Rum03text03

Rumble 2003

BACK TO ROUNDS 1 - 4       BACK TO ROUNDS 5 - 7

ROUND 8

Brian Wrote:
John Madden: That flash of light brought another familiar contestant. It is Inigo Montoya, of Princess Bride Fame! Lets do a quick run down of his stats in these events! In the first tournament he managed the defeat of Chaos, (the original Final Fantasy bad guy), and survived to the Great 8 before being killed by Bavmorda. Since then he hasn't done so hot.
Brian: Yes in the First Rumble he had his spine ripped out by the Predator, less than 5 minutes after arriving. And in the second tournament he was turned to stone by Medusa's head, controlled by Perseus, in the first round.
John: Yes, but perhaps he may see a return to his former greatness today.
Brian: Not likely, he appeared between the Gholam and Shelob.
John: Poor guy, I guess he's as good as written off then. Yep, the Gholam broke both of his arms and kicked him toward Shelob who trussed him up and began drinking his fluids. Yuck.
Brian: Yuck is right. Spiderman saw this instant carnage and decided that the huge spider was not an ally, nor a foe he wanted to attack alone, yet at least. He wisely beat a hasty retreat.
John: Meanwhile, the Skywalkers have just seen the Boggart (any relation to Humphrey?) dressed as Emperor Palpatine. Luke and Leia cower for just a moment over their nearly helpless father. Amidala however leaps to her feet and runs laughing to the Boggart. It is thoroughly confused as to how to scare two people with the image of a friend of two others present! The moment of confusion was it's last however as the laughing Amidala says "what a great reunion this is! How great to see you Chancellor!" and hugs the Boggart who then dissolves, thoroughly confusing the four Skywalkers each in different ways.
Brian: Don't forget about Superman, Mali-neto, Perrin and Faile! Mali-neto growls angrily (it seems receiving Malissant and resting for nearly half an hour has revived him somewhat) and blasts a spurt of Malice at the trio of heroes. Superman plants his feet and blazons the "S" on his chest to receive the blast. It sends Superman sprawling into Perrin and Faile, alive but drained. Mali-neto laughs and twirls his hands for a second blast. Perrin bravely steps up and readies his axe. Little does he know that the blow would destroy him much more than it hurt the man of Steel. Fortunately Mali-neto never gets to fire his spurt of death. Suddenly a gout of webbing shoots out and envelops Mali-neto, who is then flipped out the window. Spiderman drops from the ceiling and looks out the window, only to have the entire thing ripped out around him. It seems the Webbing only held Mali-neto for a moment and now he has used his magnetic powers to rip the window out, Spidey with it. Well, Spidey doesn't go far, it was a sub-basement window after all, besides he slings onto a flagpole jutting out from the third floor, and begins swinging around the building, Mali-neto chases him, and Superman struggles to his feet and flies out the window after Mali-neto!

(So Shelob and the Gholam are still in the lowest sub-basement, feasting on Inigo remains, Spidey, Mali-neto, and Superman are flying/swinging around the building outside, the 4 Skywalkers are on the 3rd floor below ground in a hallway, as are Perrin and Faile.)

Mark Wrote:
Mark: Well, Malissant is powerful enough on his own. But coupled with Magneto's natural abilities, he is nearly unstoppable! (Indeed, I'm not sure, but I think he is now invincible to anyone but RJ--Right?)
Ghost of J.R.R. Tolkien: But if there's one person who can overcome that threat, its--
Brian: Hey! Didn't you already get booted out?
Tolkien: Oh, Come now! You let Fat Boy come back.
George Lucas: Hey!
Brian: All right, fine. But you're on probation too.
Tolkien: That's just fine young man. As I was saying, Mali-neto: You've been asking for him, and now you've got him. Ladies and Gentlemen, The Fantastic Rumble Champion, Gandalf the White! He appears in a flash of light carrying his staff and wielding Glamdring the Foe-Hammer. Malissant spots him almost immediately and�
Malissant: You! You call yourself a champion?
Tolkien: Malissant turns his attention away from those Spider- and Super-gentlemen and fires a cone of dark horror at Gandalf. But behold! Gandalf raises his staff and the cone of Malice is turned aside. "I have faced mightier foes than you, Spawn of Kryton. You are but a pale shadow of Sauron's power."
Mark: Hey!
Tolkien: Don't let that get you down, son. Your work shows promise.
Mark: Oh. Well, I guess that's okay then. Meanwhile, Superman is looking from Gandalf to Mali-neto with an odd look on his face. "Like, and yet unlike," he murmurs. Spiderman, however has a more direct way of showing his observation. While Malissant is distracted, he fires a spray of webbing, which wraps around his wrists, pinning them together. Malissant howls in rage and pulls against the web, but Spiderman hangs on--he is at least physically stronger than Magneto.
Tolkien: But Magneto's powers are not chiefly physical. Using his mutant power, he seizes Glamdring from Gandalf's hand and makes it fly through the air to sever Spiderman's silk, freeing the mutant's hands and sending Spiderman plummeting to the ground.
Mark: But he's not done there. With a howl of rage, Malissant erupts in black fire, blasting a wave of Enmity at Spiderman. He is engulfed in flame and hits the sidewalk beside Gandalf with a sick thump.
Stan Lee: Noooo! Not Ol' Web-head!
Mark: Malissant sneers and looks at Gandalf. "You're next, old man!" He yells, and the dark wave strikes out at Gandalf. The champion parries with his own blast of power, and soon there is a sorcerous battle raging between Gandalf and Mali-neto. Superman, powerful as he is, thinks it wiser to retreat and let these two sort things out themselves. He perches on the roof, waiting for a new opponent.
George Lucas: Meanwhile, the important people are all underground, looking warily at Perrin and Faile. The wheel-of-timers can see they are horribly outclassed, and turn tail and run down a nearby stairwell. The Skywalkers follow, but suddenly Anakin stops and stands still. "I sense a tremor in the force," he says. "Yes," says Luke. "I do too. There is something powerfully evil down there."
Tolkien: There sure is, Flanneled One. Perrin and Faile have just run into Shelob the great. An immense spidery monster so horrifying that it has never been shown in film or cartoon.
Peter Jackson: Well, Shelob will eventually show up in Return of the King, but--
Tolkien: Don't you even talk to me, you lousy pirating hack! I was rolling over in my grave after that Two Towers film of yours.
Peter: But, I really am a fan--
Tolkien: You wrecked Faramir! Not to mention making the Ents look like bumbling fools, Theoden's possession, and the terrible way you're handling Arwen.
Lucas: And people have the audacity to compare you to me! You're not even working with original material!
Tolkien: You're butchering the original material!
(Lucas and Tolkien pause for a moment, a bit flummoxed to see they agree on something)
Tolkien: Anyway, Shelob and Gollum--Uh, I mean the Gholam--Have run into Perrin and Faile. Perrin tries to defend them both with his axe, but the Gholam bats him aside like a bug, and Shelob strikes, stinging Faile. She collapses with a howl.
Mark: And Perrin is distraught! He leaps to his feet to avenge her as Shelob begins wrapping her body in silk. The Gholam slugs Perrin in the face, breaking his nose. The monster towers over the Wolfbrother, about to kill him and drink his fluids,
George Lucas: When suddenly, two holes explode out of either side of the creature's chest! It seems neither Leia nor her mother have any qualms about shooting a monster in the back. And neither of them misses. (Note: It has already been established by Riddik that Blaster type weapons will hurt the Gholam)
Tolkien: But now, Shelob has noticed the Skywalkers, and moves to attack them.
Lucas: Anakin lights his lightsaber. "Careful, father," says Luke. "I've fought this creature before, and she's pretty tough." Anakin acknowledges with a weary nod--He's been through an awful lot in this rumble already. Leia ignites her lightsaber too, and Padme raises her blaster. The queen of the spiders advances on the Skywalkers, and another competitor is coming!

