| OSTARA! |
| March 20th, Sunday....Ostara! Welcome Spring! Man have I missed you! We did a small ritual last night, haven't done anything yet today. My son is grumpy (probably from staying up late) and not in the right frame of mind ::sigh:: Last night was interesting to say the least. I've cross posted my LJ posting, so those of you who read it there, don't need to (or want to I'm sure!) read it again. You can skip down to the picture of Alan. My husband lit a fire for us outside last night and we stayed out from 8:30 to 12:30. Our son went out for about an hour with us, and he helped me say a "Welcome Spring" poem to the God & Goddess. My husband got quit toasty last night, and I don't mean from the fire. He talked to me from the heart, as all inebriated souls do. He told me that he loved me and that he couldn't see himself with anyone else. I thought to myself, "I think by all the oogling he does at other women he sees himself with others all the freakin' time." As if reading my thoughts he told me that he does all that "oogling" to aggravate me (for the fun of it). I told him he needed to find a new hobby, but then shut my mouth because when people are drunk and talking to you "from the heart", it's best done if you sit and listen without interruption. He told me that the reason we didn't get along sometimes was basically because we were so much alike. He says I am the female version of him. So I said, "Oh, well, you're an ass" and he looked at me, smiled and said, "Yes...yes I am." SO that means I'm an ass too then >:/ Oh well...I guess I can be. We both have really strong personalities and are bull-headed. He thinks he's always right, I think I'm always right...But in a positive light, we have basicaly the same beliefs and ideals, and we have alot in common in how we like to spend our free time. He went on for about an hour telling me how much he loves me and how he wants our lives to be and blah, blah, blah. I'm not "blahing" because it was boring or un-important. It was actually the best conversation we've ever had (I cried several times), but I just don't think you would want to hear every last detail. We have lots of plans, and I hope that we succeed with all of them. First we have to "fix" our son. He's totally bonkers. Right now he is singing a song to himself, "I hate my life, I wish I was dead, I hate my life, I wish I was dead.." over and over again. I have learned to tune it out because it upsets me greatly and that is why he does it. Second we have to fix the house. New carpet, new paint! His mother has even offered to extend the whole back of the house for us (son's room, dining room, kitchen, laundry room, master bath)doubling the room sizes! Then we are going to put a new deck on the back. Hopefully soon we can finish the basement as well. Third we have to go to Scotland. We are going to Stirling in central Scotland. If we like it, we may move back over there in a few years. We are already looking at police and nursing boards for that area. He doesn't want to do anything right now though because his parents are getting older and he wants us to look after them first, and I agreed. His father is 74 and his mother is 66...so it will be a few years at least. But it gives me something to look forward too. Not that I'm wanting anything to my in-laws, they are WONDERFUL people and I care about them alot (I just wanted to clarify because as I re-read that it didn't sound...quite...right). And HEY....Alan Rickman is in Scotland all the time! WOOT! Anyway, it appears things are on the up and up for the family life, which is such a relief because I really had just about given up hope. I have decided that my son is going to spend two weeks with his "father" wheather he wants to or not because MOMMA needs a break. It makes me a nervous wreck just thinking about it, but I have made my decision and am sticking to it. I just hope for the short time he is up there he doesn't learn to cuss like a sailor, smoke, drink, steal, smoke pot or commit any felonies. No, I didn't know he was a felon when I met him...he also didn't drink or smoke pot at that time. He did however have a filthy mouth and smoked. I hate ciggies. He was a mistake. He was my "sex" after a year of not having any while going through a divorce, and while the sex was AWESOME....everything else about him was wrong, wrong, wrong. Anway, enought about him for now. I can complain about him another day. Today is a good day, and I want to keep it that way. I shall sit and stare at Alan....ahhhhhhhhhhh! )0( |
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