A Simple Act of Faith
Chapter 3

“Good morning!” Faith called out when she entered the office.  Lindsey was sitting by Cordelia’s desk looking at some papers.   He looked up and struggled to smile, but it hurt him everytime he did it.  He felt nothing.

“Faith,” he said.  He got up and went over to him.  Lilith was standing behind her.  She frowned when Lindsey gave Faith a quick kiss on the cheek.  Lilith had never been to happy that Faith worked with Lindsey, Alex and Gunn.  She preferred that she worked alone.  The Watchers had been afraid that Faith would turn out like Buffy and divorce the council.

“Hey Shortcake, anything new?”

“No,” he said and went back to his desk.

Faith sighed.  Things, for some reason, had been strained for the last few months.  They had gone on a few dates, but Lindsey had been lackluster.  That’s when Faith decided to be friends for a little while until Lindsey had gotten over Cordelia’s death.  She didn’t think it would be fair to their relationship if she was the rebound.

Alex came out of her office to greet the arrivals.

“Morning Alex,” Faith said.

“Good morning,” she said and smiled.

“Come along Faith,” Lilith said.  “We have to train.”

Lilith shot both Lindsey and Alex a look as she headed down the stairs.

Alex rubbed her arms.  “I feel like a stranger in my own home when she’s here.”

Lindsey shrugged his shoulders.  “She thinks we’re bystanders,” he explained.  “She’s afraid we’ll get hurt if we’re around Faith.”

Alex did not reply.  She would be dead without Lindsey and Faith, but she also wouldn’t have met Wesley.  Sometimes she regretted meeting him.  Other times she was glad they had that short time.

“I don’t blame her,” he explained.  Except he thought it was the people around him who would die.

“Well, she better start warming up if she wants to train downstairs—“ Alex paused and thought of good segue. “We should move,” she said.  “We need to find a better space.”

Lindsey sighed.  He buried himself back into the papers.  “I’m not ready to move yet.”

“A change will do you good.  It will do everyone good.”

Lindsey and Alex had had this talk several times in the past two months and it always ended the same way.

“I’m not ready for change,” he said.  “Please.  Besides the real estate market right now is bad.  You won’t get anything good for this place and it will cost far to much for any other property.  This place is ideal.  Wait a few more months until interest rates go down.”

Alex did not reply.  When Faith and her realized that a month after Cordelia’s death, Lindsey was not getting better, they decided to push for the move.  Half the time Lindsey would just state he wasn’t ready, the other half he would gave the lawyer talk why it was not economical to move.

“Please tell me when we should,” she said.  Her voice got lower.  “I don’t like this place anymore.”

“I understand,” he said.  But there was no where he wanted to go.  He did not care anymore.
 

“Your mind is elsewhere today,” Lilith said to Faith.

“Sorry,” she said while hitting a punching bag.

“You cannot be distracted when you fight the vampires.”

“I ain’t,” she retorted.  “Just when I’m off duty.  Besides, we made the same deal Wesley and I made.  Part of my life is my own.”

“I know.  I don’t have a problem.  But I am worried about your relationship with Mr. McDonald.”

“There is no relationship,” Faith replied and punched the bag even harder.  “We’re just friends right now.”

“But you do love him.”

Faith stopped punching.  She grabbed hold of the bag and buried her head in it.  She finally nodded.

“And you have had—relations?  Correct.”

Faith came out of her hiding place. “We were both out of it when it happened.  That’s why we’re being cool about things now.  Lindsey’s gotta mourn.  He doesn’t need a girlfriend in the meantime.”

“But you are afraid that when does get over his wife’s death, he will not want you.”

Faith did not reply.  Lilith was a strange woman.  She was even more anal retentive than Wesley, but she was extremely insightful.  Far more than Giles.  She knew Faith very well and it had only been three months.

Faith shrugged her shoulders.  “I gotta live with whatever he decides.”

“Faith—“ Lilith paused.  “What I am about to say is not attacking you.  I have a suggestions that may be good for you.”