(So, Superman is on the roof, watching Gandalf and Mali-neto battle near the ground floor. Shelob and the four Skywalkers are in the bottom sub-basement, near the subway stop. Perrin is nearby, sobbing inconsolably, and Faile (who is NOT dead) is stunned with spider poison and half-wrapped in webbing, directly UNDER Shelob's immense abdomen)

Cindy Wrote:
Cindy: Well, well, things are pretty messy, aren't they? Largely thanks to you two.
Lucas and Tolkien: You're welcome!
Cindy: Anyway, the next contestant has nothing to do with either of your worlds, so maybe you'll be quiet for a bit. It's Doctor Strange, master of the mystic arts!
Stan Lee: Ah! Another marvelous Marvelite!
Cindy: Yes, yes, and a rather unusual comic book hero, whose power comes from the netherworlds rather than from a strong body. Appearing near the massive spider, he immediately senses its evil and begins to attack it with a mighty force. "By the dread Vishanti!" he cries, "I shall vanquish your dark power!" Shelob is thrown to the ground, having not expected powers such as these.
Tolkien: Of course, that doesn't last long, not with a creature who has roamed Middle-Earth nearly since the beginnings of time!
Cindy: The spider is shaken, though, and it gives Leia and Anakin a chance to attack with their lightsabers, which - sorry, Tolkien - do bring harm to Shelob.
Lucas: Hah!
Cindy: The light itself also distracts the giant spider, and Dr. Strange furthers the distraction by summoning a few netherworldly beings who hover around Shelob with the most annoying persistence. And now Perrin, whose grief has given way to rage, joins the fight. With all this against her, how can Shelob prevail?
Tolkien: Humph. Well, I think she could.
Lucas: Hey, you had a bunch of little midgets fight her.
Tolkien: But they didn't KILL her! Oh, well.
Cindy: One final thrust of Leia's saber, and the spider is vanquished! Perrin, meanwhile, has returned to his apparently dead wife, still grief-stricken, and the Skywalkers stand around a bit awkwardly. Finally Padm� offers her help, being a bit of a humanitarian and all, and Leia contributes with a bit of Jedi healing (sure, why not?). They'll soon discover Faile is rescusitatable. Dr. Strange sends back his summonings and leaves in search of more evil to vanquish, which means he'll be coming upon Gandalf and Mal-neto any minute.
Tolkien: And this is where my creation truly prevails! Watch as he blocks every blow from this dark creature, sending back attacks that will bring his foe to his knees at any moment . . . any moment now . . . hmmm . . .
Cindy: Well, Malissant in Magneto's body is no slouch himself, you know. Gandalf does seem to have the upper hand, but he's getting tired. Of course, Magneto's body is old and may wear out sooner, but he just had a nice long rest and Malissant doesn't soon tire. Meanwhile, Superman is flying back down around the edge of the battle, reluctant to enter but seeing the good guy in need. And someone else is coming!

(So the Skywalkers are helping Perrin in recovering his wife from Shelob's attack, and Dr. Strange and Superman are both heading for the dueling Gandalf and Mal-neto)

Robert Wrote:
FLASH!
Yoda: Interesting this is, hmm.
Robert: What is it Master Yoda?
Yoda: I sense a disturbance in the Force: fear, anger, the Dark Side this is.
Robert: That's for sure, Carnage (one of Spiderman's nemesis's) has appeared. He's quite mad that someone has already killed Spiderman too. He appeared on the street, right next to the webslinger's corpse. Oh well, he'd just have to find someone else to kill, maim, mutilate or otherwise destroy.
Yoda: Busy the Skywalkers are, no fighting will they do.
Robert: Correct again, Master Yoda. The Skywalkers are resting up in the deep basement and are helping Faile out of the webbing. She is very weak and only barely conscious. Perrin has sworn not to ever leave her side again and to not let her be anywhere near harm's way. Anakin, recently free of the Dark Shehap, has a joyous time with his whole family. There is so much catching up to do, and they have so little time before something is bound to interrupt them again.
Yoda: Light and Dark, balanced they are. Equally matched Gandalf and Mali-neto are. Light shall triumph as friends gather.
Robert: Superman and Dr. Strange are about to come across Gandalf and Mali-neto. Gandalf can sense that friends are near. He is conserving his strength as best he can so he can overwhelm the Dark Shehap/evil mutant when his prospective allies show up. Mali-neto can also tell that do-gooders are coming and hopes to overwhelm Gandalf before they get there so they can't team up on him. Nothing conclusive yet, but more rumbling is likely to happen soon.

(So, Perrin, Luke, Leia, Anakin, and Padme are helping Faile to recover from the wounds she received from Shelob. Gandalf and Mali-neto are in the middle of a fierce wizard's duel. Superman and Dr. Strange are closing in on that location. Carnage is getting mad that he can't find anything nearby to hurt.)

RJ Wrote:
FLASH
RJ: The Borg is here!
Data: That is correct. The Collective is a very powerful enemy in my reality. I have had my run-ins with them before--this one is called 9 of 11 (RJ's note: I thought to add that in to pay tribute at this time of year)
RJ: So 9 of 11 has appeared directly in front of Superman, and startles the hero
Data: Yes, the Man of Steel flies up and takes a wary look at this new foe.
9 of 11: Resistance is Futile! (He shoots his gun repeatedly at Superman)
RJ: Oh man! Superman thinking that it is a normal gun lets the bullets bounce off--but remember that the Borg can adapt. Sensing that the blasts are having no effect on this flying guy, they have adapted and are now shooting Kryptonite bullets.
Data: Superman falls from the sky as the Kryptonite enters his assimilated body. He is almost as the Queen now--a super-Borg.
RJ: But you must remember Data that the Borg are not unstoppable--Superman technically died with the Kryptonite--right now he is only part of the Collective. Meanwhile, Dr Strange has arrived and knows that the Borg is certainly evil and all of the rumble has attracted Carnage as well. He is even more angry that he did not get to knock off his old nemesis.
Data: Carnage and Dr Strange start to battle the Borg--dodging bullets and using their magical/super powers to destroy the two members of the Collective.
RJ: After a few tense moments, the Borg are dead--thanks to Dr Strange. Carnage having a feeling that his life was in danger with this netherworld power nearby, leaves.
Data: The wizard battle has continued on as one would expect--these two are a fair match: Malissant using his powers and those of his host Magneto are very even with those of the White Wizard, Gandalf.
RJ: Meanwhile, the Skywalkers have decided to go and help the good they sense through the Force (namely Gandalf)--but only after they attended to Perrin and the injured Faile in the destroyed Food Court, but they will not be alone--Carnage is headed that way with Dr Strange following and here comes another competitor!

