swimming in the blog jar
a weblog

3:36 PM + It's time for the Friday Five!

1. Have you ever had braces? Any other teeth trauma? I've never had braces, and am happy to report I have straight teeth. An amazing accomplishment, as my mother was quite tired and couldn't bring us to cool dentists all the time. Only one of my sisters was cursed with bad teeth (my brother had braces), and I think it's because she's always been so stressed; I'm sure she ground her teeth a lot and pulled at them (yes, even as a wee child). Teeth trauma: two weeks before going to Berlin, I found out I needed a root canal because some idiot dentist put a filling too far in my tooth and thus cracked the root. I did not know this happened when I left after getting the filling, but four hours later, I couldn't see, my head was killing me, and I was crying uncontrollably. Jon came to get me in a crazy snowstorm and drove me the 25 minutes to the damn dentist. It was awful, especially since Jon is already a nervous driver, so with the snowstorm and me beside him crying uncontrollably--well, you can imagine. The dentist had the nerve to tell me I was putting HIM out by making him stay at the office later to fix it! I went to another surgeon and had HIM do the root canal, which still aches to this day.

2. Ever broken any bones? Never. Even when I was hit by a car going about 35 mph in a four-lane highway. I was 6, so I figure my inability to know the true danger made me more "relaxed" when I got hit and thus resulted in less injuries (that's why drunk drivers rarely are injured in accidents; they are relaxed and their body "goes with the flow").

3. Ever had stitches? I don't think so, though I used to always wish I could have them.

4. What are the stories behind some of your [physical] scars? I have three scars that always come with stories. The first is a small white dent high up on my forehead from the car accident told about above. The second is on the top of my foot. I wanted to "play with the boys" when I was about 8, only they wouldn't let me until I long-jumped over six large, full garbage bags. I was barefoot and in a skirt. I ran for it, made it, but landed on a piece of bottle-glass that flipped under my foot and stuck in the top of it. It bled like crazy; my mother was in hyterics. The third is on my index finger on my right hand. It's like a half-circle because I got it when I was six years old, the skin was then on my knuckle (weird, huh?); now it's right above wear a ring is. I was slicing an apple and the knife slid over the skin and went right in my finger. I swear I saw bone.

5. How do you plan to spend your weekend? Tonight, I'm either going to a university basketball game with Jon or I'm going to see a series of short films with my friend Kristi at the film school theatre. I see some shopping, maybe a haircut, and, yes, I will be attending the party on Sunday with my ex. I'm excited. He's a great guy and I miss him. That's what I care about. He was always there for me in high school and even when we were together, it was more about being friends than lovers. So I'm excited. Plus, I get to see all my old friends.

For my book readers, I have another chapter to post, so will most likely send an update email to you on Monday afternoon. Be warned! It's a list of my nostalgias. I like it and would love to post part as a blog, only to inspire others to do it so I can read what others rely on to remind them of their "childhood."

Be well!

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9:54 AM + I NEED YOUR HELP! For two years, I dated my best friend from high school. We lived together and the only reason it took me a long time to break up with him is because I loved his friendship (he wasn't good at being a boyfriend, but he was a wonderful friend). He hasn't talked to me for two years because I guess it hurt him pretty bad and he didn't want me around. Well, now he's engaged. He finally wrote to me after seeing my other webpage, which makes me incredibly happy, cause I really really miss him. I would love to see him. (He lives in the same city.)

But now he's invited me to the Super Bowl party he and his fiancee are having. Pro: I can see him and all the people I used to hang out with when were together. Con: I have to meet his fiancee and see him mushy with her.

Though I never want to be his girlfriend again, it makes me so nervous to see him with his new lady. What should I do? I really want to see him, but feel so strange! Please help... Please.

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Thursday, January 31, 2002

3:24 PM + My supervisor left! Yay! Ice is on the roads! Not Yay!

1) I'm wearing pants today that look good on me when I'm standing but climb up my crotch when I'm sitting and making me mad because I hate risking, in any way, a freakin' yeast infection.

2) Most of my life, I've had long hair. But about every third January, for the last six years, I've cut my hair super short. I can't wait for it to grow back. I'm hoping I got it out of my system and can finally let it grow back.

3) In high school, I took modern dance classes and loved it.

4) I love hemp necklaces and wish I were fashionable enough to know how I can wear them at work and still dress "professionally." (Any ideas?)

5) I love making things: crocheted, strings, collages.

I'm feeling tired and weary today. Jon has been incredibly stressed and making me moody. I understand his dissertation stuff is freaking him out and am trying to be patient while still being pleasant, but with my own personal problems sneaking up on me lately (being depressed and what not), it's difficult to be pleasant with a jerkface. Know what I mean, billy-jean?

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11:49 AM + Man, I hate when stuff like this happens. I put something to post and then blogger blitzed on me. So here it again: Shauna left an entry on Melissa's site regarding a website called Archive.org. Apparently, you can find your old templates on the site! I looked for mine (and my site is diaryland, which, when you change one day's template, forces all other past and archived pages to use that new template), and I found my old templates! It kind of stinks because if I wanted or needed to delete my journal, it will still be accessible through this site, but in another way, it's cool to see it. See if you can find yours!

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Wednesday, January 30, 2002

4:50 PM + I decided that I want to share five things about me with you every day. Just cause. Sometimes, when I do it, I'll put them in my journal. But it's fun to read those "100 things about me" quizzies and so have decided I'm doing it. Cause I want to. Today, by the way, I've been reading Yoga Journal at work (so very busy here, don't you know), and LOVE that magazine! Granted, it cost me $5.00, but it's very good to read.