“What?” she said and stared at Lilith.

“You may want to consider leaving Los Angeles and moving to a new location.  The council has said that there is a grave vampire problem in New York.  They could use a slayer.”

“Leave LA?”

“Yes.  You’ve succeeded in giving Angelus back his soul.  And Angel has spent the summer making a name for himself here.  He can take care of the evils of Los Angeles.”

“What about Lindsey?”

“Faith—this is a chance to start anew.  To get away from the pain here. Perhaps you need time away from Mr. McDonald.”

Faith did not say anything for a long time.  She wanted to be close to Lindsey, but every day she felt further pushed away.  Maybe if they spent some time apart things would change between them.  Maybe he would even miss her.  Lilith was right though. Angel could handle Los Angeles.

“Faith, what do you say.”

“I gotta think about it.”

“Good, think about it well.”

Faith nodded. But she wanted to stay.  Los Angeles was the only home she had ever known.
 

When Lina came in at 3pm, Lindsey moved from Cordelia’s desk to give her room to work.  He decided he was finished for the day.  Not that he had much to do.

“Hey, Lindsey,” Lina said and smiled.  Lindsey smiled back. Lina did not like what she sensed from Lindsey.  She sensed he was getting more and more despondent over Cordelia’s death and that seemed to be driving him further from Faith.

“Good afternoon, Lina,” he said.  She moved towards the desk and dumped her stuff on it.  Technically the desk belong to Lina, but Lindsey tended to use it more often and if Lina needed a desk she would use the one in Lindsey’s office.

Lina did not like Lindsey’s office.  No one did.  It was where Cordelia had died.  It was the only thing people understood about Lindsey not wanting to use his office.

“How you doing?”

“I’ve finished my work for the day,” he explained.  “I have to do some research for Alex at the Library.”

Lina nodded.  A lot of Alex’s cases had moved on to the supernatural on top of their regular cases, though the cases had decreased since Angel set up shop across town.  But they did not have a lot of the resources needed, so the library was always the best bet.

“That’s not what I meant,” she said.  Lina liked Lindsey.  He had helped her without asking for favors.  She knew Faith liked him even more. Lina thought Lindsey liked her in return, but lately she hadn’t been feeling it.

“I’m okay,” he said and sighed.  “I wish people would stop asking.”

“We are just worried,” Lina smiled.  “You don’t have to go through this alone.”

“I know.  Time will heal all wounds.”

Lina did not buy it, but she did not want to browbeat him.

“You look tired,” she said instead.  Lindsey’s hair that which had grown past his shoulders looked ragged and uncombed.  He had dark circles under his eyes.  His clothes did not even have a hint of professionalism.  He wore jeans and a t-shirt.  The jeans had a small hole on the left knee that got bigger every time he wore them.

He shrugged his shoulders.  He got up.  “I’m heading out.  You need anything?”

Lina shook her head.  Lindsey quickly departed the room.

When he was gone, Alex peaked her head out of the office.  Lina was sitting out Cordelia’s desk staring at the door.

“I’m worried about him, Alex,” she said.

Alex nodded.  “We all are.”
 

After Lindsey finished doing research, which wasn’t that much, he wanted a drink badly.  He did not want to go to Caritas because he was afraid that he might be there.  Instead Lindsey went to an old haunt.  A bar that he Lilah and Lee used to frequent when they were first starting out.  He had first found this bar with his friend Bradley.  It was the first time he had thought about Bradley in years.  Bradley had also been a lawyer who was working in the mailroom with Lindsey while they both did internships with Wolfram and Hart.  Unfortunately, Bradley had stolen some bonds from the company and had been arrested.  Lindsey hadn’t thought about him for a long time.  He wondered how he was doing and if he was out of prison.  He wondered if he should look in on him.

The bar was crowded.  There also catered to a demon clientele which was why Wolfram and Hart types liked it so much.