(SO, Gandalf and Magneto fight with the Skywalkers on the way, Perrin and Faile are in the FC with Carnage and Dr Strange on the way)

ROUND 9

Brian Wrote:
Tolkien: Gandalf looks over Mali-neto's shoulder and sees the Skywalker family exit the lobby. He then shouts, "Let the Anti-Malissant League begin again! The Skywalkers look at him and, raising their weapons, charge toward the two wizards. Suddenly Leia screams and falls to the ground. The rest of the family stops to look at her. A dagger protrudes from her back inches below the neck. Suddenly they hear laughing! Anakin and Luke look around then they spot a tall man in a dark cloak over black armor. He leaps from the 8th floor window and crashes against the ground. Anakin mutters, "That was pointless?!" They turn back to Leia when they here Padme announce, "She's dead!"
Luke points out the obvious "That guy must have killed her before he leaped to his death."
Bugs Bunny: They must be too sad about Leia to notice that that fella ain't dead.
"THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE! NOW YOU DIE!!" Yells the Kurgan.
Gorilla Monsoon: Before even Jedi in reflexes can react the Kurgan swings his great broad sword and severs Luke's right hand.
Bobby the Brain Heenan: Unlike a lightsaber cut, this wound is not cauterized and Luke is bleeding badly. Anakin attacks in great anger. However the Kurgan doesn't raise his sword to block the blow but lifts a shield, encrusted in diamonds.
Mark: Rygara's lightsaber proof shield!
Bobby: Yes the blade reflects off and Anakin is grounded by a kick to the side from the Kurgan. Padme fires her blaster and the Kurgan blocks that with the shield too, however, the blast has much more momentum and the Kurgan goes flying into the lobby. Gandalf sees that no help is imminently forthcoming, and redoubles his attack on the tired mutant/ evil Shehap.
And there is another flash of light.

(So, Perrin and Faile are getting a light snack in the food court, where Carnage is about to attack them, while Dr. Strange is coming up behind them. Gandalf and Mali-neto are still going at it outside the lobby. Padme and Anakin are trying to tend to Luke who is bleeding to death, while the Kurgan brushes off the dust and prepares to attack again.)

Mark Wrote:
Dr. Seuss: Perrin says, "Sit down, take a rest from the action," But Faile is chafing under her husband's protection.
To her feet she does leap, shouting, "I can't just relax! While others endure these rumbling attacks!"
But all of a sudden, the battle and gore, Is carried straight to them, with a flash and a roar.
A huge flash of light lights up the food court, And reveals a new enemy of a familiar sort.
At least as tall as a man on a horse, And almost as broad (though not quite so, of course),
He wears a spiked helmet, and carries a mace, With a loud roaring voice and a wide ugly face,
'Tis the Ogre Champion of Grimorg, and now heads will roll! (Those who haven't played BattleMasters, think of the Moria Troll.)
He swings his huge club, to crush the cute couple, But Perrin's too quick, and his wife is too subtle.
They leap to the side, and pull out their weapons. Since they wanted a fight, it's a fight they'll be gettin'.
And Carnage was planning the couple to attack. But instead, the weird symbiote is struck in the back.
Dr. Strange finds the creature both evil and gory, (and somewhat familiar, as their from the same stories)
And so, I will leave them to battle without my insights. For, to tell the truth, I don't know how either one fights.
But the Skywalkers, I know, so we'll head outside fast, And listen to Luke while he whispers his last.
For though Anakin tries to save the young Jedi Knight, Luke's lost too much blood, and his skin has turned white.
"Oh, father," he says, looking deep in his eyes, "Be true to your self!" Then the poor Jedi dies.
In Anakin's arms, his son now lies still, And a few feet away, his daughter was killed.
He shakes his head sadly, trying not to believe, It is too soon since he knew him! Too early to grieve!
He touches Luke's wrist, and to his surprise, Finds the remains of his prosthetic inside.
Why, Luke had a robot hand, just like his Dad! Some cruel-hearted sith lord had cut it off when he was mad!
Tears fall on his cheeks, as the Padawan mourns, Then he stares at the Kurgan. This shall not be bourn!
There stands the immortal, with his sword and his shield, Still fighting with Padme, his wounds all are healed!
The pain in Anakin's eyes turns to hate. The Immortal Kurgan has sealed his own fate.
A lightsaber ignites, the Kurgan glances back, And with a howl of revenge, the Jedi attacks!
The melee is fierce, from both the blood flows, But the Immortal Kurgan's no match for his foe.
For neither Rygara's shield, nor his long deathless age, Can match with the fire of the Chosen One's rage.
The Jedi warrior lashes out with the force, And the Immortal flees backward, as if kicked by a horse.
Kurgan leaps to his feet, but the Jedi is bolder, The lightsaber flashes between his head and his shoulders.
Kurgan's sword hits the ground, cloven in twain, And there stands the Chosen One, over the slain.
Anakin turns from the carnage, and looks at his wife, But her eyes dance with horror, and sickness, and strife.
"Padme?" he says slowly, afraid of her fear, "Please, don't be afraid of me, dear.
"You know he deserved it--he killed our children! Besides, this is a rumble, and I'd do it again."
Padme looks wary--the dark side was so strong! And though she knows he is right, still she feels he was wrong.
But while they look wary, thunder rolls from a cloud, And lightning strikes Ani! Padme screams loud!
The quickening gives them the strength of their foe, And also his sword skills--useful to know!
And Gandalf and Malissant still fight tooth and nail, Neither stronger nor weaker, neither's strength has started to fail.
"You know you can't beat me," the Istari says, When they stop for a moment, not wearing a fez.
"I have never quailed before Balrogs or Sauron. Did you think I would fear you, Eldest Shadow of Kryton?"
"You can't stand forever," the shehap retorts. "My power is hatred, an undying force!
Nothing can beat me, or match with my might!" Gandalf only smiles. "What about the BaenKryt?"
With a roar of bitter hatred, the shehap does charge, And their battle continues (a half hour, so far),
And all the combatants continue to fight. And that's my five minutes. There's a new flash of light!

(So Perrin and Faile are fighting the Ogre Champion of Grimorg in the ruined Food Court. Carnage and Dr. Strange are fighting each other, one floor below. Anakin and Padme are recovering from the quickening, near the entrance, and Malissant and Gandalf continue their sorcerous battle)

Cindy Wrote:
Jar Jar Binks: Ooo! Disa bein' a berry berry scary fight! Moi moi! A new fighta bein' flashed into da Food Court - an' it's da Flash, dat berry berry fast man from da comics! Hesa runnin' around so fast dat de Ogre can't hit him, and moi moi! hesa berry berry angry! Da Flash is smilin' at Perri an' Faile, cause he's decidin' to help dem, mesa tinks. Now hesa hittin' da Ogre all fast, and da Ogre is tryin' to swat at him, but hesa might as well be swattin' at flies! Ooo...but now da Orgre isa hittin' him berry berry hard! So wesa gonna leave dem for now an' see what's happening in other places...oh! Dat spooky man Dr. Strange isa doin' some sorta spell, mesa tinks.
Dr.Strange: By the dread Dormmamu, I command you to depart this human!
Jar Jar: Moi, moi! Dat Carnage thing is becomin' two things! Dat alien thing and dat man are two beings now, it seems.   An' now da man slinks off, since he's weak now, mesa tinks, an' da alien is left to fight Dr. Strange. Disa gonna be messy...me no watchin'! Ooo...poodoo...mesa havin' to watch...oh, da alien isa vanished! Dr. Strange banished him far far away. An' dat man dat used to be Carnage is leaving da building...so much for dat, mesa tink. An' now Dr. Strange isa goin' to da battle with da wizard an' da evil evil guy! Disa gonna be messy too! An' Ani and Padm� are gettin' up after da lightening an' lookin pretty strong, mesa tinks...all dat extra power from da Kurgan guy bein' dead. Yay, Ani! Uh-oh...hesa berry berry mad...but Padm� isa tryin' to calm him down before hesa goes runnin' off to destory tings....more things are gonna be messy, mesa tinks...an' a new fighter coming!

