Misty woke up and crinkled her nose. Somehow, Kris was already awake and eating Steak �n� Shake chicken fingers and fries, and had dipped a few chocolate covered pretzels in the honey mustard provided with the meal. She saw Zac dead asleep on the bed, with a coat and his shoes still on. Misty looked over to Kris, rather disgusted.
�What are you eating?�
�Food.�
�When did you get it?� Misty looked at the clock. �It�s seven in the morning. How�d you get the food?�
�I made Zac get it.�
�Oh, that�s why he�s still got his coat and shoes on.�
�Yeah. I made him get it around four in the morning, but I fell asleep before he came back and I just woke up a few minutes ago and started eating.�
�I can�t believe he went.�
�I told him I�d make his life hell if he didn�t do it.�
�Oh, then okay.�
�He was so tired he kept coming back in here for things he�d forgot. He came back in about four times.� Misty rolled her eyes and sat on the edge of the bed.
�You doing okay?� Misty asked. �Last time I checked you were pretty bent out of shape.�
�Yeah, well, I�m not much better now. We didn�t get to talk things out. I know he�s still upset about it, but I don�t want to bother him right now. He was up until four thinking, and then I made him go out and get me food. So he can sleep until we have to leave.�
�When do we have to leave?�
�In about two hours. You still need to pack.�
�Yeah, I do.� She sat on the edge of her bed, looking over at Zac. She laughed. �He looks so funny.�
�He must of just crashed when he got back.� Kris looked over at him. He was sprawled out on the bed, now having it to himself, and was nearly drooling over the pillow. His coat was tangled up in the blanket that covered him, and his shoes poked out from the bottom. �He could tell when I got off the bed, though, cause I stood up and could barely look back before he�d taken up the entire thing.�
�Well he�s buff and you�re pregnant and you�re sharing a twin bed.�
�When we get to Chicago we�ll have my bed to sleep it. I got a queen when I started dating him.�
�Oh really? What was that suggesting?�
�That we like to sleep together.� Kris dunked another chocolate covered pretzel in honey mustard and ate it.
�Oh God that�s disgusting!!�
�I would think so, but it�s really not.� She did it again.
�Ew! Stop that!�
�Stop looking!� Misty got up and grabbed her suitcase from the closet. She walked over to the dresser and started to pack.
�How long are we going to be there?�
�A week, maybe a week and a half.�
�Okay.� She threw clothes into her suitcase, surprisingly quick and organized. Kris watched in amazement, as she threw in shirt after shirt, and they landed in the same place in the suitcase, still neatly folded.
�I take it you�re good with packing.�
�I�m excellent with packing. I�m quick, too.�
�I take like a week to pack. I have to pick out my outfits, lay them out, then fold them and stick them in the suitcase and hope it�s big enough.�
�I don�t plan my outfits, I just throw clothes in. Sometimes they match, otherwise I usually end up buying another outfit, but they usually do match.� She went into the closet and got out her pants, having to fold them then throw them in the suitcase. �I hate going back home in the cold. I best have a lot of sweaters at home because I only have one here.�
�Most of my winter clothes are back home.�
�Mine too. It does get very cold here.�
�It was kinda cold last night.�
�Yeah, it was, but that�s during the night. I bet you anything the plane will be delayed because of snow.� Kris smiled.
�I hope it�s a white Christmas this year. I hate this warm weather all year long.�
�Me too. I miss snow.� Zac shifted, waking up. �I think we�re being a little too loud.� Kris slowly got up and walked over to Zac. He turned and looked at her.
�Hey,� he said.
�What are you doing up?�
�You�re talking. It woke me up.�
�Go back to sleep, hun, we�ll keep it down.� He smiled at her.
�You�re so beautiful.� She smiled widely, shocked but thrilled with him comment. That was the last thing rolling through her mind at that point. She�d been eating like a pig, and felt herself gaining weight. He�d always known when she needed that kind of reassurance.
