Season Ten
Season Ten

Gunshow

"We have small problems?"

"Trade secrets? You make guns, not soda pop, Mr. Weber."

Powell: "Oh, my client's a healthy young man. Life without parole--that could be fifty, sixty years."
Abbie: "He could always take up smoking."

"This isn't a trial, this is gun control by other means."

Killerz

Adam: "Little girl killers?"
Abbie: "You can't believe it because they wear knee socks and pigtails?"

DNR

Merger

"Mr. Kaufer, is this a temporary situation or are your clients just poor?"

"They cover the waterfront -- everything from tossing the DNA to changing the color of my lipstick."

"These people are aliens."

Jack: "What the hell is this marriage about?"
Abbie: "Well, I'm guessing love isn't at the top of the hit parade."

"You're suggesting she killed her sister but a few months of rest and high fiber diet will make it all better?"

"Ruin what? Your chances of joining the Mayflower Tea Club is they ever find out your daughter was knocked up at 14?"

[After Jack and Abbie realize Mercedes didn't kill her "sister"]
"So which one? Mister or Missus Garrison? Unless we wanna give Adam a heart attack, we'd better pick one... "

Kaufer: :"You can expect our motions on this crime tomorrow."
Abbie: "Sounds like you're the one with a knot in your shorts."

Abbie: "How often do you see him?"
Carlita: "You know."
Abbie: "No, I really don't."

"Hmm. Yeah, someone spilled something alright."

Jack: "Christie bites her for some reason...couple of hours later Christie's dead."
Abbie: "I guess big sister bit back."

"Either way it turns my stomach."

Justice

Dupree: "This can't be happening to me."
Abbie: "It's not. It happened to Felder."

"His bad luck his lawyer's dead."

"I've pulled the complete Hagen file out of storage. It was worth the allergy attack."

Marathon

Patsy

Lawyer: "He wants to talk to them [the grand jury]."
Abbie: "To talk about what? His political connections?"

"You call it a touchdown, I'll wait for the instant replay."

Jack: "We can only go where the best evidence takes us."
Abbie: "And if justice gets served along the way, great."

Blood Money

Sundown

Jack: "Find women who are less--"
Abbie: "Stupid?"

"It's like you've entered the fourth circle of hell."

"If he weren't sick, I'd say fry him."

Jack: "They're all sick one way or another. What makes him so different?"
Abbie: "Well, let's see. Oh yeah, Alzheimer's."

Loco Parentis

Lawyer: "All they've got is coincidence."
Abbie: "You get enough coincidences, they start to add up."

Jack: "How did he manage to clean up all that blood?"
Abbie: "He got an 'A' in home ec?"

(to Jack): "So you like this junk?"

Collision

"Are you alleging his semen beamed into her vagina?"

(to Jack): "If your hippie friends could see you now...."

"I'm not comfortable with the idea of our shoving pills down a man's throat."

Mother's Milk

Panic

Hays: "If she wasn't upset, why did she miss?"
Abbie: "She didn't miss, Mr. Hays, she just killed the wrong person."

"Wouldn't a laptop be more useful than a negligee?"

"I put the hogs back in the pen."

Entitled (Crossover with Law & Order: Special Victim's Unit)

Entitled

Fools for Love

Abbie: "Maybe he was with the missing girl who was maybe with the dead girls? I can't take that to a judge."
Ed: "We can make it sound more definite."
Abbie: "You have to make it be more definite, Ed."

"Abused or not, she was there. It's her own sister, for God's sake. You can't let her off the hook."

(on the tape): Jack: "It's disturbing, all right."
Abbie: "Disturbing? Our prime witness against Williams might be as big a sociopath as he is."

"'Bottom-line it?' Hell, our backs are to the wall, help us find a way out."

Trade This

Abbie: "Okay, Sean Alverez filed a federal lawsuit against Braddock & Todd six weeks ago."
Lennie: "What was the basis for the lawsuit?"
Abbie: "Sexual harassment. He alleged a hostile work environment."
Ed: "Someone was hitting on him?"
Abbie: "Not necessarily. All he has to do is establish his work environment is upsetting."
Lennie: "I could do that."
Abbie: "Upsetting sexually, Lennie."