Lindsey sat at the bar and ordered himself a Tequila and Tonic.  No singing here.  He loved to sing.  Last night he had sang an old Johnny Cash song.  Cordelia had loved to hear his voice.  She had become mesmerized when he sang.  He loved looking at her beautiful face when he sang.  He would do anything to be able to do that again.

“This one’s on me,” said a male voice next to him.  Lindsey laughed.  Two days at different bars and he still hadn’t bought a single drink.  This voice was calm and confident, the voice of a lawyer.

“Howdy Gavin,” Lindsey said without looking over the Asian lawyer.

“Lindsey.  Been a long time since I’ve seen you here.”

“I’ve been busy.”

“I’ve heard,” he replied.  “You must be a risk taker, showing your face in here.  Not a lot of people here like you.”

“It’s a free country.”

“You are not very popular,” Gavin replied.  “Your activities with the slayer, sending Lilah to her death, getting the vampire’s soul back.  You’ve undone many of our important projects.”

“And yet Wolfram and Hart keeps asking me back.  Sorry,” he replied, chuckling.  He looked Gavin over.  Gavin was wearing a suit.  When Lindsey knew him, he seemed to have slept in his suit.  “I guess I was incompetent when I worked for Wolfram and Hart,” he replied.  “Glad I left when I did.” He turned back to the bar and drank the drink in one shot.

“I’m not that upset about both you and Lilah.”

“Yes,” Lindsey replied.  “I heard you were Holland’s new pet.”

“I am going to succeed where you and Lilah Morgan failed.”

“Oh leave him alone,” said an airy female voice.  This one Lindsey did not recognized.  Lindsey turned back around to see whom the voice belonged too.

Gavin smiled.  He put his hand out and pulled close to him a young pale extremely attractive blond woman.  She looked familiar to Lindsey, but he could not place her.

“He has that same human vulnerability that you do, Gavin,” the woman said.  “He thinks with his heart and not his brain.”

“I take it your not a human,” Lindsey said to her.

“I was once,” the woman said, a long time ago.  “So Lindsey, my dear, you seem so sad,” she glanced over him.  Lindsey could tell she was a vampire.  “But you aren’t afraid of me.  Why aren’t you afraid of me?  I could kill you easily.”

Lindsey wondered how the woman knew his name.

“Most mortals are terrified of me, even those who worship me,” she said, running her fingers through Gavin’s hair.

Gavin smiled.

Lindsey shrugged his shoulder.  “I’ve been killed so many times, the physical one should not even hurt.”

The woman smiled.  “So very philosophical, Lindsey.”

“Have we have met?” he asked, confused.  He would have remembered her if she was a client.  “Because you seem to know me.”

“Once, very briefly, I was naked and barely conscious.”

“What?” Lindsey asked, confused.

“In Sunnydale.”

The pieces came together.  This was Darla, Angelus’ sire whom he had brought back from the underworld last June.

“Oh, Darla.”  Lindsey really wasn’t afraid, although he knew that Faith would stake her.  “How are you doing?  And Drusilla?”

Darla nodded.  “I miss my family,” she explained.  “I miss Angelus.”

“He’s working over on Sunset, you should go visit.  Or yes, he would stake you, like he did four years ago.”

Darla looked mad, but did not say anything for a moment.

“You know what it feels like to lose someone incredibly close to you,” she said, then smiled.

“Shut up!” Lindsey said, suddenly getting angry.  “Don’t you dare compare Cordelia to that thing.”

Darla smiled.  She had gotten the reaction she wanted.

“Anyway Lindsey,” Parks said.  “My sources say you like to sing and frequented a bar called Caritas?”

“It’s a free country.  I can drink any where I want.”

“He was there last night and that’s why you’re here.”

“Whatever,” Lindsey said.  He ordered another drink.  “Maybe I was just sick of singing.”

“Please,” Gavin said, laying a bill down.

Lindsey sighed.  Why couldn’t he find a place to drink without being bothered by enemies and enemies who wanted to be friends?

