Kat in Anime Land


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Part 12---Enter the Land of Possessed Eyebrows
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Angel looked up and blinked. "Aw, you would be so cute with short hair, Duo-chan!" she yelled, as if a light bulb had gone off in her head.

Then again, it would probably hurt if a light bulb had turned on inside her head.

"Come on!" she said, grabbing Duo's hand, "I saw a salon across the street! We'll get it cut!"
"Ahh! Get away from me, woman! You aren't touching a hair on my head! Leave me alone or I'll blast you to hell!"
"But...but...it'll be so cute..." Angel argued, tears welling up in her eyes. "Don't you want to look cute?"
Duo just glared at her. "I'm plenty cute, thank-you-very-much. I'm keeping my damn hair how it is. NOW GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF ME!"
Angel frowned at Duo. "Young man, you ARE getting your hair cut! Now COME ON!" She proceeded to drag him across the street to Dorothy's Boutique.
"Ahh!" Duo yelled, as Angel pulled him around by his braid. "LEMME 'LONE! LEMME 'LONE, BAKA!" Duo finally wrenched his hair from Angel's hands and ran away laughing maniacally. "BWAHAHAHAHA! YOU SHALL FEEL MY WRATH, GIRL!"
When Kat, Veggie, Quatre, Wufei, Heero, and Kushinda all got to the door of Dorothy's Boutique they noticed a sign that read, "BEWARE OF EYEBROWS."
"Er...are you sure we should go in here, Angel?" asked Kat.
"It can't be any scarier than Duo."
So they all went in.
"Hello! I am Dorothy. Do you have an appointment, or is this your first time?" said Dorothy.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! OMG! WHAT'S THAT ON YOUR HEAD?! QUICK! SOMEBODY HELP HER, GET THOSE THINGS OFF HER HEAD!" screamed Veggie. "QUICK, KAT LET ME SEE YOUR SWORD--OR WAIT, I THINK IT MIGHT TAKE A PICK-AXE!"
"Oh, I'm glad you noticed my eyebrows..." shouted Dorothy over Veggie's screams.
"Ummm..eyebrows? Well, you know, I just remembered I have lunch with Fuu, so I'll just be leaving now...bye!"
"Dooroothy" said Quatre with a stunned bunny look on his face.
"What's worng with him?" asked Dorothy. "No matter, everyone meet my eyebrows: the left one is Tootsie and the right eyebrow is Foojoo!"
*awkward silence*
"Sooo...who's getting their hair cut?"
"Ummm...me; I need to get the ends trimmed," replied Angel.
"Very well, follow me. The rest of you can wait here, or come too, or whatever."
So they all followed Dorothy (Quatre still with the stunned bunny look on his face, now trying to remember the names of Dorothy's eyebrows. "Tootsie and food, no, Tootsie and Moojoo, no...") to a large room with a chair to wait for someone to come and cut Angel's hair.
About an hour later, two people came into the room: one with possesed eyebrows like Dorothy's (but not quite as possesed) and really wild, curly hair, and one with a long braid and black on.
"Duo? I thought you ran away to get your Gundam and torch us all!"
"HI! I'M GROONKBOB, AND THIS IS MY PONY KYRA! OH YEAH, AND GUESS WHAT?! I'M HERE TO CUT YOUR HAIR AND I'VE NEVER EVEN USED SCISSORS! THIS SHOULD BE FUN! SPAZ!" said the person with the possesed eyebrows.
"YOU SEE, THIS IS INJUSTICE IN TOKYO! YOU GO TO GET YOUR HAIR CUT AND YOU END UP WITH SOME ONE WHO DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE SCISSORS! INJUSTICE, I SAY!"
"Wufei, shut up," snapped Kat.
"FOR THE LAST TIME, I AM NOT YOUR HOMIE OR PONY OR WHATEVER, SO LEAVE ME ALONE!" shouted the girl with the braid. She then turned around to Angel and said, "I'm Kyra Croswell. I will be your hair-cutter-person today...so how would you like it cut?"
"Oh, I get it! You must be Duo's long lost sister! I think I heard him babble something about that one time. I need the ends trimmed."
"Kyra is a hair stylist! Kyra is a hair-stylist!" Groonkbob danced around her and shouted. "I am a hair-cutter!"
...And thus did Angel's hair cut begin.

