Talk about kid’s stuff – This one’s from Joel! Two kids were arguing about whose father can beat up whose father. One boy said, "My father is better than your father." The other kid said, "Well, my mother is better than your mother." The first boy paused and said, "I guess you're right. My father says the same thing."

So, just where is the smell coming from? Mike sends us a brilliant one! Mary went to the doctor complaining of body odour. "Do you wash?" the doctor asked the smelly young girl. "Oh, yes," Mary answered. "Each morning, I start at my head and wash down as far as possible. Then I start at my feet and I wash up as far as possible." "Well," the doctor concluded, "Go home and wash 'possible'

Steve passed by while Van was painting a house.He noticed Van was working extrememly fast."What’s the hurry Van?". "I want to finish the job before I run out of paint"

A farmer died and left his entire spread to his only son. Twenty four hours later, the bank foreclosed on the farm..
"Well" noted the son ,"Dad did say that the farm would be mine one day"

CEO:"My wife made a millionaire out of me".
Assistant:"What were you before?
CEO:"A multimillionaire"

A politician is walking down the road with an ostritch on a rope.A man saw them and asked, "Where are you going with that baboon?"
"Its not a baboon,"replied the politician.
"I wasn’t speaking to you", said the man.

"What is the difference between democracy and socialist democracy?"
"The same as between a chair and an electric chair".