“Gavin,” Darla said.  “Why don’t you leave me alone with Lindsey for a little bit.  I promise I won’t kill him.”

Gavin nodded and got up in a rush.

“Puppet,” Lindsey sneered at him.

Gavin did not respond he walked away.

Darla rolled her eyes when Gavin finally left.

“I’ve only been here for a few days and he hangs around me like some love sick school boy.  I like my humans with a lot more meat on their bones.”

“He’s only using you,” Lindsey said.  “I know him well.  You make a nice couple.”

“Like anyone could use me. Besides, he’s just a boy, what I need is a man.”

“If you are talking about me,” Lindsey said, downing his drink.  “I’m about Gavin’s age.”

“I’m not talking about you, silly,” Darla said and twirled her finger around Lindsey’s long brown hair.  Lindsey pulled her hand away.

“What?” she said and smiled.  “Don’t you like the feeling of a woman’s hand in your hair?”

Lindsey finished his drink.  He started to get up.  He was anxious to get away from her because she was stirring up bad feelings. Darla slammed his hand against the table.  Lindsey was unfazed.

“I could kill you as soon as you walk out of this bar.”

Lindsey pulled his hand away.  “I don’t care.  Good seeing you Darla.  Be very careful of Faith.  She’ll stake you without a moment’s hesitation.”
 

No vamps, no a single solitary one had shown up since Faith had shown up three hours ago.  She had passed the time reading a high school textbook on history that Lilith had given her.  She was going to take her GED next month.  She planned to pass it and then take a course or two at a community college.  She wanted to make Wesley to proud  of her.  He wanted her to go to school.  Lilith was encouraging about learning, but she wanted Faith to focus on Slayer interests.  Since Faith was only expected to live for a few more years, she should only know what she needed, but Faith had decided differently.  She wanted to act as if she was going to live a long life.  Slaying would be her job that’s it.  A job she had to do for 8 hours or so and then she would have her own life outside it.

She guessed she would have to not stake the vamps if she had another night like this.  Maybe they moved on to another spot.

She really did wonder if it had been her that kept them all away.

“Slayer—“ said a voice.

Faith turned around.

Sitting in a tree smiling was Drusilla.

“Oh,” Faith said.  “I didn’t know vampires grew on trees.”

“I’m not here to fight slayer,” Drusilla said.  “But to warn you that your fear campaign is over.”

“Uh oh, someone is a sore loser.  Why don’t you come out of the tree so we can talk beauty to ugly and when I say ugly, I mean you.”

Drusilla chucked.  “My dear, I am warning you, this will be our town soon.”

Faith laughed in response.   She leaned up against the tree Drusilla was in and held her stake up in case Drusilla tried to jump her.  “Let me explain to you how much Los Angeles is not yours.  Between Angel, Me and Gunn, you don’t have a chance.”

“Slayer, we will take care of all of you in due time.  I am just warning you.  Spikey has killed two slayers and me only one.  I have to catch up with him,” she said and laughed.

“You know Buffy and I abhor this competitiveness.  I’m pretty sure she’s killed far more vampires than I have.  I mean she was a slayer for two more years than I was.  I’d say she probably has about 100,000 more vampires staked than me.” Faith smiled.  “But who’s counting.”

Drusilla laughed.  “You are such a love slayer,” Drusilla explained.  “But you are right about the competitness.  Perhaps I will share your sweet blood with my dear sweet Spike.”

“So I guess you two are back together?  Damn shame.  I’m a firm believer in true love.  But you will be dead together.  So I guess that is romantic.”

Drusilla laughed.  Suddenly she jumped out of the tree and disappeared in the opposite direction.

Faith was sure in a moment she would wake up.  That this meeting was all a dream.

But a moment later she realized it was the middle of the night in a cold park.  She suddenly shivered and felt very alone.  She wondered if she should go to New York.  Give Lindsey some time away from her.  She missed him.  They saw each other every day, but it felt like it had been years since they’ve seen each other.

Chapter 4

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