(So the Flash lying badly wounded near the Ogre while Perrin and Faile prepare to attack, Dr. Strange is heading for the Gandalf-Mali-neto duel, and Anakin and Padm� have absorbed the quickening and are looking for where they can fight, although Padm� is trying to calm down Anakin first)

RJ Wrote:
*FLASH*
RJ: Another competitor has entered the fight--he is on top of the roof. He screams as he jumps off and slides down the wall, catching himself now and again with . . . claws?!?
Prof. X: Yes, it appears that the new competitor is Logan. Most commonly known as the mutant Wolverine.
RJ: Oh welcome back Professor--I am glad to see that you are OK.
Prof. X: Yes, I am quite well--although, I did not like my hasty exit from the Rumble!
RJ: Well, you know I had to pull for the bad guy every once and a while.
Prof. X: I hope that will not be true for my student, Logan as well. He had just entered the floor which holds the wounded Flash, the champion Ogre and most recently the duo of Perrin and Faile.
RJ: Oh, I have a bad feeling about this.
George Lucas: HEY!! That's MY line!!!!
RJ: Oh deal with it and go finish up that 3rd movie will ya! ANYWAY, Wolverine enters and attacks the biggest threat of all--the Ogre.
Prof. X: I hope that he has not gotten himself into a predicament that the X-Men will need to get him out of.
RJ: I hope so too, Professor. But even if he has, only one would be allowed in at a time to assist them--and that is not even guaranteed! I just love that aspect of the Rumble.
Prof. X: Obviously, so do Perrin and Faile. They took one look at the ferocious battle between the Ogre and Wolverine and decided it was best to leave. It doesn't take Logan long afterwards to finish the Ogre off. He'll need some time to rest though--lucky he has mutant healing abilities.
RJ: So, Perrin and Faile head off to the ground floor while both the Flash and Wolverine recover. Anakin and Padme are looking for another fight, and it just so happens that they too are now on the ground floor. You have to realize that eventually one of these guys will need to fight one of the other and since Anakin has a history of being weak, my bet it is on him.
(BUT I will leave that to others to decide.)
Prof. X: Meanwhile, Gandalf is holding his own between the Dark Shehap possessing my old nemesis, Eric.
RJ: Yes, isn't it quite amazing how much strength Malissant can give an old, tired fighter?
Prof. X: Indeed. If Gandalf is to survive this he'll need some help. Dr. Strange has finally arrived--but whom will he help?
RJ: Yeah? I mean Gandalf is good, but Malissant is persuasive. But it appears that yet another competitor is coming--so it is not up to me to decide!

(So the 2 couples--Perrin/Faile and Anakin/Padme are on the ground floor separate still but looking for fights. The Flash (still wounded) and Wolverine (recuperating), are in the destroyed Food Court. Dr Strange is observing the Gandalf�Mali-neto fight.)

ROUND 10

Brian Wrote:
***FLASH***
Flash: Did someone say my name?
Mr. Paradox: How did he hear a written version of a visual effect?
Brian: His super speediness?
Mr. Speedy: Did you call me?
Brian: Oh enough already! So that flash of light brought our 46th competitor. It is Tarzan, and he appears on about the 5th floor, by a window. Looking out he sees Gandalf and Mali-Neto fighting and some other guy sneaking up on him. Ever the hero, he leaps from the window. He grabs onto a convenient vine and swings around the building attempting to get to the ground. I say attempt, because the "vine" was actually a leftover web from when Spidey was still in there and he is now rather stuck in it.
Meanwhile Dr. Strange decides to join in the magical battle on the only team the Rumble really supports, his own! He blasts both of the magical beings with a spell from the nether-worlds ensnaring them both in a separate vine mass that also eats into the concrete and opens a hole, dropping them onto the floor of the parking lots below. Gandalf hits a ramp and rolls down to the level below that.
Meanwhile, up in the food court, the Flash and Wolverine have recovered and have begun to do battle! The Flash is much to fast for the fierce warrior, but no matter how many times Flash hits him, Wolverine just recovers and keeps on fighting!
Outside, Perrin and Faile have just come face to face with Anakin and Padme. Ani ignites his lightsaber and Perrin brandishes his ax as there is a great ***FLASH***
Flash: I heard that, thanks, I am great!

(So, Gandalf and Mali-Neto are battling Dr. Strange's spell on the 2nd and 1st subfloors. Dr. Strange is still on the surface, deciding who to take on next. The 2 two-somes are about to start fighting by the door to the lobby. And Flash and Wolverine are battling in the food court)

Mark Wrote:
Santa Claus: Ho, Ho, Ho! Here I am at last! I'm here to eat candy canes, and kick butt! And I'm all out of candy canes!
Mr. T: Have some fun-tasty-crumble, fool!
Santa Claus: Ho, Ho! In a moment, T! First, I need to report the next five minutes of fighting. The new competitor has appeared near where Wolverine and the Flash are fighting in the much mangled food court. It's a shaggy-haired man in a shabby robe. Flash and Wolverine are distracted, but Wolverine snarls at him. He draws a long stick from his robes and points it at Wolverine.
Remus Lupin: STUPEFY!!!
Santa Claus: Ho, Ho, Ho! It seems Wolverine isn't quite sure where he is.   And the Flash decides to attack our newcomer. But Lupin waves his wand again.
Lupin: IMPEDIMENTA!!!
Santa: Ho! Now it seems the Flash is running through molasses or something. He is very, very slow-ho-ho! And Lupin has thrown a McDonalds hamburger into the Flash's face! And Wolverine is shaking off the stunning spell, but it looks like Lupin has the upper hand, at least for now. Meanwhile, Malissant and Gandalf are still fighting off Dr. Strange's spell. Malissant, while grateful in a way for a reason to break off his battle with Gandalf is also incensed! No one may dare to attack the Eldest son of Kryton! With a howl of rage, the vine spell burns off him, and he springs into the air, hovering over the hole the spell made into the parking lot. Dr. Strange backs up a few paces into the entryway; But Malissant simply hovers there, an odd half smile playing across his lips.
Malissant: So, you dare to challenge me, do you?
Santa: Dr. Strange can sense the powerful force inside the man he once called Magneto, and prepares a spell to banish the shehap from his avatar. Malissant strikes out before he can react, and the ground beneath the mystic sorcerer erupts in molten rock, engulfing him and turning his body to ash! Ho-Ho-Ho! I bet that hurt a lot!
Meanwhile, The Skywalkers have come upon The Aybarras, and suddenly Perrin feels an indescribable rush of rage and hatred. He rushes at Anakin, and strikes with his axe! Faile takes the cue, and rushes at Padme with her knives. She is much more successful than her husband! Anakin uses the force to hold Perrin off until he can light his lightsaber, and then attacks with a new vengeance! Perrin cannot parry these blows, and he is getting hit again and again! Meanwhile, Faile is scoring hits with her knives. It seems that she has the advantage at fighting in close quarters.   Now, if Padme could just back up enough to use her blaster, it might be another tale altogether! Ho-Ho-Ho! Uh-oh!
It seems Faile has chased Padme to the entryway, and they almost run right into Malissant, having just finished off Dr. Strange. He smiles a wicked smile and seizes both women by the shoulders. They shudder as he begins pumping wattage through their bodies! Ho-Ho! I can see the sparks flashing off their teeth! They both try desperately to bring their weapons into play, but Malissant uses Magneto's power to hurl the metal weapons across the room. This alerts Perrin and Anakin, and the two husbands stop fighting and turn toward their wives.
Anakin and Perrin: NOOOO!!!!
Santa: Ho-Ho! It's too late boys! Your ladies are now charcoal!
Mark: Are you sure you're Santa Claus?
Santa: Of course I am! Who else would I be, for goodness sake? Anyway, Perrin still feels this incredible rage and anger, and he rushes to attack Malissant. Anakin follows, desperate for revenge. Malissant sneers and the battle is underway! Perrin reaches him first, but a magnetic field sends the axe sailing away, and then makes it chase Perrin across the room.   Anakin swings his lightsaber, but Malissant flies backward and sends a malice bolt hurtling at his chest. Anakin deflects it with his lightsaber and--Ho-Ho! Malissant was surprised by that! And he might be surprised by something else! Gandalf has shaken off Dr. Strange's spell, and has quietly returned to the surface. Just as he's wondering where everyone got to, he hears a voice from above him.
Tarzan: They all went inside. I'd love to come in and help too. Little help here?
Santa: Of course, that isn't really what Tarzan said--mostly Gorilla talk. But Gandalf seems to understand it, because he shoots a bolt of fire and severs Spiderman's web, freeing the ape-man to join the contest. And Anakin and Perrin could really use the help. Malissant knows he has to focus on Anakin, so he uses his power to pick Perrin up and send him hurtling into the wall at a tremendous speed, Ho-Ho! He smacks against the wall, and sees stars! Ho Ho Ho! His nose is bleeding like a red river! Ho Ho Ho! Ah, but he's okay, though.
Mark: You are NOT Santa Claus.
Not Santa Claus: Anyway, He's just been knocked cold. His last thought as he goes under is that all that anger and hatred he's been feeling isn't really coming from him. And then it dawns on him--There's a wolf somewhere above him! And it's very angry because it is trapped somewhere where it can't move or do anything at all. Perrin falls unconscious, and Gandalf and Tarzan are about to enter, and Ho Ho Ho! There's another flash of light! Merry Christmas!