"It's not exactly a sound business practice to give money to a man who just lost his shirt in the market."

"It's like a virtual lawsuit."

"Is this really a murder for hire or just some garden-variety 'let's kill my broker?'"

"What the people want, Mr. Braddock, is a level playing field."

Jack: "He said it was you who paid Mitchell Simms to kill Sean Alverez."
Abbie: "That's murder for hire, Mr. Valentine. You get a needle for that in this state--and it won't be for a flu shot."

Dantoni: "My son's a moron, but he's not a murderer."
Abbie: "So he's only half a chip off the old block."

Black, White, and Blue

"Springtime in Albany. Maybe I'll meet a nice bureaucrat."

Mega

Abbie; "Six years ago, he was convicted of assault and battery in Pennsylvania."
Jack: "Some guy refused to embrace success?"
Abbie; "No, someone refused to get out of the car--his wife."

"If you took a page from this guy's book, Lennie, you'd still be married."

"What'd you do? Convince Callister to withhold funds to make your husband even crazier?"

"You were destined to lie?"

"I don't know what the point is, lady, but you're making my skin crawl."

Surrender Dorothy

Lennie: "I thought you guys could indict a ham sandwich."
Abbie: "Without the statement, I'm missing the ham."

Adam: "Why rule it a murder in the first place?"
Abbie: "A woman's body is recovered from the trunk of her car under the circumstances of a robbery. What other conclusion would you have them draw?"

"I want to know what the ethics are on turning a patient into your daughter-in-law."

"Who uses a murder confession as a defense to manslaughter?"

"Let's call his bluff. Add a murder count. If he really wants to play pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey, then let's give the jury a place to put it."

"False confessions, double jeopardy--this guy thought he could control the entire system."

Untitled

(on the defense): "The painting made me do it."

"Where I come from, they'd throw that thing in a barbeque pit."

Narcosis

[after Lennie reads a profile saying a guy is rich, 38, drives a Porsche, well-endowed, etc] "And he still couldn't get a real date?"

"You guys are such suckers."

Jack: "A jury will see these for what they are: vile threats against a woman was then brutally murdered. by your client."
Lawyer: "Virtual threats, Mr. McCoy, made in virtual reality."
Abbie: "Against a woman who is more than virtually dead."

"He might as well say Playboy made him do it. It's ridiculous."

"Lie to him, we'll take it from there."

Mrs. Malone: "He's just a boy!"
Abbie: "She didn't know that, Mrs. Malone, she thought he was a 38 year old stud..."

[to Jack]"It happens sometimes when your victim is sleazier than the defendant. You know that."

High & Low

Anita: "This is a statement signed by Jay Hurley implicating you in the murder."
Abbie (to suspect): "Squeeze that between your knees."

Stiff

"I'm going to where anyone who wants to poison their neighbor goes to first these days."

"Suicide...accident...breath mint. This guy gives me a headache."

"Spare me the violins."

Abbie: "So who do we believe, Shipman or Debbie Mason?"
Jack: "I've never liked doctors."
Abbie: "I don't like people who pick on their mothers."

"We don't hand out brownie points for helping people kill themselves."

"She slipped from one nightmare into another."

Vaya Con Dios

Jack: "This could have been me."
Abbie: "I can't really picture you with the Che Guera look."

Ed: "Maybe it's time we stay out of their business."
Abbie: "That would have been good advice for Jason Whitman."

Abbie: "We're tilting at windmills."
Jack: "What windmills? Jason Whitman was tortured and murdered."
Abbie: "Over there."
Jack: "And I've got a flesh-and-blood suspect right here."
Abbie: "So now we claim jurisdiction over every New Yorker who's killed?"

"If you think you heard a shoe drop, you did."

(to Jack, who's up to his old tricks): "Well, maybe I misunderstood, but I thought this case was about principle, because it certainly hasn't been about the law."

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