:::last edited by veggie:::

Several minutes later and halfway through Angel's haircut, a loud crashing noise was heard coming from outside. "A-HAHAHAHAHA" yelled Duo, "YOU ALL SHALL DIE!"
"Ahh!" yelled Angel, jumping up from the barber's chair where Kyra was diligently chopping her hair to an almost-shoulder legnth. "It's Duo-chan!"
Angel ran back out onto the street, with the rest of the party (Quatre, Groonkbob, Kat, Wufei, Dorothy, Kyra, Veggie, Heero, and Kusanagi) following close behind.
"What the hell...?" said Kat, as Kusanagi ran up behind her.
"I must protect you!" yelled Kusi, grabbing Kat's shoulders and flinging her over his back.
"Whoa! What the fu...where are you taking me?" Kat screamed, as Kusi ran around in circles trying to find a safe place, away from Duo and his Gundam.
"Ohhhhh nooooo! Dorothy, protect me!" Quatre yelled, hiding his face in Dorothy's eyebrows.
"Wheeeee!" giggled Veggie.
"Duoooooooo!" screamed Angel, trying to yell loud enough so that Duo would hear her from inside his Gundam.
"Bwahahaha! Feel my wrath!" Duo swung out the scythe on his Gundam, attempting to hit Angel. But, mysteriously, he missed (this scene sparks memories, ne?) Duo blinked. "I guess this means that you're innocent, and I can't kill you."

:::prepare for lovey-dovey scene:::

Heero began jumping up and down and screaming. "THAT'S NOT HOW THE SCENE ENDS! YOU FLY OFF IN YOUR GUNDAM AND TELL HER YOU'LL KILL HER LATER!"
Duo jumped out of the cockpit of Deathscythe and hugged Angel.
"No, no no! You're doing it all WRONG!"
"Shut up, Heero," Angel mumbled into Duo's shoulder.

:::end of lovey-dovey scene:::

+++Three hours later+++
Duo, Angel, Kat, Veggie, Kusanagi, Heero (who was sulking in the deepest, darkest corner with Wufei), Dorothy, Quatre, Kyra, Groonkbob, and Fuu were sitting in a small parlor eating lunch.
"So tell me again what happened?" said Fuu.
"Doooooorthy...I love your eyebrows....Dooooooorothy..." moaned Quatre, staring with hearts in his eyes at Dorothy, from across the table.
Dorothy shot him a worried look and turned back to the conversation at hand.
As Kat explained the scenario that had occured several hours ago (three, to be precise), Kusanagi prowled around in the background, looking for intruders and spies.
Kyra leaned forward in her chair and backhanded Duo upside the head. "Stupid! You never try to kill your girlfriend! That's just asking for a break-up. Haven't I taught you anything?"
"Yes, Kyra, and you're so feminine; you're the perfect person to be giving me chick advice..."
"Shut up!"
"Both of you shut up," grumbled Kat, who hadn't yet finished telling her story.
Several long minutes later (during which Heero and Wufei never moved from their aforementioned dark corner, and Groonie chased Kyra around the restaraunt with a pair of hair-cutting scissors), and after Kat had told the story a fourth time to an attentive Fuu, Veggie piped up with an idea.
"How about a walk in the woods?!"
"We just got out of the woods!" sighed Kat.
Fuu leaned forward and lowered her voice confidentally. "Haven't you heard, though?"
Kat frowned. "Heard about what?"
"Those woods are haunted by demons!" Fuu hissed.
Veggie, Angel, Kat, Kyra, and Groonie jumped up. "GREAT! LET'S GO!"
"Hu--?" Fuu started, as Veggie grabbed her hand and dragged her out of the parlor. Angel yanked Duo out of his seat by his braid ("OW! OW! I SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN THE DAMN THING CUT OFF!"), and Groonkbob poked the trembling Heero and Wufei out with the point of her scissors, while Kat was, again, slung over Kusanagi's shoulder (for protection, of course).
"Wait! Wait!"
Everybody turned around and saw Quatre and Dorothy standing in the door of the restaraunt.
Veggie blinked.
"I have to...get my...hair cut...so I'll stay here," said Quatre.
Veggie growled.
"Yes...I'm going to cut...Quatre's hair...don't wait up," Dorothy added, laughing nervously.
Veggie clenched her fists at her side and growled louder.
"Don't come back for us...we'll be fine...all alone! ...Together!" Quatre blinked as he realized that this was the wrong thing to say.
Veggie yelled "FINE! See if I care! I'M NOT INTO BLONDES ANYWAY, YOU CRY-BABY!" She then turned and ran into the forest.