(Lupin, Wolverine, and the Flash are fighting in the mangled food court. Malissant and Anakin are battling in the lobby, and Perrin is lying unconscious over by the wall. Gandalf and Tarzan are at the entranceway, about to enter and join the battle.)

Cindy Wrote:
Tolkien: Well, well. What�s this? Another one of my creations, I believe.
George Lucas: Yes, and what a nasty, disgusting little thing it is!
Tolkien: And I suppose Jabba the Hutt is a cuddly little teddy bear?
Lucas: No, but the Ewoks are! He heh!
Tolkien: Anyway, this particular fellow slinking around the hallways is none other than Smeagol, more recently known as Gollum.
Cindy: Wasn�t he up here with the commentators a while back?
Tolkien: I can�t be troubled to check on that. He�s in the fight now! Now, he�s appeared in a dark hallway in the upper hotel levels, which is a bit too close to the sun for his taste, but at least it�s far away from anyone else, so he can sneak about unnoticed.
Cindy: As long as he�s doing nothing but sneaking, let�s take a look at the others. Ah! There�s a bit of action where Lupin appeared five minutes ago. It looks like the Flash is starting to shake off the slowing down spell, but before he�s back up to speed; Lupin hits him with a stunning spell. Flash crashes to the ground, out cold. Meanwhile, though Wolverine is disoriented, he has enough of his feral instincts to attack Lupin. The werewolf only just blocks him with a shield charm. While Wolverine reels from the force of it, Lupin hits him with the same stunning spell that took out Flash. Unfortunately, Wolverine is a bit too strong to be knocked out by just one wizard, and he just stumbles about dizzily. Lupin frowns, knowing that the only spell he could use to permanently defeat either opponent is strictly against wizarding law. �I won�t do it!� he declares, and a moment later he Disapparates. Meanwhile, after he leaves Wolverine staggers about, claws still extended, and collides right into Flash � oh, he just stabbed him right through! And completely by accident.
Well, Lupin has Reapparated just out of sight at the lobby entrance, watching what�s going on before getting involved.
Lucas: And what a sight it is! The Chosen One is going at Malissant with incredible speed and might. Certainly this villain I�ve never even heard of will be no match for my creation.
Mark: Hey! You have too heard of him! And have you forgotten that Malissant was dwelling in Anakin for part of this rumble??
Lucas: Hem! Don�t know what you�re talking about. Though perhaps that may explain why Anakin is so particularly determined to defeat Malissant. That, and how he killed Padm�, of course. Anyway, Malissant keeps shooting some energy stuff at Anakin, but the Chosen One easily blocks most of them with his lightsaber, and dodges the others with great agility.
Tolkien: You�re far too biased of a commentator. Your little Jedi is having quite a difficult time of it, actually. He looks exhausted.
Lucas: Yeah? Well, what about your little stinker? Where�s he?
Tolkien: Muttering desperately about his precious, Gollum has been creeping downstairs. He cannot find any trace of the ring, naturally, but if he spies that Gandalf is in the lobby he may try to find out more from him � by the nastiest means, of course. Speaking of Gandalf, the wizard has just charged forward to join Anakin! Together they may yet defeat this vile creature.   But wait! What�s this? A little shadow is creeping up to Tarzan � preparing to jump � and Gollum has just seized Tarzan�s throat!
He is much smaller, but the desire for his precious gives him unnatural strength, and finally Tarzan falls to the ground, strangled. Now Gollum watches Gandalf with glittering, hungry eyes, waiting to learn news of the ring.
Cindy: And now another fighter is coming!

(So, in the lobby, Gandalf and Anakin are fighting Malissant-Magneto, Gollum and Lupin are separately watching from the shadows, Perrin is still unconscious in the food court, and Wolverine is recovering from Lupin�s spell.)

RJ Wrote:
*FLASH*
[A cold wind enters the entire building]
Gollum: Whatsis this?
Gandalf: I fear a great evil has entered the Rumble.
Doc Brown, of Back to the Future fame: GREAT SCOTT! That's right, it's...
RJ: It is one of the feared fighters of Mortal Kombat, Sub-Zero! He has entered the lobby and has started to walk toward Anakin, Gandalf and Malissant/Magneto.
Doc: Gandalf has fought the Balrog, a demon of fire, but what will he do about this??
Lupin: I'll take care of him!
RJ: Professor Lupin has charged out of the shadows to face Sub-Zero!
Lupin: STUP...
Doc: GREAT SCOTT! Sub-Zero has frozen Remus Lupin! He walks over and with a series of Ninja kicks and punches, ends Lupin's life in a Flawless Victory. However Lupin's wand glides harmlessly to a stop by the outside doors.
RJ: This sends everybody in different directions. Anakin and Gandalf realize this is a good chance to get away, regroup, and recuperate--maybe even attend to Perrin--so they head of to the Food Court.
Gollum: Whereses my PRECIOUS!!
Doc: The creature known as Gollum charges towards Gandalf, but is cut off by Mali-neto.
Malissant: YOU should know pitiful creature, that where there is but One Lord of the Rings--that is certainly not you!! The future will soon reveal that only I, the greatest Dark Shehap, will rule all--when I secure each Key. Your presence is no longer needed here! [He throws Gollum out of the window and across the street--then turns his attention to Sub-Zero. Gollum lands in a trash heap, dead]
RJ: Well, I guess there was no pity to stay Malissant's hand. Another competitor is dead, and one more is soon to come.

(So, Sub-Zero is preparing to attack Malissant/Magneto, Anakin and Gandalf run up to the Food Court to see how Perrin is doing, while Wolverine--having rested, heads own to see what all the commotion is about--the easy way, through the window! He lands and picks up Lupin's wand.)