�I know,� she said, looking away. She looked back at him. �Now really, go back to sleep.�
�I don�t know if I can��
�I�ll scratch your back.�
�Okay!� He turned onto his stomach. She took off his coat and started scratching his back with her long nails.
�You gonna take off your shoes?�
�Maybe.�
�I�ll do it.�
�Have Misty do it, I don�t want you to stop.� Kris looked over at Misty. She stood there, indecisive.
�Fine, I�ll do it,� she said, and walked over. She took off Zac�s shoes while Kris continued to run her nails over his back. It didn�t take long for him to fall back asleep, even though he�d been fighting it so he could feel her nails on his back. When Kris knew he was asleep, she stopped and walked back over to the table.
�You two are so incredibly cute together,� Misty said. �I love you guys. I never want you to break up.�
�Neither do I, but he�s got other ideas.�
�Have you talked about it at all?�
�Not yet. I really don�t want to ruin the trip if we talk about it there, but we�re going to have to and he knows it.�
�So you don�t know what you�re going to do once the baby�s born?�
�We are getting that apartment. That�s for sure. If he decides he won�t be living with me, then it�s just gonna be the two of us. But I want the apartment for her, I can�t raise a child in a dorm room. I think I�m gonna take a break, though. I can�t stay in school and raise a child at the same time.�
�Kris! You can�t just take a break. When you�re at your classes, I won�t be and I can stay and watch her.�
�You know I don�t want to take any of your free time. This is my baby, not yours.�
�We�re sure that Zac isn�t going to take her?�
�No! He�s going to be travelling everywhere and doing everything all the time, he barely sees me as it is, he�s so busy. I don�t think he�ll have the time to look after his child and work at the same time.�
�Then he wouldn�t be living with you anyway.� Kris sat back and thought about it. He wouldn�t. He wouldn�t be living with her even if they decided to raise the baby together. Even if they got married, he couldn�t stay at home and raise her. He had his job and he�d be gone all the time. By the looks of it, the career wasn�t letting up at all. For the next half of the pregnancy he�d be gone. She knew it. He�d come back maybe once or twice to check up on it, then come back when she was in labor, but he wouldn�t stay long. He�d give her money all the time to help out, but he�d never actually be a father to her.
�Shit.�
�You�re stuck on your own no matter what.�
�It�s just�it�s just he said he wanted me to find someone else when the baby was born. Basically saying we should break up once the baby is born. I don�t want that. I�m happy with my relationship with him. If we break up I don�t know if he�d stop by at all! My daughter will grow up not knowing who her father is and why he isn�t around like everyone else�s. I don�t want that.�
�There�s not much you can do about it, Kris. He said he was going to support you, and I believe very well that he will. He just won�t be a father to her. Your best bet is to just let her know who her father is and why he isn�t around.�
�I hate this. I hate this whole thing. I want him to be there, I want him to be a father.�
�But he�s not going to be.�
Kris looked over to Zac, asleep on the bed. She loved him with all her heart, more so since she got pregnant and he professed his love for her as much as with their daughter. He always talked to her and told her he�d spoil her rotten, but he could never do those things. He could just give her guilt gifts�It�s your first birthday and I can�t be there so here�s a pony you�ll never be able to ride. Here�s a whole bunch of toys you�ll never use. But the one thing I won�t give you is the one thing you need the most. I won�t be giving you love and affection. I won�t give you myself completely for anything you need, my lap to sit in, my arms to hold you in, my heart to love you with. I�ll give you birthday cards signed �Love, Daddy� but in your Mommy�s handwriting; I�ll give you that new dolly you�ve been bugging Mommy about for the past few weeks. But I won�t really be getting you those things because I don�t know what they are. I�ll give Mommy money so she can buy it for you. You�ll find that the gifts you like the most come from Mommy or from the money I gave her. I won�t be there to watch you walk, I won�t be there to watch you talk, I won�t be there to take you to school, or beat off your first boyfriend when he hurts you, I won�t be there to walk you down the aisle at your wedding�Mommy will give you a card from me on your wedding day. You�ll look at the �Love, Daddy� that you�d seen on every card from me since you were born, then look at Mommy�s card and realize it was the same handwriting. You�ll see for the first time that Daddy was really Mommy all along, and Daddy doesn�t even know who you are, what you do, or what a beautiful woman you�ve become. You�ll see all the material objects I�ve given you over the years of your life, but the one thing you�d always wanted, always wasted your birthday wish on, was to see me. Once.
