| FAT Bitches |
| Yup, fat bitches are worse than experiencing massive, MASSIVE diarrhea due to eating Lays. I know I covered the whale known as the "fat bitch", but I didn't really go into detail in that article. The main part I left out was their TENDENCY TO DON TIGHT AND REVEALING CLOTHING IN ORDER TO GIVE THE ILLUSION OF BEING SEXY. Sadly, fat bitches lack the illusional skills of magicians such as David Copperfield and Siegfried and Roy. You ever seen that typical fat bitch at your school who CONSTANTLY wears short skirts, sometimes with an EXTREMELY exposing tank top? All that revealed FAT sorta mesmerizes you with its jiggling and non-stop vibrations. It also prevents you from having boners for approximately 7 days and 7 nights. If you're wondering who I'm describing at the moment, it's mainly all of them fried-chicken eating, cock-sucking, loud-mouthed bitches. But if you are in need of a more specific example (cause there's JUST SO MANY fried-chicken eating, cock-sucking, loud-mouthed bitches), try Katrina from the Leuzinger High School Student Council. I've known her (well, not really KNOWN, just seen her around) for about two years now, and she's CONSTANTLY wearing these mini-skirt type rags. The thing is, she looks moronic trying to attempt a "sexy" style by wearing short skirts. When you're as fat as a hippo, and you put on skimpy clothing in order to attract the opposite sex, the only thing you end up attracting are restraining orders and lawsuits from girlfriends of guys who claim to have turned gay just from looking at your fat ass BARELY contained by that thing you call a "denim skirt." The moral of the story is . . . only sexy girls can wear sexy clothing. Please, to all you fat bitches out there . . . just wear muumuus. |