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Djinn 101
or
How to NOT give a mortal what he/she wants
For the beginning Djinn it may just seem simpler just to grant what the 'Master' (read as 'Chump') wants. Don't give in to these desires. If everyone got what they wanted all the time there would be millions of all powerful rulers in the world. What fun is that? Unfettered wish granting is one of the leading causes of Genie burnout. Remember you are in this for the long haul (all eternity). HAVE SOME FUN! Here are some simple guidelines or ideas to follow that still fall into the letter of the law:
REMEMBER THE VAGUE WISH IS YOUR FRIEND!
|
Money/Riches |
|
| Wish | Result |
| I wish for all the gold I can carry. | Paralyze his arms. |
| I wish to have a million dollars. | Transport him to a bank vault holding the money and set off the alarm. |
| I wish for a million bucks. | Stampeded by a herd of deer. (cvn88) |
| I wish I was rich. | Turn him into a guy named Rich, who just happens to be homeless. (Morpheus) |
| I wish I had a million dollars. | The results can be a million in old Confederate dollars...or Canadian. (Morpheus) |
| I wish for more money than I know what to do with. | Empty his intellect. |
| I wish to be rich and famous. | Turn them into the Czar of Russia in 1917. (Bad Irving) |
|
Sex/Transgender |
|
| Wish | Result |
| I wish to be surrounded by beautiful women all the time. | Make him a member of a harem. |
| I wish for the body of a girl. | Give him a corpse. |
| I wish to be surrounded by females with long hair. | Surrounded by long haired dogs. (Paula) |
| I wish to always feel a woman's soft skin against my body. | Turned into a pair of pantyhose. (Paula) |
| I wish I had a body every woman would desire. | Either: A. Turn him into a woman with a great body. or...
B. Give him a corpse made of gold. or.... C. DON'T turn him into a woman with a great body, make it a man instead (depending on desires of chump) |
| I wish I could become a buxom Japanese schoolgirl at will. | Nothing says he can stay that way or how long it will last. Or make the act of will suicide or something. |
| I wish to meet the worlds' most beautiful woman. | Let them meet when she is 50 with a dozen kids. |
| I wish for big boobs. | Give them a 70" bust line that hangs to their hips. (Bad Irving) |
| I wish for a beautiful sexy lover. | Give them a beautiful sexy lover of the same sex. (Bad Irving) |
| I wish to be a fantastic lover. | Turn into the opposite sex. That way they know what pleases the opposite sex most. (Bad Irving) |
| I wish I was a beautiful woman. | He becomes a beautiful woman in a tribe of Pygmies. (Bad Irving) |
| I Wish to have a pussy. | Turned into a TSR style clothes wearing animal human. Probably a cat creature. (Paula) |
| I Wish for a comfortable pair of heels. | Feet arch so you have to walk tip toe and never flat footed again. (Paula) |
| Wish to experience the joys of motherhood. | Turned into an Ant queen giving birth to over 200 Ants a day. (Paula) |
| Wish never to be covered in ugly body hair again. | Turned into a plastic, bald mannequin. (Paula) |
|
Altruism? |
|
| Wish | Result |
| I wish for world peace. | Fun with phonetics:
Give him a clump of dirt. (world piece) |
| I wish for world peace or to end world hunger. | For either of these, everyone on the planet could either suddenly drop dead or turn to stone. (Morpheus) |
| I wish a woman would finally be elected President of the USA. | Make a woman president of the Uruguayan Seamstress Association. |
|
Power/Attributes |
|
| Wish | Result |
| I wish I was real smart. | Make him 'real smart' in the past - a moron now. |
| I wish I couldn't be killed. | This wish doesn't say word about getting hurt |
| I wish I couldn't be hurt. | Turn him into an impervious statue. |
| I wish that I was happy for the rest of my life. | He becomes exceptionally happy, but doesn't have a thought in his/her head. A giggling Bimbo perhaps. (Morpheus) |
| I wish I didn't have to grow up. | Dead on the spot. |
| I wish to live forever. | Transport to the beginning of time. (MD) |
| I wish to be King of the world. | Transport to culture who ritually kill their kings. (MD) |
| I wish to be totally free of making choices in life. | End up being a robot, perhaps a maid that can only follow programming and not make choices. (Paula) |
| I wish I knew what I wanted. | Tell them, it wastes a wish. |
| I wish I had a body to die for. | Infect with gangrene. |
| I wish I was the strongest man in the world. | Give him the strongest smelling body odor of any man on the planet.
or
Transport him to Venus (He'd be the only man there and hence the strongest (for the few seconds he lived).
(Bad Irving) |
| I wish to have all the powers of a genie. | Turn him into a female, scantily clad genie of the lamp. (BeautifulJeannie) |
| I wish to never grow up. | Become one favorite cartoon heroine in reruns. (Paula) |
| I wish to live forever. | Turned into a paramecium. |
| I wish to swim like a fish. | Turned into a fish. or
Turned into a mermaid. (Paula) |
| TS wish for magic pair of hose that one doesn't even have to remove to go to bathroom. | Get wish but learn how bad having hose magically merged to the body in summer can be. (Paula) |
| I wish to live forever. | End up in a time loop where one remains a little girl forever. (Paula) |
| I wish for clear skin. | Make their skin transparent (just their skin) |
| I wish for a killer body. | Mind transfer with the body of a killer (on death row, of course) |
| I wish to know how women can stand walking in heels. | Turn into a pair of six inch pumps. (Paula) |
| I wish for clear skin. | Turn invisible. (thank goodness for heavy make up and nylons.) (Paula) |
| I wish to be thirty pounds lighter. | Cut off as much of their legs as needed. |
| I wish for a perfect memory. | Turn them into a computer. |
| I wish for a mind like a steel trap. | Fill their head with iron. |
| I wish for death or harm to someone. | Turn them into that person then follow through with their request. (Lampless) |
| I wish I could see his face. | Give them the head or face of (or turn them into) that person. (Lampless) |
| I wish for a long life. | Turn them into a housefly (whose longevity is about a week) (Lampless) |
| (Slang) I wish for all the chicks, bitches, babes, dolls, etc. I ever wanted. | Give them chickens, female dogs, babies, dolls, or whatever falls into the appropriate category. (Lampless) |
| I Wish to be a female that never have to shave her legs. | Turned into a dog or some other female. Maybe even one in heat. (Paula) |
| Wishing to become a Japanese schoolgirl at will. | Activates in the presence of someone named "Will", a "last will and testament" or when someone says "will". OR: gets trapped in a "Sailor Moon" just by thinking about it, or becomes an cartoon "Sailor Scout" in the real world. (Green Hornet) |
Any more? I'll add them in:
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