2. A few clowns short of a circus
3. A few fries short of a happy meal
4. An experiment in artificial stupidity
5. A few beers short of a six-pack
6. Dumber than a box of hair
7. A few peas short of a casserole
8. Doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box
9. The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead
10. One fruit loop shy of a full bowl
11. One taco short of a combination plate
12. A few feathers short of a whole duck
13. All foam, no beer
14. The cheese slid off his cracker
15. Body by Fisher Price, brains by Mattel
16. Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt
17. Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear
18. Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel
19. He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down
20. An intellect rivaled only by garden tools
21. As smart as bait
22. Chimney's clogged
23. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash
24. Doesn't know much but leads the league in nostril hair
25. The elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor
26. Forgot to pay his brain bill
27. Her sewing machine's out of thread
28. His antenna doesn't pick up all channels
29. His belt doesn't go through all the loops
30. If he had another brain, it would be lonely
31. Missing a few buttons on his remote control
32. No grain in the silo
33. Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse
34. Receiver is off the hook
35. Several nuts short of a full pouch
36. Skylight leaks a little
37. Surfing in Nebraska
38. Too much yardage between the goal posts
39. In the great pinball game of life, his flippers were a little further apart than most
