On The Jazz
On The Jazz Newsletter: Volume 2 Issue N°14

Date: April 9, 1996
Author: Nicole Pellegrini
Download: otjv02i14.zip

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The totally unofficial A-Team electronic mail newsletter
***** Now in it's second year of publication !! *****

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Administrivia: Nicole Pellegrini
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*Home of the On the Jazz Newsletter Archives**
DATE:   April 9, 1996
ISSUE:  14
Howdy folks!

Well, I don't have a heck of a lot to report this week, mainly because things related to the A-Team Philly Party and the new PSV issue have been keeping me busy, but here we go anyway...

There was a reported sighting of Mr. T on the new Dana Carvey show last week. I missed it and haven't heard anything more about what exactly transpired, so if anyone can supply details that would be great. I suppose considering that this is T's second appearance on TV in recents days (the first being on Jay Leno a few weeks back), it's safe to say that whatever health problems he may be or had been suffering from aren't keeping him down. But please keep an ear open for any new information as I will...

Thanx to the many people out there who have participated in the drive to get A-Team videos released via Columbia House, we may actually be making some real progress! Some people who have called recently reported to me that CH *is* taking notice of our many requests, and a decision may be made soon. The fact that this is an organzied campaign may help as well - if you call or write in upcoming days, you may wish to mention your connection to this fan club/mailing list to let them know how serous our interest is in this. Once again, the address is: Columbia House, 1400 North Fruitridge Ave, P.O. Box 1114, Terre Haute IN 47811-1114, and the phone number is 1-800-457-0866. Keep at it, guys, and pass along any news you might get on the subject!

As mentioned earlier, this past weekend I hosted the 2nd semi-frequent A-Team Philly Fest. Thanx to those of you who came, we had a small but fun gathering. If you missed this one due to the holiday weekend or whatever, take heart, I will throw another one this summer if people are interested. So stay tuned (and if you might be interested let me know, also what dates during July/August would definitely be preferable/impossible...)

Finally this week, last issue I gave the cost for Plans Scams & Vans 2 for shipment within the US, now I have the costs for foreign delivery. Prices are (in US currency, which is *strongly* preferred for orders): Europe: $15.00, Asia/Africa: $16.00, Pacific Rim: $16.50, West Hem (except Can/Mexico): $13.75, Canada/Mexico/US: $12.50. That's with the "Onthejazz" discount.

And remember, it's open season for submissions for the next issue of "Plans Scams and Vans," and also our special all X-Files/A-Team edition. If you need information on guidelines, deadlines, etc. for either, email me privately. Come on, we've had TONS of crossover and finale-movie ideas getting tossed around the message reflector list lately, so why don't you think about actually writing them out so other A-Team fans can enjoy them?

Yup, it's the return of the newsletter trivia question! Send me your answers and if you're the first one in with the right answer, you'll... well, get mentioned in the next issue and can show off what an A-Team trivia expert you are!

This week's question is...
> Face and Murdock both dressed up like nuns to sneak into the convent during episode "The Only Church in Town." But in which episode did Hannibal dress up as a cigar (and gun) toting nun? (Accurate episode description will suffice if you don't rememebr the title.)

Now, on to part 2 of 2 of...

Smugglers' Blues
by Laura Michaels

(Note: This originaly appeared in "Our Favorite Things," Issue #4)
                       *     *     *
He told MacGyver what the jazz was like on the way to the smugglers' office. MacGyver got a feel for the concept, but wasn't quite sure he understood it all.

They walked into the office. Only one person, dressed entirely in black, was present. That put the odds in their favor. The two of them should have no trouble handling one smuggler should anything go wrong. He waited by the door, as Face had told him, while the lieutenant went to talk to the man. MacGyver wasn't close enough to hear what was being said, but Face did gesture in his direction once. He wasn't so sure he'd want to hear what the two were talking about.

Another man walked in, saw Face, and pulled a gun. "Hey Darth! That's one of those nuts who started shooting at us last time," he said.

/Trouble/, thought MacGyver. He knocked the gun out of the man's hand and a fist fight broke out between the four people in the room. It didn't last long. Some of the men's friends heard the noise and arrived on the scene with guns.

