Where do the memories go
The ones to painful to be told
Too real to be ignored
Even after years of working on forgetfulness
They are there as if it were only yesterday
Waiting for their turn to unravel the mysteries
Of the undeniable
It is amazing when given time to speak
How easy it is to remember
The haunting sight and smells that no child should know
Things that have been triggers but the reasons have been alluded.
The feelings of anger, fear, pain and shame that were not allowed to be
Expressed
The freedom comes as the tears start to fall
Choosing to set aside years of self-protection
I find my freedom now dancing on the open fields with Jesus
As a little child dressed in white
Wearing a golden crown.
Forgiveness in the Wind
by Elizabeth Grace Lueking
You entered back into my life
With a smile that still edges deep into my soul.
You came with a hope and a song
Claiming Jesus set you free from your prison chains.
You came and spoke life into this soul,
That had long since given into deaths mortal cry.
You came and birthed a dream in me
That all was not lost
That there truly was a God who spoke from the heavens
You said we would be together forever singing love songs to Jesus
To all who would hear.
All around you knew you as Buddy Love
Because of the love that bubbled out of your soul
A love that could not be contained.
But just as quickly as the love grew in you
I saw it begin to fade
I saw the hope begin to wither
You claimed it was for some injustice that had once been done.
Until one day you were gone as quickly as you had appeared
Though this time you could never choose to return.
You surrendered to the lie
of deaths mortal cry.
Where do you go when your dreams have
Been shattered
How do you mend a wound that has no end?
My cries of forgiveness only fall to the wind.
This is dedicated to my cousin and close friend
Who committed suicide in April 1981