Okay. Here are five things about me:

1) I have a tattoo. (A real one, Melissa Hee hee.). It's of a woman symbol in black. Inside the woman symbol is a lotus flower (searching for picture of lotus flower to link to) . . . (not happy with linked picture, but it will do). My lotus flower has pink and white petals, a green stem, and two green leaves on the underside of the flower. It's very vibrant and pretty. I will try to post a pic of it this week. I have some lovely slimy looking ones from when I first got it.

2) I have about 30 pairs of underwear. Of course, Kellie already knew this.

3) I only wear two rings at a time, never more. I used to wear, on one finger, a great native american-looking sterling silver ring with a band my foster mother gave me that was silver and copper. The native american-looking one was my favorite! It was a small turtle. The shell was tortoise (how do you spell that?) and the feet were silver balls. The head was aquamarine (topaz?). Very gorgeous. The band was given to me my first day at Mount Holyoke College.

4) My thumb nails always break first, then my index finger nails. The index finger nails grow weird. They are slim at the top while all the other have a great rounded, but not circlic (word?), shape. Get it? Uh-huh.

5) I drive stick (yeah, baby. You know what I'm saying. Kick it, kick it...) Heh heh.

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4:31 PM + I got a hit based on "vibrator experiences"!! Wahoo! I'm a woo-man, mama. A real woo-man!

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2:20 PM + Oh, Friends!! This journal is so great! I've been laughing the whole time I've been going back in the archives: And If I Die Before I Wake. He writes for his kids and about his kids so they can someday look back on it. How sweet, huh?

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11:46 AM + In the last paragraph of my entry where I talk about the ring, it was his lie that hurts. If I had known that he lied, perhaps I would have known about him sooner. Not the lie itself, cause that doesn't matter. His perception of what my love was based on, however--that would have been helpful to know.

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11:16 AM + I posted a new entry. Comments are, of course, welcome, and I guess in some way encouraged. No pressure.

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Tuesday, January 29, 2002

2:17 PM + Yeah baby. I always knew I had something of a gazelle in me.

Take the What
animal best portrays your sexual appetite?? Quiz

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1:48 PM + Woo hoo! Sexy new background in the journal and guestbook! M.O. spent all day testing Mac OS X on my computer and so I've been perusing the office walls for interesting vermin (total count 0, which I guess is good for the university, boring for me). Now I have the computer back and get my freakin' supervisor off my back (doesn't count in the bug count since she was on my back and not on the wall). Grrr... did by new issue of Self, and have to make corrections regarding my "hate glamour magazine." I don't LOVE glamour, but I do like the articles they publish (like: TRAP laws for abortion hospitals, women's health care in prison, ppd, etc.). It is Cosmo I can't stand. It seems insulting to me and petty. I never read through a whole one though, so maybe I'm jumping the gun. I have an issue and will be reading it. I do get amused with all the stories even though the people who "perform" the stories would not be my friends. I'd be too afraid of being stabbed in the back!

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Monday, January 28, 2002

2:30 PM + Hey there, friends. This is pretty darned funny. On another, more technical note: does anybody know how to make options in a pull down menu open in another window? Like the links to other journals on my journal page? What do you think of it, by the way? Do you have the trixie-plain font? You can download a typewriter font here for free. It is similar. I just have to go to my journal page right now and make sure that typewriter is an option.

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11:24 AM + I never posted my Friday Five on Friday because I was too busy crazily and hastily changing the layout of my journal, which, I'm proud to say, I'm not touching anymore! It looks better in IE 5, but only because the pull down menus have better borders in IE. For now, here's my belated Friday Five:

1. What cologne or perfume do you wear? I don't wear any perfume, unless you want to consider my Kiss My Face Patchouli deodorant, which really is enough. In high school, I wore Navy all the time and would probably consider wearing it again at some point. I'd love to have a "flavor," if you know what I mean. Right now, I imagine I always smell like my patchouli deodorant, and my olive oil soap (also Kiss My Face) and most likely a hint like my Jojoba shampoo and conditioner. I'm very "crunchy" in that way.

2. What cologne or perfume do you like best on the opposite sex? I love when men smell like old spice, but I also love when they smell a little manly, like hiking or dirt.

3. What one smell can you not stomach? Diary. I don't care what kind of dairy, I just can't take it. I hardly drink milk and when I do, have to drink it immediately. It repulses me. I use non-dairy milk (oat is my current favorite) for cereals and whenever I think Jon's milk is possibly going bad, I make him check. Cream cheese, cheese, cottage cheese, milk, yogurt...yick. I can't stand to smell it. Drink and eat it, yes. But quickly.

4. What smell do you like that others might consider weird? Well, obviously the patchouli. Especially men.They tend to dislike the smell even though it's considered an aphrodisiac. I also like how my armpits smell (heh heh...we are going for honesty here, right?) And I don't mean when I have deodorant on. I mean anytime. I don't shave, so the pheromones are vicious.

5. How do you plan to spend your weekend? Though it has passed, I spent it exactly as I planned but in a less stressful way. I drove 5.5 hours to visit my mother and had a very pleasant time with her. We watched The Road to Wellville and Sleepless in Seattle, played cribbage, and I made her dinner which she loved and we munched on a great salad. She made me a tempeh, lettuce and tomato sandwich. I was quite pleased with her vegetarian cooking. She made something I hadn't told her about! It makes me feel good that she's giving up meat for her and not because she knows it's an important thing in my life. I think that's great... Drove back on Sunday and watched Suicide Kings with Jon. GREAT movie.

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