Earth-Wonderful Officially Declared

Daily Balance News

July 25 -- The governing bodies of the Free World have declared a new timeline: Earth-Wonderful.

"It's wonderful!" yelled an unnamed source from the F.W.G. "I feel like dancing through the tulips! Yippee!"

The declaration has brought about many spontaneous celebrations around the world.

"The people are truly happy," said Juan Arasa, president of Argentina. "We are truly happy to be part of this monumentous moment in the history."

"Sign me up for ten solid years of this timeline," said the Gambler, from his ranch in Nevada. "This is great!"

It is unknown who will be writing Earth-Wonderful, but all signs seem to point to either Mr. Rogers, Big Bird, the old "Blues Clues" guy, the Purple Teletubby, or Clifford the big red dog.