"I could've talked our way out if you hadn't gotten gallant and started a fight," Face told MacGyver. He knew full well he'd have done the same thing if he were in MacGyver's place.

The smugglers ignored the comment. "This one interrupted our last job," the man who had pulled the gun said, "but I don't remember the other one."

"Maybe you just didn't see him, Panthro," Darth replied.

MacGyver and Face realized they were using nicknames. It made sense they wouldn't want to use their real names while on business. Panthro was large, had a dark complexion, and carried a nun chaku with him, which incidentally are illegal weapons in certain states.

"No. I don't think he was there," another smuggler said. "I do know this guy's with the A-Team."

Face instantly disliked this guy.

"Those mercenaries? They're trouble, Kor."

"Couldn't be that much trouble if we caught one, Herc," Kor continued. "Besides, they're worth twenty thousand."

"Yeah, but don't you need all three to collect?" asked Herc.

"We can get all three of them," Kor replied. "We use this one as bait. Let's leave him at the warehouse."

All of the smugglers except Darth and Herc left. They took the lieutenant with them.

"What do we do with him?"

"I don't know, Darth. We don't even know who he's working for."

"Herc, he's working for this A-Team."

"Doesn't look like a mercenary to me. Let's keep him, and let the boss decide what to do with him," Herc suggested.

"Where should we take him?"

"We've got another load going out this afternoon, right Darth?" The smuggler nodded. "No sense taking him anyplace. We'll lock him up in an empty room here. That way we can keep an eye on him 'til then. The boss can tell us at the hangar what he wants done with him."

They took MacGyver to an empty room upstairs and locked it.
                       *     *     *
Murdock saw Face being escorted out of the building and into a car. He returned to tell the Team.

"What do we do, Hannibal?" B.A. asked.

"We follow the car and see where they take Face."

"What about MacGyver?" Murdock inquired.

"Did you see them take him anywhere?"

"No sign of him," Murdock answered.

"Then he's still inside. We can rescue him once we've got Face back. Try not to get spotted, B.A."

B.A. ignored the last comment. They were all very experienced in this sort of thing by now. They tracked the car using the homing device. They stopped a block away from the warehouse. The smugglers brought Face in and left.

"They couldn't 've done anything to Face that quick," B.A. commented.

"They just left him there for now. They'll come back later and try to question him. Boy, will they be surprised when he's not there," Murdock said.

"I don't think so, Murdock. Why didn't they leave MacGyver with him?"

"MacGyver might be in an awful lot of trouble," Murdock replied, worried.

"I think we're the ones in trouble," Hannibal contradicted.

"So what's the plan?" B.A. asked.

"We sneak up on the place, and give any welcoming committee a welcome they'll never forget."

The Team split up and carefully crept up on the building. They easily made it inside and started taking out, one by one, the smugglers who had stayed behind to ambush them. One managed to yell out, which alerted those not yet caught by the Team of their presence.

Face was tied and gagged. Concealed behind some nearby crates, Kor cleverly came out of hiding, brought his gun to bear on the lieutenant, and told the A-Team to surrender or Face would get killed. The Team reluctantly surrendered. Hannibal could always come up with some plan to get them out of trouble.

The smugglers began to tie up the rest of the Team.
"I'm not sure the ropes will hold this big guy," Kor said after looking B.A. over. "Better handcuff him, Kahn."


"They've got another one," Panthro commented about Murdock's presence.

"Just leave him with the others. We'll take care of them all later," Kor replied.

"That was an easy twenty thousand," said Khan.

"And they won't be interrupting our jobs anymore," Kor said as the smugglers left the warehouse.

"That's what you think," Murdock replied. He knocked a bottle over and used a shard of glass to get his ropes off. Then he started to work on Face's ropes. "You still have your lock pick?" Murdock asked as soon as the lieutenant's gag was off.

"Yeah. You'd think those guys would be smart enough to check for things like that," he answered as he rubbed his sore arms.

Murdock went to release Hannibal. In no time at all, Face had the cuffs off B.A., and the sergeant needed little help in getting his ropes off.