ROUND 11

Brian Wrote:
Troy McClure: Hi! I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such fighting films as BloodBath XV: The TeleTubbies meet Mr. Blender, and School House vs. The Rock. Today I'm here to do color commentary for Rumble '03. Anyway, Malissant is about to pulverize Sub Zero. He shoots a blast of hate and fire at him, but 'Zero just freezes it like a dying hamster. He shoots his rope/ hook at Malissant and shouts "Get over here!" Mali-neto just dodges aside though and yells back, "No! You get here!" and hauls the ninja across the room by his belt buckle, shin guards, and face mask (I think they are all metal). This probably won't be pretty.
Meanwhile, at the food court, Anakin and Gandalf have propped up Perrin against a wall. Gandalf pours some miruvor down Perrin's throat and after a moment he splutters and coughs. It seems he will revive in a moment or two.
At the same time, Wolverine is outside. He looks up from retrieving Lupin's wand to see our new competitor. He only has a moment to react before a red lightsaber slashes the wand in half. A kick sends him sprawling, but only for a moment as he leaps up, claws extended.
Wolverine: You've gotten uglier since the last time I saw ya Toad.
Troy McClure: Wolverine better be careful though, Toad never carried a double-bladed lightsaber. Nor did he wield the dark side of the Force like this competitor can.
The two warriors charge each other, and Wolverine takes a swipe at 'Toad.' However, he pulls back a clawless hand!
Wolverine: Oh, you'll pay for that one Toad!
McClure: Wolverine didn't learn his lesson; he tried another swipe at his opponent and lost the claws from the other hand. This time he also gets a severe case of indigestion and a force push across the street. The incorrectly labeled Toad goes inside to join the battle against Mali-Neto.

(So, Anakin, Gandalf, and Perrin are in the Food Court. Wolverine is in the street with a lightsaber slash in his gut {which should heal} and all his claws missing {which won't heal}. Mali-Neto and Sub-Zero are in the Lobby and Darth Maul is about to join them.)

Mark Wrote:
Miracle Max: Oy, there's so many guys fightin' and making a fuss. Where's my glasses? I can't see who the next guy is. Oh, I get it, it's that little green shlamolie with the funny white Mohawk on his head. He appears on about the tenth floor or so, all by his lonesome, but he don't seem to mind much. He spots a food cart, and a bathroom, and before you can say "gluttony and sloth," he's up to his neck in warm bathwater, and slurping on pastries. Oy, vey! I can see the little green boils popping all over his body already. I think we're gonna have quite an infestation soon.
Meanwhile, a few floors down, Gandalf and Anakin are still tending to Perrin with Tolkien's peculiar form of first aid--if someone's near death, why don't ya' just pump him full a liquor, and that'll make him right as rain, eh?
Tolkien: Well, in many ancient mythologies, wine was considered--
Not Santa Claus: Ho Ho! Holiday depression got ya' down? Try booze!(tm)
Mark: Who are you anyway?
Miracle Max: Hello, over there! It's my turn now! Thank you very much. So, Perrin is still staggering to his feet, and Gandalf is gonna stick with him for a while. And Anakin says he's gonna go back down the stairs and keep fighting Malissant. So he takes the stairs two at a time, and arrives in the lobby in a few seconds and--oh my!
Jar Jar Binks: Ew! Icky poo!
Brian: That'll leave a scar!
Miracle Max: Well, Sub Zero is all over the lobby walls now. One of my special pills wouldn't help that one. I don't think they could even identify him from his dental records.
Not Santa Claus: Like giving baking soda to a pigeon. Ho, Ho, Ho!
Miracle Max: Yeah, well anyway, Malissant is standing in the middle of the lobby, grinning at the carnage, and he sees Anakin, and they both flex their muscles, so to speak. But suddenly the lobby doors fly open, and there stands Darth Maul, looking menacing.
Malissant: You! You killed me in the first rumble!
Miracle Max: Indeed he did, along with Paksenarrion. But Anakin looks a little more upset. He recognizes Darth Maul. It is the Sith creature that fought with Qui-Gon on Tatooine, and later killed him on Naboo.
Anakin: My name is Anakin Skywalker! You killed my master! Prepare to die!
Miracle Max: Oh, sure. THAT's original. But Darth Maul just snarls one word at him.
Darth Maul: JEDI!
Miracle Max: And the Jedi and the Sith are at it! Darth Maul has the edge but I think it's just because he's more fresh (a lot more fresh, now that I think of it). Anakin's been through a lot this rumble, and has held up like a champion. And now he's going after Darth Maul like he was the most powerful Jedi ever.
Meanwhile, Malissant seems torn. On the one hand, he hates Darth Maul for killing him before. But he hates Anakin even more for forcing him out (and probably fears him just a little, I might add). But while he stands there, trying to decide which one he hates more, down the stairs comes Gandalf leading Perrin, and the two Ian McKellan characters spot each other and groan a little. Malissant hates him too, of course, but it has become clear to both of them that further fighting between them would be pointless--they're too well matched.
But just as Malissant is wondering which of those three adversaries he ought to attack, the choice is taken away from him.
Wolverine: I thought I'd find you here, bub!
Miracle Max: Wolverine dives across the lobby and tackles Mallisant/Magneto, attacking viciously. Malissant is just lucky his claws are gone, or he'd be leaving the rumble on a stretcher right now. And here comes another competitor!

(So, Wolverine is fighting Magneto/Malissant while Gandalf and Perrin look on. Anakin and Darth Maul are fighting each other. All six of those are in the lobby. Stripe is in the bathroom of a tenth floor apartment with roughly thirty of his offspring, each about half-formed.)

Cindy Wrote:
Cindy: The newest competitor has just appeared behind Gandalf and Perrin, a swarthy man with frightful glint in his eyes and a short blade in hand - why, it's one of my creations! Well, that's a first. This is Yiral, a human with equal prowess in any weapon, including his own bare hands, and an insatiable thirst for bloodshed. He also possesses a remarkable power of persuading people to follow him. And he wastes no time upon first appearing. He looks at the pair in front of him, who hasn�t yet sensed his appearance, and immediately discerns that the self-assured, tall man is a greater threat than the younger one, still unsure on his feet. So he steps behind Gandalf and drives his blade straight through his back. Gandalf crumples to the ground, the blade sticking out of his chest. Yiral doesn't bother to retrieve it. Perrin has turned to him in horror and raises his axe, but Yiral faces him without flinching at the weapon. With his fists he knocks the handle out of Perrin's grip, then proceeds to thrust at Perrin's skull, neck and chest with his bare hands, until it is too much for the already wounded man. As Perrin falls, unconscious once more, Yiral takes the axe and moves onto his next intended victim.
Lucas: This guy's kind of a sicko. Can we see what's going on away from him, please?
Cindy: Didn't know you were so squeamish. All right -- Mali-neto has neatly taken care of Wolverine for the present by raising his metal-lined frame into the air. And there the X-man hangs, growling in frustration but helpless. And now Malissant has sensed that someone has slain Gandalf, which infuriates him since he wanted to get revenge himself. Before he can get at Yiral, however, Wolverine falls on top of him. The metal hold was broken while Malissant was distracted. So Yiral has the chance to approach Anakin and Maul. Undaunted by the glowing swords they both bear, he charges into the fray with the axe, his eyes alight with bloodlust. Taken aback, Anakin only just manages to block the first blow, and they begin to engage in a deadly sparring match. Maul hangs back for a moment, apparently deciding whether to take sides or just attack them both. In the meantime, Yiral, though his axe is beginning to fail against the lightsaber, gets a deep slash on Anakin's neck. Weak from blood loss, Anakin wavers, and in that instant, Yiral seizes the saber from his trembling hands. He does not hesitate before running it through Anakin's chest. Now Maul cannot help but look on Yiral in admiration.
Yiral: We would make a good team, you and I - don't you agree?
Cindy: His persuasive powers work like magic, and Maul gives a gruff nod. Of course, if Maul knew Yiral as well as I do, he might want to watch for an axe in his back. Together, they start towards Mali-neto and Wolverine. Now another fighter is coming!   Oh, yes, and Stripe is still busy with his nefarious reproducing, nasty little creature.

