March 25, 2004
Thousands to Lose Jobs in Latest Bush Action
From The News Agency, The People That Bring You The News
The already wobbling economy received another blow today as it was revealed George Bush has personally found a cure for cancer, Alzheimer’s and most forms of heart disease. Thousands of jobs in the health care profession are expected to be eliminated over the next ten years. "The potential damage is limitless" said one economist.
John Kerry reacted immediately. "This is a blatant attempt to politicize healthcare by a president who’s trying to boast his sagging poll numbers. George Bush has been an utter failure and all he can do is make an attempt to divert attention away from the issues that matter to real people. This is beneath contempt."
Gays and lesbians took to the streets in San Francisco to protest Bush’s action. "Cancer, Alzheimer’s and Heart Disease? What good does it do us if we’re going to die of Aids? He never even tried to cure that" said one protester. "Once again gays get stuck in the back seat" another commented sadly. Several in the crowd tried to take up the chant "Bush is a moron". And it’s not just in traditional "liberal" circles that this is being heard. Some Conservatives are joining in the ever growing chorus. "I like George Bush and respect him greatly. But I disagree with some of his decisions" admitted John McCain.
Ted Kennedy points out the big drug companies will likely benefit most from these new advances. "George Bush says one simple pill. But who gets those pills? And in what form will they be? How much are they going to cost? This administration has no answer. Enron, Halliburton, now the big drug companies. No answers. How many more bitter pills must America continue to swallow before we send George Bush back to Crawford, TX where he belongs?"
Republicans valiantly toe the party line and deny this development will hurt most Americans. Meanwhile leading statesmen in Congress have demanded Bush stop all research into curing the common cold until more is known about the dangers of such research.
- T.N.A.