The plane landed in Chicago later that day. Kris walked out, a slight smile on her face. She was waiting to see her mother and David there, and the reaction they had when they found out she was pregnant. That�d be a sight to see. She loosely laced her fingers with Zac�s, Misty on her other side, as they walked through the terminal and out to the waiting area.
Kris�s eyes locked with Cynthia, David standing next to her. Their eyes simultaneously looked down at her stomach, and their mouths dropped. She walked up to them and gave them each a hug, before Zac took his turn along with Misty.
�What the hell?� Cynthia said, putting her hand on Kris�s stomach. The baby kicked. Cynthia yanked her hand away. �You�re got a baby in you!�
�Yes, I do,� Kris said, smiling. �I�m going to have a baby in four and a half months.�
�And you never bothered to tell me?� Cynthia said. She looked over at Zac. �You slept with my daughter!� Cynthia began to hit him.
�Ow! Ow! I�m sorry!�
�You two aren�t married!�
�Like you ever waited to get married, Ma,� Kris muttered.
�At least I didn�t get pregnant before I got married.�
�That�s why you got married!!�
�I�m still really disappointed in the both of you.� Cynthia sighed. �Come on, let�s go home.� She turned and they all walked to the baggage claim. David took Kris�s bags, while Zac took both his and Misty�s. Misty and Kris walked behind them all, talking.
�Did you see the look on her face?� Kris asked. �That was classic.�
�I still can�t believe you didn�t tell her.�
�I wanted to surprise her.� Kris thought of something. �Ma, we gotta go to Johnny�s before we go home.�
�You can go to Johnny�s after we go home. I don�t go there and you know that.�
�What do you have against them? Those people are as much of a family to me as you are.�
�I don�t go there.� They walked to the car. David drove, Cynthia sat in front, while Zac, Misty, and Kris sat in the back. They made a quick stop at the house to drop off their things, then Zac and Kris got back into the car and drove to Johnny�s. Misty wanted to go to her place and get some things (she just didn�t want to be a third wheel, considering she almost never went to Johnny�s), so Kris and Zac drove over to their favorite place in the world.
Zac held the door open for Kris, who strolled in, her hand on her stomach and a smile on her face. She looked at Matt, the clerk at that time of day. At the sound of the bell, he looked up, and jumped back.
�Guys!! Kris is here! And she�s got someone we haven�t met yet with her!� The guys ran from the back room.
�Who? Who�d she bring with?� the chef said. His eyes fell on her stomach. �You�re pregnant! You brought along a baby!� They ran over and crowded her, all giving her a hug and a kiss and trying to talk her into letting them listen to the baby in her stomach. Kris sat on a stool and let them all put their hand on her stomach, and their ear to her stomach. The baby felt her excitement and was kicking and turning, so they all got to feel the baby kick.
�Congrats, dude,� Matt said to Zac. �How old are you now?�
�Eighteen.�
�Eighteen and you got a kid on the way? Hmph, you guys move fast.� Zac laughed. �You�re not gonna walk away, I hope.�
�No, I�m not.�
�Good, cause I�d beat your ass. Kris here�s just like my baby girl and to see her having a baby herself�it�s weird.�
�Well now I get to have my baby girl.�
�It�s a girl? You thought of names yet?�
�No, not yet. We�re still got have the pregnancy to go yet to think about it. I�ve got a few ideas, though.�
�Yeah, and they all suck,� Kris said, looking over at him.
