My Life of Love
Today is 26 October 2003, dating back 4 months ago to 26 June 2003, 1 day after I return from my NPCC Sec 2 Adventure Camp. I received an email from my dearest stead. The email topic was "Hello...it's not a chain letter...pls read" so I hurried to open it to see what it was all about. To my disgust, it was a letter of BREAK-UP. It was clear to me that, this relationship of almost 2yrs is going to end just right here in this mail. With the sudden emtional change at that very point of time, I wasn't sure what I should type to reply her. My mind was in total darkness. Without thinking further, I reply to her agreeing to break-up with her, saying sorry for breaking her heart & wishing her in finding a better guy than me.
After breaking I told myself that I can easily forget her but till now I have not done so. I could say, I have utterly fail to FORGET her. It was hard for me to just forget of all those loving memories she had gave me. Every now & then, I would still dream of her staying by my side, smiling at me.
4 months and now I am in SP studying, everytime I see a couple holding hands, doing things together and etc ....it reminds me of her when we are togther. I remember that when we are together in secondary school, during recess, I would always buy her favourite fruits and a cup of drink waiting for her to come right away after finishing her food. Then, we would sit on the bench outside NPCC room happily chatting away. She would feed me with fruits and I would share the drink with her. When recess time is up, we would slowly stroll up to the hall to assemble. After school, I would meet her up for lunch and later accompany her back home if I could make it.
On the way home, holding hands and spending the day together makes me feel unstress from school work or whatever stress. Eveything was so great and I love to have this feeling again. Now whenever, I walked past her block, I would peeped at her kitchen window or room window hoping she would appear for a minute or so. But always the chances of seeing her is 0%. Apart from just peeping from the bottom of her house, I would quielty walked down her house's corridor again hoping to see her when her door is open but still no hope. But when I got a chance to see her, I would try all my best to avoid seeing her. My heart tells me to take a look at her but my mind holds back the action. So all I would do in the end, is take a little peep at her back.
All I really want from her was her care, love and understanding. IS that difficult to fulfil?
I wish u all the best with ur bf......... |
