(The scene opens up inside a mock courtroom. We see Scott "The Boy" Hellings at the front of the court, pacing back and forth. On the "witness stand" is noneother than the new President of Rampage World Wrestling, Stu Osbourne, also known as Stupac. Hellings continues to pace and then suddenly stops and looks Stu in the eyes.)

HELLINGS-
"Look, I'm only going to ask you once more."

STUPAC-
"Why exactly am I here?"

HELLINGS-
"Why are you here? Because I want answers and I think I deserve them!"

STUPAC-
"You think you deserve it? I maintain law and order in the RWW and I think I deserve some respect dammit! So don't you talk to me about what you deserve!"

HELLINGS-
"I want answers!"

STUPAC-
"What is you really want?"

HELLINGS-
"I want the truth!"

STUPAC-
"YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

HELLINGS-
"Did you or did you not order the rematch?"

STUPAC-
"You goddamn right I did!"

(Suddenly, there is silence. And then the two friends burst out laughing.)

HELLINGS-
"That was great dude. Thanks a lot, I always wanted to do that!"

STUPAC-
"Anytime man."

HELLINGS-
"You know, I don't understand. Bruce talks about conspiracies and and injustcies here in Rampage World Wrestling. The only injustice around here is that he is still on TV boring all my fans, all my Boy Scouts!"

STUPAC-
"No doubt. The guy is an idiot."

HELLINGS-
"Of course he is! You had every right to order a rematch! You're the boss!"

STUPAC-
"That's right and Don't Cross the Boss!"

HELLINGS-
"What the HELLings does that have to do with anything?"

STUPAC-
"Nothing really. Just trying out my new catchphrase. You like it?"

HELLINGS-
"It's not bad. It works for you. You gonna put that on a t-shirt or something?"

STUPAC-
"I'm thinking so."

HELLINGS-
"I'll put it on my Christmas list. Anyway, you had every right to order the rematch whether an injustice was done or not! There are boxing rematches all the time, even if there was a clean finish to the bout! So why not a rematch for the RWW Undisputed Title? It's a smart business decision, it will increase PPV buyrates!"

STUPAC-
"Bruce is intimidated by you. He is afraid of you. He realises he doesn't take you seriously enough and he knows that he can't beat you."

HELLINGS-
"You're absolutely correct, as usual, my friend. Bruce has apparently forgot what my nickname (making quotation marks with his fingers) 'The Boy' means. I got that nickname by being the youngest person to be training in the Hart Dungeon just a few years ago. But that nickname was supposed to be an insult. All the other wrestlers training there thought I had no chance of succeeding. So you know what I did?"

STUPAC-
"Yes but tell me anyway. You're on a roll here."

HELLINGS-
"You think so? I'm not trying too hard?"

STUPAC-
"You're doing great. Continue."

HELLINGS-
"Anyway...you know what I did? I trained harder than everybody else. And before long I was the best wrestler training there at the time! I was unstoppable! Suddenly, The Boy had become The Man! But I chose to keep my old nickname, just to remind my peers how their ignorace made me into a better wrestler. And the same thing is going to happen to Bruce. He is going to walk into Toronto thinking that I won't be a challenge, but I will beat him! Deep down inside he knows I am better than him, but he doesn't want to admit it. But that will prove to be a fatal error for BDB and I will walk out of BattleLines as the new RWW Undisputed Champion! I know it, you know it, the whole damn world knows it!"

STUPAC-
"Yeah and besides, you are younger, quicker and stronger than he is."

HELLINGS-
"Definitely. I am like 73 years younger than Bruce is! I swear he was wrestling in the Garden of Eden! Even if he was good back in the day, he is old and pathetic these days. He should really just quit before he has a stroke in the middle of the ring!"

STUPAC-
"You know I was watching an interview with the Geriatric One the other day and he was saying something that I found quite disturbing."

HELLINGS-
"Oh yeah? Like what?"

STUPAC-
"Something to do with The Boy and dildos. Dude, why is he talking about you and dildos?"

HELLINGS-
"You know something, I would rather not know. Unless..."

STUPAC-
"Stop right there!"

HELLINGS-
"No, it's nothing. I was just thinking that maybe he was talking about all my great friends in Dildo, Newfoundland. You think that is what he was talking about?"

STUPAC-
"I really hope so. There is a place in Canada actually called Dildo?"

HELLINGS-
"Yeah, there is even a place called Uren, Saskatchewan."

STUPAC-
"Urine?"

HELLINGS-
"No, Uren. You know, YOU'RE IN, Saskatchewan. Get it?"

STUPAC-
"I hate you."

HELLINGS-
"No problem."

STUPAC-
"So how great is it going to feel to win the Title from Bruce in front of all your fans in your home country of Canada? That's gotta be pretty sweet!"

HELLINGS-
"It sure is. A few thousand of my Boy Scouts will be cheering me on to victory. I love it."

