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Soviet Ghosts Mount Offensive in Afghanistan M.O.T. News
April 15 -- In the first strike of what is sure to be a sad and confusing war, long-dead Soviet forces attacked and killed at least four American soldiers in Afghanistan Sunday. Numerous others were injured. "We didn't see it coming,"
said one soldier who survived the assault. "One minute we're handling old
Soviet munitions -- next thing you know, we're getting blown up."
Witnesses report a "ghost" dressed in a "Communist uniform" smashed an old U.S.S.R. missile with a hammer, causing it to explode. The four American soldiers who were carrying the weapon died immediately. "I never saw anything like that," stated an anonymous survivor. "Now, I'm scared. I want to go home." Echoes of cheering could be heard from the old offices of the Politburo. One witness claimed he saw Khrushchev pounding his shoe on the wall, and Breshnev dancing a jig. It was unknown if U.S. ghost soldiers
would be called in to counteract the dead Soviets. General Macarthur is
reportedly ready for action.
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