Redneck Jokes
You might be a Redneck if...
One of your kids was born on a pool table.
You have spray painted your girlfriends name on an overpass.
Your life time goal is to own a fireworks stand.
Someone asks to see your I.D. and you show them your belt buckle.
Mailpouch sends you christmas cards.
Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does.
You need one more hole punched in your card to get a free-bie
from house of tattoos.
You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.
On your first date you had to ask your dad for the keys to the tractor.
You think the mountain men in the movie "Deliverence"
were just misunderstood.
You refer to the fifth grade as your senior year.
Three quarters of the clothes you own have LOGO's on them.
Your hunting dog cost more than the truck you drive him around in.
Your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.
You have been to a funeral and there's been more pickup's
in the parking lot than cars.
You bought an 8-track player to put in your truck.
You ever had to climb a water tower with a bucket of paint
to defend your sisters honor.
It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.
Your truck has a two-tone paint job,
Primer red and Primer gray.
You can't get married to your sweethart cause there is a law against it.
You've been on T.V. more than 5 times
describing what the tornado sounded like.
Your aunt and grandmother went to the funeral and had a fight
over who gets to be the widow.
You can tell your age by the number of rings around your bathtub.
If you ever used a toliet brush as a back scratcher.
You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.
Your a light bear drinker, cause you start drinking
whenever it gets light outside.
Your speakers used to belong to "Moonlight Drive-in Theater"
