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Absolutely Hairable:
One Man's Quest for a Stylish 'Do |
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5. The Headroom: 1999 |
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Pretty square hair, hey? The angularity of it all made me want to get a job fighting Cobra and Destro, while making 80's Coke commercials in my spare time. |
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6. Sophisticated and Gelly: 1993, 2000 |
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A couple times I've tried to take control of my destiny by gaining complete control over my hair. It works, but it takes a lot of gel. Then the whole thing gets crusty, and if someone (i.e. Kelly Shrinkwrap) crushes the gel, it can look pretty goofy.
I've finally decided that you don't control your destiny; your destiny controls you. The same thing should hold true for my hair. |
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7. The Conehead: 2000 |
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When I was in the Malaysian Highlands, I decided it would be a good idea to shave the ol' pate. I guess the oxygen was a little thin up there.
The result sort of looked like a cross between Patrick Stewart and one of the Coneheads, with an unfortunately predominent influence from the Conehead side of the family. How was I to know my head was so misshapen?
All in all, though, it was a pretty novel sensory experience. I recommend that everyone do it at least once, especially when they're far away from the worried looks of overprotective mothers.
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Fig. 1: Conehead. |
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Fig. 2: Captain Jean Luc Picard |
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Fig. 3: Captain John Luc Conehead. |
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Click Buddha's head to continue on the path to sphairitual enlightenment! |
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