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Part 13---Veggie meets a Youkai (and it's not Kouga)
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Veggie sat down on a tree stump and sighed. Christ, like it matters...it's not like I liked him or anything. Veggie denied fervently to herself that she was in denial, and then realized she was denying the fact that she was. She sighed again.
She jumped when someone behind her began to talk. "What are you doing in my forest?!"
Veggie stood up and brushed herself off nervously. "Um...well...I was..." She looked up, blinked in confusion and then leaned forward. "Are these real?" She rubbed what looked like dog-ears that were protruding from the top of his head.
"Agh! First the villagers, now you! What is it with you mortals?!"
"Why are you furry?" Veggie asked. She stared at him. Wow...he really is cute!
"Why am I furry? Well...I'm not human, am I?"
"I suppose not. What's your name?"
"...Inuyasha?" He blinked. "Wait, wait...I thought I was asking the questions here!"
"I suppose you are."
"Yeah, that's right! So...um..." he scratched the back of his head absentmindedly.
Veggie smiled. "Fleas?" she inquired innocently.
"Wha--NO! I DO NOT HAVE FLEAS!"
"Just check--eh?" Veggie broke off in midsentence, when she heard Wufei and Heero calling her name.
"VEGGGGGIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" yelled Wufei.
"Wuf-fie, I'm over here!" she yelled.
Angel ran up out of the forest and bent over, winded, with Duo close behind her. She straightened and looked past Veggie to Inuyasha. Her eyes clouded over as she jumped on him and began to rub his ears. "Are these real?!"
"YES, DAMNIT, MY EARS ARE REAL! ...This is one of the few times that I've wished it was the new moon."
Wufei and Heero struggled up behind Angel and fixed their eyes on Inuyasha as well. Following Angel's suit, they leaned forward and grabbed his ears. "Are these real?" they asked instantaneously.
"RAAAAA'ARRRRRRR!" yelled Inu. "LEAVE ME BE, YOU FOOLISH MORTALS! THIS IS INJUSTICE! LEAVE ME ALONE!"
Wufei blinked and inclined his head towards Veggie. "I think your friend and I will get along quite well."
Veggie just smiled. "I think so too."
Kusanagi ran up with Kat over his shoulder. Kat was screaming random obscenities and pounding on his back, and yelling to put her down ("YES, KUSI, I'M VERY GLAD YOU ARE HERE TO PROTECT ME. YOU CAN PUT ME DOWN NOW.").
Groonie soon chased Kyra and Fuu into the clearing where everyone else was standing, admiring Inuyasha's fuzzy ears and long hair.
"WOW!" yelled Groonie, approaching Inu as well, "ARE THOSE REAL?!"
Inuyasha smacked a hand to his forehead and sighed. "Gods, what have I gotten myself into...?" He looked at Veggie, Kat, and Angel laughing at each other, several feet away, and smiled. Ah, hell, who cares what I've gotten myself into?
+++Many hours and many beers later+++
The entire party sat around a small campfire in a drunken stupor.
(We're really not promoting use of alcohol, I swear)
Angel was curled up with her head on Duo's shoulder, and they were both fast asleep. Kusanagi had fallen asleep standing against a tree (he was protecting Kat), and Kat had passed out long ago in front of the fire. Wufei and Heero had bored themselves to sleep with long harangues on justice in the world.
Veggie, however, having learned her lesson about alcohol LONG ago when she and Quatre became drunk at the bar, was awake and talking with Inuyasha (who was their look-out). "So..." Veggie yawned, "what do you do out here all alone?"
"Uh...eat food and...kill things and stuff."
"...Sounds thrilling."
"Not really."
Veggie sighed. "Do you know what sarcasm is?"
"Do you know what cynicism is?"
Veggie laughed. "Yes...yes I do."
"Good girl."
"You're pretty smart for a boy that's lived in the woods all his life."
"Yeah, well, I'm smart."
"...I just said that..."
"Maybe I'm not smart, then..."
Veggie yawned. "Oh well--"
Angel turned over and began to mumble. "Duo..."
Inu's eyes went wide as he began to laugh. "Um...I hope she's awake..."
Veggie laughed and shrugged. "You'd better get used to it if you stay around us. This happens every night." Veggie frowned and looked at Inu from across the fire. "You are staying with me--I mean--us, aren't you?"
"Uh..." he tried to look serious, but couldn't help smiling at her. "Yeah...yeah, I will."
Heero and Wufei had awakened and were looking at Veggie and Inuyasha with disgusted expressions scrawled across their drunken faces. "YOU MAKE ME SICK." they said in unison.
Then the two of them collapsed back onto the grass and fell asleep.