(So, Mali-neto is pushing a slightly-dazed Wolverine off of him, while Yiral and Maul advance on them, Perrin lies unconscious again, and Stripe and his progeny replicate)

RJ Wrote:
RJ: Well, well, well, it seems that there is been a lot of killing in this last round--unfortunately this newest competitor will not shrink those statistics at all, wouldn't you agree Genie?
Genie: Yeah--I mean, this guy did try to kill my greatest master, Aladdin, and in the process he made me do some really wicked stuff too. But I am FREE . . . Free at last, free!
RJ: OK, Genie, I get the idea. The flash of light brought the sorcerer Jafar. I believe that this is his first Rumble. Well see how he fares.
Genie: I hope he rots in h . . .
RJ: WOAH, man! Lets keep this on the up and up, Genie. Anyway, Wolverine is conscious now and he figures he has had enough of his old friend Magneto and he runs off and meets up with Yiral and Darth Maul--I don't know how well
a healer mutant would do against a lightsaber AND a huge axe, but we are about to see.
Genie: Well, Alriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight! Let me hear ya say "Fan"
Audience: "FAN"
Genie: Let me hear ya say "Tasty"
Audience: "TASTY"
Genie: Let me hear ya "Crumble"
Audience: "CRUMBLE"
Genie: Give it up for...
Lucas: OK, Mr. Disney-character-voiced-by-a-funny-man, give it a rest! MY CREATION is about to go Sith-ish on some cartoon-mutant-wannabe-hero, and. . .
RJ: Ok that's enough, George. How many times have we banished you from the commentators booth? You don't see Stan or J.R.R. making such a fuss over their characters. Just leave the commentating to us.
Genie: That's right bub. Besides Walt could kick your . . .
RJ: OK! OK! Stop it all of you! I'll take it from here. Wolverine does end up meeting with Yiral and Maul, and as predicted, it does not go well for the X-Man. Maul charges him with the double-edged lightsaber. Having learned from his previous encounter with "Toad", Wolverine, dodges the skilled Sith as best as he can. But Yiral with Perrin's axe is too much.
Yiral plants it directly into Wolverine's neck and slices the head off. It dangles by only the spine . . . (For Adamantium is too strong for an axe, but not a lightsaber--as previously declared, so . . .) Maul finishes the job. No amount of mutant healing power will heal you from decapitation.
Mark: Well that's all well and good RJ--but what else is happening?
RJ: Excellent question, my friend. Jafar and Mali-neto have sized each other up during the whole previous killing. After, exchanging a few blasts from each other--in their own unique way, an agreement is about to be reached. I am sure that Jafar thinks he can take some old man, but Malissant knows better. His "host" has served him well, but the Dark Shehap feels the power he could have with Jafar--his choice has been made!
Malissant: I can sense, you sir, are a great Sorcerer. I too, can help you become even greater--we can defeat all who remain in this Rumble. If you but join me.
Jafar: I can tell that your power does exceed my own. We have an accord!
RJ: The two shake hands and Malissant now possesses Jafar! A dangerous combo indeed. This leaves Magneto weak and very tired. Another competitor is about to come in, but not before Stripe's spawn start to feed on the weakened and dead mutants. And now it's back to Brian!

(So, Malissant is now controlling Jafar--maybe "Jalissant" will work--Yiral and Maul look around for their next victim. Stripe is reproducing like mad and the little ones are eating Wolverine and the first #1 to go down, Magneto!)

ROUND 12

Brian Wrote:
Donkey: Hey this is great! We can stay up late swappin' manly stories and watchin' the carnage! And in the mornin' I'm making waffles!
Homer: Mmmmm, Waffles! Hehhehuhihhu!
Lisa: I don't believe it a talking donkey!
Princess Fiona: The hard part is getting him to shut up!
Donkey: Hey! I can here you! You just better hope my buddy Shrek don't here you. Ain't that right Shrek? . . . Shrek? Now where did he get off to? Probably building a wall.
Fiona: Actually Donkey, he's gotten a lot better lately. See, there he is! He's on the Eighth floor of that building. And the whole building is now beginning to fill with those gross little green skinned things!
Brian: Yes they've spread from the Tenth floor (where they started) all the way down to the second (where the food court is), as well as up to the twelfth (why not).
Donkey: Watch out Shrek! Those green things are comin' for ya!
Shrek: Hello, fellow green skinned guys!
Gremlins: Rip! Tear! Gnash! Bite! Scratch! Crunch! Chew! Thrash! Shred! Smash! Eat! DESTROY!
Shrek: Owh, come on now! That ain't nice! Can't we settle this over a pint? No? Okay!
*Theme Music Begins*
Donkey: Now we gonna really see some Rumble! Shrek grabs one of the green things and spins him around and out a window. Then he grabs another and smashes him head first into three more who evaporate?! Cool!   But they don't learn, they are still comin' at my man Shrek! And he keeps smashin', throwin', and hittin' 'em!
Brian: If Shrek knew it he could pull the blinds open and more would be destroyed by the sunlight that was let in when he tossed that one out the window. However the shade only fluttered long enough to destroy those four (plus the one out the window). Course Shrek seems to be holding them off for now.
Lisa Simpson: Meanwhile Maul and Yiral have encountered some gremlins too. They seem to not like the brightness of Maul's lightsaber, though it isn't bright enough to kill them. Anyway they are mostly attacking Yiral. Of course they both are racking up a large body count, but Yiral is definitely taking the brunt of the endless assault.
Donkey: Don't forget that weird dude with the goatee! Jafalissy or Mafair or whatever his name is. He has started blasting some gremlins too. OH! What a flash of light!

(So, from the top, Stripe and some others are still swimming in tubs on the 10th floor, while the smarter progeny have donned robes, hats and sunglasses and have begun spray-painting the windows dark. Shrek is fighting gremlins on the 8th floor. Maul and Yiral are piling bodies on the 3rd floor, and Jafalissant is blasting gremlins on the 2nd floor. And Perrin lies still unconscious on the 2nd floor, for the moment still over looked.)