�Come on! It�s my turn! You go away, you already have a kid,� one of the clerks said to the chef. �I wanna listen to the baby!� Kris found it all amusing, how these guys were all running over each other so they could get a chance to listen to the baby inside of her.
�They don�t suck! You don�t just don�t know a good name when you hear it.�
�No, you just don�t know how to name a kid.�
�Shut up.�
�No.� He gave her a look. She returned it. They both laughed. �Okay guys, I�m hungry. Gimme some food.� They all grumbled and returned to the kitchen.
�Hey, Louie! I gotta talk to you,� Zac said, and went back into the kitchen. Kris immediately turned to Matt.
�He said that after the baby�s born I should find someone else because he won�t be around to help raise her.�
�He just told me that he was going to stick around��
�He just didn�t want to seem like a jerk in front of everyone. He doesn�t really want to talk to Louie, he just wants to get out of the way so I can tell you all this and you can�t rip on him out here when I mention everything to you.�
�I am going to rip on him! I�ll beat his ass!� Matt turned to leave. Kris grabbed him and pulled him back.
�Don�t make a scene. Don�t even talk to him. There�s no way he can be around all the time, especially with his career. This is a truly rare opportunity for me to spend time with him. I�ve always had it that way, and it�s the way I�m used to. It�s probably for the better that I do find someone else to help me raise my daughter, even if I want him to be involved at much as possible.�
�Kris, he has to stick around. Do not let his career be more important than his family.�
�It is his career that allows me to raise her by myself. It�s his career that allows me to get an apartment and raise her as a single mother without any problems financially whatsoever. I�m twenty-one, I don�t have a job. He�s eighteen. If he doesn�t have this career, I won�t be able to work and he won�t have a good job because he�s still young. He allows me to be able to put food on the table and a house over my daughter�s head. As much as I want him home to help me and be involved in her life, if it happens we will be so poor that we won�t be able to survive. The both of us will end up working two jobs and putting her into daycare and I don�t want that at all.�
�Kris, you�re my baby. I know how much you love him. I don�t want you to give this all up just because you want a rich life for your daughter. Being rich without a father is so much worse than being poor and have a happy family.�
�We wouldn�t be very happy.�
�Yes you would. You�re glowing with him. I�ve seen you without him. You�re not the same. You need him with you.�
�I can�t ask him to just quit his career, what he loves to do so much, just to raise my child which I am fully capable of doing myself.�
�You need to think about it. I don�t want to see you like this, alright. I know it hurts you. Even with that speech you gave me, I know you won�t be happy. It�ll hurt you til the very end to give him up for his stupid career.�
�It�s not a stupid career, it�s something he loves doing and wants to do for the rest of his life!�
�And not be with you?�
�And not be with me. I want him happy as much as I want my daughter happy.�
�What about you? Don�t you think about you anymore?�
�I�m not important anymore!� Kris said, banging her hand on the table. �It was never about me, ever. It always about him. And now it�s about my daughter too. They�ll both be happy with what we choose and that�s it.�
�So that is just it? You�re just going to let him leave you alone. You�re going to let him be selfish and work at what he wants to do and live a great life with anyone he wants except for you.�
�Yes.�
�Dammit, Kris! You�re so na�ve.� Matt looked in her eyes. �Do you really think he�s going to be happy with anyone but you?� She looked down. �Look at me when I�m talking to you, Kris.� She looked back up at him. �He�s got that same love for you that you�ve got for him. He wants you happy just as much as you want him happy. He may let you go but always and forever he�ll be upset about his decision because you let him go. Don�t let him go.�
�I have to��
�You don�t have to do anything. You need to do what you can to keep him with you. If it ends up that both of you have to work, as long as you both can be happy and raise your child together, nothing else matters. You�ll be happy with each other.