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Part 14---Chuck E. Cheese! Inuyasha has a brother? THAT'S A GUY?!
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"Getting...hungry..." groaned Kusanagi and Wufei.
Kusanagi suddenly ran smack into a large building.
"Chuck...E....Cheese...Kat, what in all nine hells is this?"
"Uh...they have pizza here...and games and stuff..."
"Pizza?!" yelled Wufei. "FINALLY, I AM SHOWN JUSTICE IN THIS WORLD! LEAD THE WAY!"
Angel frowned. "Don't you find it suspicious that a real-world children-restaraunt would be in the middle of Inuyasha's forest in Anime land? ...An' it looks brand-spankin' new."
Duo leaned down and squeezed Angel's waist, whispering something in her ear.
"DUO! BAD!" Angel yelled, laughing.
Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "...I don't even wanna know."

:::kat wrote this... oggabooga:::

The group walked skeptically into the building. Kusinagi and Wufei squinted, blinded by the neon lights and flashing colors. "AHH! WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THIS?! ITS BRIGHTER IN HERE THAN IT IS OUTSIDE... AND ITS NOON!" Wufei screamed in horror.
"WHEEEEEEEEE!!!" Veggie Yelled, as she ran off towards the play area.
The rest of the group sat down and waited for a waiter to come and ask them for their order. (Do Chuck E. Cheeses even have waiters? I haven't been there in FRIGGIN FOREVER ... well, they do now =) )
"Hello, I am Ranma Saotome and I'll be your waiter"
"OHHMYSELF! YOU'RE THE RANMA SAOTOME?!?!" Kat screamed in aww.
"Uhh... yes?" He said, in confusion.
"I LOVE YOU. YOU ARE THE COOLEST PERSON TO EVER LIVE!" Kat screamed.
"What about mee?" asked Kusanagi.
"Ohh, shaddup Kusi, Ranma could kick your ass any day of the week."
"Well... I LIKE YOU." Ranma said, smiling at Kat.
Kat Smiled back, with BIG sparkly eyes.
This made Kusanagi VERY angery.
"WHY YOU.." Kusanagi's Face Reddened, but he was suddenly cut off by a very tall woman with long white hair ... or is she a he?
"Well, if it isn't my dear, dear little brother..." he/she said.
"Sesshou-maru..." Inuyasha said with a glare, "What are you doing here?"
"Well, I was just taking my dear friend Rin out to lunch, and she suggested this. It does seem quite childish...which could suggest why you're here," Sesshou said with an evil, evil grin.
"Uh..." Angel leaned across the table, "Who is she?"
"HE! I AM A BOY! GODDAMMIT I AM A BOY YOU INSIGNIFICANT FOOL!" Sessho screamed.
"If I'm so insignificant than why are you screaming at me for a little...mistake?" Angel asked innocently.
"Shaddup you." He glared.
"Everybody, this is my big brother Sessho-maru."
Angel blinked as she examined Sessho. What the hell...? "What are you wearing?! YOU LOOK LIKE A WOMAN!" she fell out of Duo's lap laughing.
