| E. Al Pants ! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| June 2001 - Pants' Big Ass Movie Review page 6 - Adult movie recommendations for people who don't watch adult movies. |
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| Eeeeew! You entered the seedy back room with the saloon doors and the guy that's been loitering a little too long. Gross! People who like adult movies already know what they like. But if you don't like them, c'mon you have to see at least one before you die! And especially if you're only going to see just one, try to make it a good one, don't just pick one, or see one randomly at a party, because chances are, it sucks, just by the laws of probability. I won't admit to knowing much about the subject, but if you're going to pick one or two adult movies to see, just for a lark, get one that was produced before 1985 (they weren't kidding in "Boogie Nights." After they went to shooting on video, the whole industry made one big sucking sound, rolled over and died), and try to see one with an adult film legend*. Since I don't watch this filth ever, I checked with a friend, and here are a few legends and the classics in which they appeared. And for your morbid curiosity, I've also listed their attempts at breaking into the mainstream� |
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| LEGEND John Holmes Harry Reemes Linda Wong Desiree Cousteau Seka |
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| CLASSIC MOVIES Johnny Wadd, Eruption Deep Throat, The Devil in Miss Jones Oriental Babysitter, Jade Pussycat Inside Desiree Cousteau, Candy Goes to Hollywood Aunt Peg, Ultra Flesh, Careful He May Be Watching |
MAINSTREAM Night Screams Hot Dogs The Girl Who Spelled Freedom Caged Heat Night Screams |
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| *Note on Legends: Traci Lords, arguably the most infamous porn star, is not listed, and if you know why she�s infamous, you know why she�s not listed - none of her adult movies are available any more (nor should they be!), plus her movies were produced after the era we�re talking about so they don't fit the category anyway. Strangely (or perhaps predictably), she�s probably had the most success of any adult film star entering the mainstream, most notably in television on �Melrose Place,� �Profiler,� and �First Wave.� |
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| The now respectable Traci Lords and her posse from Sci Fi�s �First Wave� | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Heard of it just checking |
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| Top 27 a prime number |
Boring no they're not |
Personality can't we get along? |
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| Genres don't be a snob |
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