Mark Wrote:
Gollum: AAah! The flash is so bright! It happenss on the eighth floor--
Mark: Wait a minute. Weren't you just--?
Gollum: Iss a problem?
RJ: But his body is still in the food court!
Gollum: Yess! Nassty RJ, lets uss get killed in about ten minutess, GOLLUM!
Tolkien: Now, be good there, Gollum
Gollum: Oh Yesss! Gollum iss alwayss good for nice massterss! Would never hurt them, no!
Mark: Well, all right then.
Gollum: Yess, as we were saying, the flassh is on the eighth level, near to that Nassty ogre Ssshrek, it is! It is an ugly old man, with a ssquint in hiss eyeses.
Popeye: Well, if it aint some big green goon, there, put up your dukes, why don't ya?
Gollum: Aah! It talkss without moving itss lipses! GOLLUM! And itss trying to fight with Shrek, it is! Nassty sailor-man doessn't know who he iss!
Smeagol: But now, he sees that there are gremlinss to be fought.
Gollum: Yess! Nassty Gremlinses! They iss eating our preciouses poor body right now.
Smeagol: No! We doesn't want to see it!
Gollum: Itss too late for us, my love! We've already been killed! Lost! Lossst!!!
Tolkien: Well, while Gollum pulls it together, I may as well give a little commentary m'self. It seems Popeye and Shrek have come to a momentary truce, with all the gremlins to fight, and oh my! They make a pretty good team, don't they?
Gollum: Yess! Doesn't they, my preciouss! The ugly one isss Punching them, and the fat one is knocking them around, yess! And the ugly one iss picking them up, and rolling them all together into a big green ball, issn't he!
Smeagol: Yess! And then he sspinss them over hiss head while Shrek climbs to the top of a stairwell.
Gollum: And The Nassty Sailor-man throwses them over the edge, and they land with ssplats and ssmacks!
Smeagol: And the fat one jumpss from the sstair, and landss on them with hiss bottom!
Brian and Mark: BUMSPLAT!!!!!
Tolkien: Huh?
Brian: Uh, Never mind.
Mark: Long story.
Smeagol: Well, the gremlins are ssquished now, aren't they my love?
Gollum: Yess! They squish with blood and green slime! But more there are, GOLLUM, aren't they, my preciouss! And Sstripe is still undiscovered, and he iss making more and more, and they will overwhelm them eventually, GOLLUM!
Smeagol: But Nassty Sith and Cruel Torain are still fighting them, and so is Cruel wizard with his shining sssnake ssstaff!
Gollum: But Cruel shehap iss sstill angry with nasstysith, and he followss them, my preciouss, he followss them to kill them all again!
Smeagol: Aagh! He shoots fire at them, and hitss the nassty sith in the face. Down he goesss, but not dead yet, my preciouss. Only sstunned is he!
Gollum: And cruel Yiral iss still angry. And another flash of light there iss!

(So, Stripe on the eighth floor, Shrek and Popeye on the seventh stairwell, Yiral, Darth Maul, and Malissant on the third floor, Perrin unconscious on two, and gremlins everywhere!)

Cindy Wrote:
Palpatine: Ah! My old apprentice is holding his own quite well. See how quickly he recovers from the blast, springs to his feet and prepares for another attack!
Cindy: Sigh...I'm not even going to ask how you managed to get up here after dying in the rumble.
Palpatine: You will find you are mistaken about a great many things! Heheheh
Cindy: Well, what do you think of your apprentice now? A gremlin just jumped onto his face.
Palpatine: Erg! Perhaps that Yiral fellow will help him.
Cindy: Hah! Seeing Maul in trouble, Yiral merely abandons him and goes after Jafalissant on his own.
Palpatine: Ah...how very evil...a man after my own heart. I wonder if he'd be interested in an apprenticeship.
Cindy: Not likely. Anyway, all their fighting is interrupted again by a new wave of gremlins, probably the most recent spawn of Stripe. And it's all the three of them can do to kept them back. Maul pulled the one off his face and now he's stabbing the little guys left and right with his saber. Yiral's going at it with his axe, and Jafalissant's doing some mumbo-jumbo with that snake thingy.
Palpatine: But what's this? The green fellows have suddenly stopped swarming...and a distant call comes from a floor or two above, something about food?
Cindy: Hmm. . . Apparently some gremlins have found the food court and are indulging in a bit of gluttony. Right now, their appetite for gorging has exceeded their appetite for violence. The swarming gremlins are climbing upstairs right now in search of their brothers and the food.
Palpatine: And my apprentice takes his chance to get revenge on the traitor! He charges at Yiral, saber raised -
Cindy: And Jafalissant stuns him again! So he thinks by helping Yiral they can form some sort of alliance against Maul? And Yiral accepts, but of course he'll probably turn traitor as soon as it's convenient. Meanwhile, the gremlins are all congregated in the food court, so Popeye and Shrek get a rest for a bit. The newest fighter, meanwhile, has been watching Popeye and Shrek from a corner, unseen and quietly preparing her own plans. It's the Invisible Girl, also known as Sue Richards of the Fantastic Four! But where is Stripe? Oh, well, here comes someone else!

(So Stripe is still making more nasty little green guys, Popeye and Shrek are resting on the seventh floor, Yiral and Jafalissant are facing a stunned Maul on the third floor, and the rest of the gremlins are having a feast in the food court)

RJ Wrote:
RJ: It sure does seem that a few familiar faces have appeared in the announcer booth in this recent round...wouldn't you agree Wes?
Wes Crusher: Yeah, I mean and it always seems to be those contestants who died so quickly--hey! I died quickly! Is that why you invited me here?
RJ: (Smirking) Of course not! I invited you to commentate with me because you know a lot about our next competitor, Lt. Commander Data of the Starship Enterprise.
Wes: Oh him, I was so much cooler than he was...
RJ: Yeah, well how many of the movies were you in? Huh? So why don't you just shut up and help me describe the rumble ok?
Wes: (near tears) OK! FINE! Data appears on the same floor with the resting Shrek and Popeye and the still invisible Sue Richards. The other two heroes approach him.
Data: Greetings, I have come to help you. (Popeye stares with a confused look on his face)
Popeye: A robot? Well, if ya are strong I guess we's could use you.
Data: I am an android. My quest is to become more human. I think I might have an idea to defeating these creeping creatures.
Popeye: Well's let's hears it! (Data starts a scan of some of the gremlins and inputs the information into his hand held computer.)
Data: The information will take a moment to process.
Wes: Just like Data; promises so much and then it is nothing but wait for this or wait for that...
RJ: Huh? Now I realize why Robert killed you so quickly! YOU ARE ANNOYING!!! Why don't you leave?
Wes: You mean I have to go again? I want my mom!! (Leaves the commentating room, crying)
RJ: Well then folks, looks like I am going solo this round.
Han Solo: Did someone call for me? Can I go in and revenge Leia's death?
RJ: Aren't you supposed to be dead too?
Brian: Oh no, he's still alive. Chewie mistook Indy for Han. But you can only have one competitor added every five minutes. Sorry, good buddy. (Han looks sad, and angry)
RJ: Maybe later though, anyway, back to the action. Data is still waiting for a full diagnosis of the gremlins and the fight between Yiral,
Maul, and the Malissant possessed Jafar continues on. Maul has faced 2 on 1 fights before, and has come out semi-victorious. I have no idea how this will turn out.
Mark: Hey, check out the action on the 7th floor!
RJ: It seems that Data has stumbled on to the weakness of the gremlins--light!
Data: (To Shrek and Popeye) It appears that the creatures have an adverse affect to brightness. They retreat to their former state of origin when they encounter it.
Shrek: Huh? What would that be in easy talk, uh? (Popeye nods in agreement)
Data: The slimy things don't like light. They go back to where they were created.
Shrek: Well, then lets follow then and throw open some of these windows on the way!
Sue Richards: (Coming out from the shadows) I would also like to help.
RJ: Woah! I bet that took the guys by surprise. They all seem to be in agreement and they move upwards following the gremlins back to spawn.
Meanwhile it appears that the recovering Perrin has awakened and found himself without a weapon and surrounded by feeding gremlins.

(So the battle on 3 with Yiral, Maul, and Jafalissant continues. Perrin is awake now on 2 and the really "Freaky Four" {Shrek, Popeye, Invisible Girl, and Lt. Comm. Data} are on the 10th following the gremlins to spawn)

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