"Eh?" Duo looked down at the floor where Angel was currently stationed, rolling around in a giggle fit. He glanced up at Sessho, and realized he was wearing an Alice in Wonderland-type outfit. He also had a bright blue bow in his hair. This was too much for Duo, and collapsed onto the ground next to Angel and proceeded to roll around as well.
"What?! WHAT IS IT?!" Sesshomaru yelled.
Kat put a hand to her mouth to stifle a laugh. "Nothing, Sesshie...it's just that...well...you look like a girl!"
Ranma stiffened. "Is that...bad? I mean...not that it matters...to me...just...um..."
"IT'S JUST THAT HE IS A GIRL!" Sessho screamed. "I AM NO MORE A GIRL THAN THIS BRAIDED HUMAN!" he pointed at Duo.
"But Sesshie...I am a girl," Duo said in his best Kyra-impersonation voice.
"I'm the guy, dumbass," Kyra said in her best Duo-impersonation voice.
"But...but...AHHHHHH!" Sesshomaru yelled, grabbing Rin (who was dressed in a rabbit outfit) and running out of the Chuck E. Cheese's.
"WE'RE LATE! WE'RE LATE! FOR A VERY IMPORTANT DATE!" Rin giggled as they exited.
Inuyasha sighed. "Well, that's my half-brother for ya..."
Veggie blinked. "He's a little...eccentric...and rather special."
Inuyasha laughed nervously and rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah, well...it runs in that side of the family..."
Just then, Veggie asked, "Hey! where's Wufei?"
Before any of the others could reply there came a voice from the stage.
"Aaaaaaand now it's the star of the evening! The young new singing sensation, Chang Wufei!"
"Since when does Chuck E. Cheese's have a stage?" Kat asked.
"This is the new and improved Chuck E. Cheese. After all, they have me!" Ranma replied.
"WOW! Wufei must still be drunk...or this place has brainwashed him so he will become their evil pawn and rule the world..." Groonie shouted into Kusanagi's ear.
"Nah, he's just still drunk."
"QUICK!" Angel screamed, "SOMEONE GET THE RECORDER SO WE CAN TAPE THIS AND LAUGH AT WUFEI LATER, TOO!"
"Spandex is NOT his thing..." said Heero as he looked at Wufei's costume.
"We all know thie injustice of this," began Wufei. "At me singing and you listening. But now let us put that injustice aside and think of another one. I'm going to sing a song about my eyebrows. You may be thinking this is injustice. You came here to eat pizza and now there's some kid singing about his eyebrows. Mind you I am NOT Jackie Chan, and this is not my song, but hell, you can still eat and listen at the same time. So without futher ado, here's my song." As then intro music began, Wufei continued to address the audience. "Ready? Okay. S-E-X-X-Y. More than enough. Around the clock with nobody else, S-E-X-X-Y....."
"WHAT?!" Heero's jaw dropped. "What's he been drinking?! He didn't get into any of that Wild Turkey that Zechs left, did he?
"Whow...But why just his eyebrows? I mean, if it was me, I would be singing about all of me..." Duo babbled on.
"Yeah, why just his eyebrows? I'm agreeing with Duo for once...wow." Kyra stuttered.


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