STUPAC-
"You know he made a few disparaging remarks about Canada the other day dude. He was saying what a crappy country it was and how the only two good things to come out of it was hockey and Trish Stratus."

HELLINGS-
"What? How can he say that? Canada rules! Canada has given so much else to the rest of the world! We have given our beer, our national sport of hockey...which we beat American in. Score!"

STUPAC-
"Hey now, watch yourself."

HELLINGS-
"Sorry, couldn't resist. Canada is a great country that has given so much. A Canadian discovered insulin you know. And Canada has given so much to culture and entertainment. Canada is the home of the world-famous Cirque de Solei, a Canadian by the name of Michael Oondaatje gave the novel 'The English Patient.' And comedians Mike Meyers and Jim Carrey are Canadian. Musically, we have had tons of great acts. From The Guess Who to Nickelback."

STUPAC-
"And Celine Dion. Don't forget her, she's Canadian."

HELLINGS-
"I would like to forget Celine Dion, Stu."

STUPAC-
"We all would."

HELLINGS-
"But you know something? For every Celine Dion we give the rest of the world a Pam Anderson! Now that's a Canadian exchange rate that is worthwhile!"

STUPAC-
"Wow, Canada rules!"

(Stu and The Boy exchange a high five.)

HELLINGS-
"And Bruce talks about Canada and our involvement in wars being almost non-existant? I'll have Bruce know that we are were in both of the World Wars before America was. And in WWI, Canada had four of the top twelve flying aces-more than Britain, France and Germany had. We also saw action in battles at Ypres, Somme, Passchendaele and Vimy Ridge! In WWII, Canada was the most successful country in carrying out their mission objectives on D-Day! We were there in Korea, we were there in Vietnam and we were there in The Gulf War! Both of my grandfathers fought in WWII Bruce, and now it seems like I'm going to be carrying on that tradition. Because you and I will be going to war, so-to-speak this Sunday at the aptly named BattleLines. And don't go thinking you can beat me Bruce. I own you. In fact....do you like my new shoes Stu?"

STUPAC-
"What? Uh, yeah, I guess. Why?"

HELLINGS-
"Because these shoes are made for kicking ass and that is EXACLTY what they are going to at BattleLines! Bruce can claim to be the greatest technical wrestler in the RWW today, but as everybody knows, I can outwrestle him, I can outpower him, I can outsmart him and, quite frankly, I can outdress him!"

STUPAC-
"You know Scotty, you oughta be careful. I mean, you don't want to piss Bruce off. After all, he is the only true legend in Rampage World Wrestling. He is Big Daddy Bruce-THE ICON!"

HELLINGS-
"You're kidding, right?"

STUPAC-
"Yeah, I was having a tough time keeping a straight face."

HELLINGS-
"You did good. I almost had to smack you there."

STUPAC-
"Don't worry, I'm not as senile as Bruce is."

HELLINGS-
"Senility doesn't even begin to describe Bruce. The man is out of control and after Sunday, I am gonna knock him down a peg. Because I may not claim to be an icon or a legend like Bruce. But I do make one claim and that is that I am The Boy and that means I am The Best!"

STUPAC-
"Yeah and Don't Cross the Boss!"

HELLINGS-
"Okay, seriously? You need to stop that."

STUPAC-
"Sorry. It just felt right with your catchphrase there, I thought I would fit mine in."

HELLINGS-
"Whatever. You know something? For a so-called icon, Bruce sure hasn't done much here. I mean, sure he has won ten world titles or whatever he thinks it is, but the fact is he has only won it ONCE here in Rampage World Wrestling! And look at the huge gap between his title reigns! Perhaps we could somehow get a wayback machine and travel back in time to a point in human history when Bruce was still considered a good wrestler, or otherwise I would guarantee that his days as a champion are numbered."

STUPAC-
"Was there ever a time when Bruce was good?"

HELLINGS-
"Not sure. I think it's all just a myth really. You know, something that hasn't been proven to be correct, but everyone just assumes it is for the sake of argument?"

STUPAC-
"Oh, you mean like Britney Spears' virginity?"

HELLINGS-
"Yeah, something like that."

STUPAC-
"You know, I think Bruce is just jealous of you. He's like ninety and he has only ever won the RWW Title once. And after Sunday you will be like me, a two-time champion."

HELLINGS-
"Of course he's jealous! If I were him, I would want to be me too. But unfortunately, that isn't a possibilty. At BattleLines I will surpass Big Daddy Bruce and show the whole world that I am that much better than him. I don't take pride in beating an older man, but he brought this upon himself."

STUPAC-
"You said it. Hey, can we get outta here man? I could really go for some ice cream."

HELLINGS-
"Yeah, I guess I said everything I need to say. Besides, we better get out of here before the copyright infringment people come after us for ripping off 'A Few Good Men.' "

STUPAC-
"Sounds good to me."

(The two get and walk out of the mock courtroom. The scene ends and the camera fades to black.)