasn't my husband's baby and at that time I didn't know what to do. So I didnt tell my husband I was pregnant,( you see my husband cheated on me ) and thats when i started seeing this other guy and when my husband found out he filed for a divorce and sure enough we got a divorce. I started seeing this other guy and got pregnant. The baby was his and he always talked about wanting children , until I told him I was pregnant. He turned on me, it was like he had done a 180 degree circle and started treating me like a slave and beat on me( because even though my ex husband were divorced we still talked and were friends and he got jealous). He started to beat on me and I tried to leave and he wouldn't let me. He tried to poison me and when I would talk to my ex on the phone he would scream and yell and he ripped the cord out of the wall and tried to tie it around my neck and choke me with it. He even tried to slice my wrists with a steak knife. So one day when he was gone at work I called my ex husband and told him what was going on and he told me to get out of there. I asked him where I was going to go and he said I could stay with him at his mothers house. I took him up on his offer and left. When I got there he was there with open arms, we laughed and cried and held each other. I told him about Justin and he said not to worry, I'll take care of him. I don't want that jerk in his life I'm his daddy. We planned on getting remarried and being a family or so I thought. Thats when it hit me something was wrong. So I went to the doctor because I had been cramping so bad I was doubled over . I found out that I had, had another miscarriage. I lost Justin 1/26/02 at 4:30pm, a month before my husband and I got married. My husband and I are remarried now and we are doing great, but there is not a day that goes by that we don't think of Mkayla and Justin. We love and miss them so much and maybe someday we will get to have a child, but until then we will just live for God because He knows what is best and He knows what is in store for us.
My little Justin mommys little prince I miss you so much more than words could say I don't know what made your daddy so mean that he had to take u away but you are in a better place now a place where he will never be able to harm you ever again.... I always dreamed that you would be a little football player and mommy would get to go with your sissy to watch your games and we would cheer you on and say yeah go Justin mommy is so proud of you...but mommy doesn't get to do that and never will but I want to let you know that even though your not here with me on earth you are here in spirit and that mommy is still proud of you and to say that she had a son...baby there is so much mommy could say but it will never bring you back and mommy knows that but I want to let you know that I love you with all my heart and soul and I will see you in heaven someday...until then have fun playing in Gods garden with your sister and with mama white I love you baby mommy misses you so much love forever your mommy Jami Sue Murphy
Links to Other Sites For Justin
Justin's Angelwings
Dear Justin
1/26/03
1 Year In Heaven
Mommys angel baby
Well baby it is your first year anniversary in heaven and mommy misses you so very much. I am thinking of you on your angel day and I'm missing you more than words can say....I am sitting here watching the superbowl and thinking how you would be getting into things and making a mess and it makes me smile.....Mommy and some of mommy's friends ate some good food mommy cooked and oh how I wished you could've been there to be by mommy's side.....There hasn't been anytime this whole week that mommy hasn't thought about you......I love and miss you so much baby.........Happy 1 Year Anniversary Bday Mommy Loves You.....just know that mommy loves and misses you more everyday
Love you baby
Your mommy Jami Sue Murphy
  
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