| turnipsday, 9november2000, 7:14am thehouseofbliss, hsv, ar. usa, earth... Back To Previous Journal Page man it seems like forever when last i worked on this site. i have so many brewing right now (6 in total, but only 3 active as of now) and i'm very busy working on a new story, completing the deadline material for the publisher, creating a media press kit for the john lennon collection, busy with work, busy at home (anticipating the visit of kelly's mom, lois, this weekend)...and to boot, the weather has been very crappy (cold rain and snow type of crappy), we're broke and kelly's birthday is monday and i don't know what i can get her...i wanted to buy her some diamond earring studs, but that's not possible this week...it's her 25th and i want to give her something very special...one thing i can give her, that i always like to give people, is something that i've made...i really enjoy making things for people and so i'm making a website for her...but, it being her 25th and all, i want to give her something symbolically important too. diamonds. earrings. good choice. not possible though...the fact that i bought us a diamond wedding band set this summer, and the cruise, and the coming x-mas spending season, diamond earrings are not possible. maybe i could find her a picture of diamond earrings and an i.o.u.? that's not a bad idea, along with the website and maybe a cd, a book, a piece of clothing or something... little maggie is up right now. i just put her in her seat next to me and we're grooving on some music (mostly random beatles in the cd changer)...julian is asleep on the sofa behind me and kel is soundly sailing in dreamland...it's still the same day outside, gray...sleet...faded clouds slowly illuminated by a confused sun. i've gotten a few emails from the infamous ken babbs. such a thrill for my be still my throbbing heart, ken babbs is like an icon in my fertile, twisted imagiNation. his legend looms large in my psche, like a giant dildo crushing the sillouette of my springtime adolescent moon. he is part character come to life, from a novel i read when i was treading on the edges of my adulthood. he is an obscure memory from 20 years ago, meeting in the lazy afternoon rays of a warm Portland summer sunshine. he is a conclusion, a compromise, a consequence and a concession at the end of my semi-autobiographical roadtrip novel and now he is this e-pal that i've enjoyed exchanging banal little messages with...how cool is life sometimes? i was just outside, shivering in my boxers, wrapped in this oversized terry cloth robe of kellys, my hairy feet smelling warmly in these nifty fleecelined leather slippers...having the third ciggie of the day and sipping on a cup of tepid black joe, thinking about babbs and kesey and the merry pranksters and what it all means to me. i had this fleeting feeling of remembering "who i am..." and "what i am supposed to do in life...". grandious thoughts, really, like gloriefied recollections from my oscarwilde, manic past. the tangent tripped across several years like jet lag crossing the time zones...and the next thought it lands upon is something like "just who EXACTLY do you think you are? and "what the fuck are doing, anyways" cold hard reality questions cutting to the chase like this bitter wind that rips through the folds of this over-sized robe i wear. Oh me oh my, i sigh, my mind takes flight and i cite a trite notion or two, wouldn't you? "We all shine on, like the moon and the stars and the sun..." and "i sure don't know what i'm going for but i'm going go for it, for sure..." my cigarette almost over, my coffee now gone cold, i shiver and think about old i've gotten in the last ten minutes. inside maggie is awaiting for her papa to come dance with her...so, you will excuse me while i oblige my little princess magnolia...the point of my story, by the way, is this; i've always tried to follow my bliss, you know? and this is where that has lead me, to right, at this moment, where i'm at, what i've got...for the better in my creative, imaginative self and for the worse of my estrangement, detachment and dis-association of many good, kind peoples in my life...for the richer of my soul, my love of my family and friends and for the pooer of my economic salvation in the intagible light of the almighty legal tender...despite the sickness of my manic-depression and for the healthy state of my heart and body...this is where i am. Where i go next remains to be seen, but i've got plans, you see...in meanwhile, "life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans..." Go To Next Page |