Absolutely Hairable:
One Man's Quest for a Stylish 'Do
1. The Archijohn: 1979-1982
    In the early years, the development of a hairstyle that reflected my personal character was impeded by patchy baldness, an inability to hold a comb properly, and a complete lack of self-awareness.

     Somehow, though, I must've managed to carry the style well.  By 1985, my haristyle (and earstyle, come to think of it) was even showing up on the big screen (see right).
2. The Bowlcut: 1983-1986
     Later, I developed a style that expressed my profound respect for Luke Skywalker, for the Dukes of Hazzard, and for bowls.
      I don't think I ever got the correct amount of winging, which was likely a blessing in disguise.
Fig. 2:  Bowl and hedge shears: Tools of the trade for this kind of cut.
Fig. 4:  Bo Duke
Fig. 3:  Luke Skywalker
Fig. 1:  John, in very funny studio photo series  with a "Let's pretend my kid's a farmer" motif.
3. Stasis: 1986-1997
    From Grade Four on up to Grade Twelve, I pretty much stuck with the same thing.  The part was always on the left, but there was some variation: Amount of gel, severity of part, amount and severity of cowlick (see middle picture).

      Check out those lasers in the background of the first picture.  Gnarly, hey?
4. Into the Modern Era: 1997-Present
    Shortly after my High School graduation  photos, I got the 'do chopped and spiked it up.  A new John was born.  These photos approximate the style of the Modern Era.

     Since the development of the new John, there've been some forays into more "interesting" styles.  A representation group of these exphairiments are presented on the following pages.
Fig. 2:  Hair from the Neojohn Period, with concurrent (though unrelated) strabismus and macroglassia.
Fig. 1:  Bleached hair that's half grown-out.
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