"We should help MacGyver," Murdock reminded them. "He could be in real trouble."

"He was fine when I left," Face told them.

B.A. had gone to a window to check outside. "We should worry 'bout gettin' ourselves out first. Some of them smugglers stayed behind. They're outside watchin' this place."

"Sometimes having a reputation for being good at escapes can be a nuisance," Hannibal commented. He looked over an old, wrecked vehicle that had been left behind in the warehouse. "Well, B.A.?"

B.A. began to look it over too. "Can do," he answered.

"Here's the plan," Hannibal told his Team. "We get out of here. Go back to the motel to regroup and get supplies together. Then we go after MacGyver and shut down this smuggling operation once and for all."

"We've got some extra guns and ammo in the van," Face reminded them.

"Let's do it," said Hannibal.

The smugglers used the warehouse frequently, and an accumulation of tools as well as odds and ends could be found. The Team started fixing and armoring the broken-down, old vehicle. They also put together makeshift cannons and as many workable weapons as they could out of the junk that had been left behind.

They got everything ready to crash through the doors of the warehouse, get back to the van, and head for the motel without being followed. The plan worked without a hitch.
                       *     *     *
MacGyver was sitting in the room waiting for the Team. "The escape wasn't bad, but personally, I don't like guns that much," he said amiably.

"How'd you get here?" Face asked, worried.

"Yeah, we were gonna go rescue you," Murdock added, disappointed.

"Me? I got loose an hour ago. They shouldn't leave electric wires around an outlet. I was going to help you out, but you seemed to be doing so well. I loved your exit from the warehouse."

"That's enough of a reunion," Hannibal put in, eager to get everyone back to business. "Let's take care of those guys."
"Not so fast," MacGyver interrupted. "We can't just go in after them."

"Right, we need a plan," Murdock agreed. "Hannibal?"

"That's not what I mean. You don't just go in and rough up those guys. We've got to find enough evidence and get them arrested legally."

"See, Hannibal. He's trouble," B.A. complained, still distrustful of MacGyver.

"Look," Face explained, "we've always done things our way. Sure it's different, but we've never had any trouble getting the job done."

"Yeah, Hannibal's plans always come together," Murdock defended, "in a way."

"Let's get back to business," Hannibal reminded them.

"It won't work," MacGyver interrupted. He didn't understand why he wanted to keep arguing with them. "You've bugged the bar and their vehicle and you've been shooting at these people." MacGyver continued, ignoring the surprised look he got from Hannibal when he mentioned he'd figured out about the surveillance devices. "How do you expect anything to hold up in court? You do realize, the methods you're using to catch them are illegal."

"You do realize, we're wanted men," Hannibal informed him. "Let me explain things to you, MacGyver. Those smugglers we're going after, they're slime walking our streets. They aren't out there to help people. It's very likely, every minute they're loose, the chances increase they'll get people hurt. All we do is take them off the streets and send them to jail where they belong."

"But the way you do it...."

"Works," Hannibal finished for him. "Maybe you and the cops can't use such methods, but we can and do. We get evidence any way we can, and we catch those criminals as soon as possible, before innocent bystanders get hurt. Don't tell me the cops, who really care about what's going on, wouldn't love to do the same thing."

"That's just it. They don't. Sure it's hard, but we have to work within the law to protect everyone's rights."

"You think those smugglers should be on the street?" Hannibal asked.

"No, of course not...."

"We're not your ordinary vigilantes. We don't pick and choose who we consider are criminals. We get the evidence and prove they're criminals. And in case you haven't noticed, we don't dispense our own justice. We let the law take care of it, and decide who's innocent or guilty. We just get them the criminals and the evidence they need to act. No one gets hurt."
"I can't argue with that." He couldn't change the way the A-Team operated. It was unusual and difficult enough that they should be catching criminals when they themselves were wanted. The important thing was that no one got hurt.

"Good." Hannibal addressed everyone, "We've had enough philosophical debates for today. Let's go get those guys."

At that, the rest of the A-Team who had been sitting around acting bored and trying to ignore the argument got up and seemed anxious for action.

"I should've brought my comic book," Murdock complained about the inactivity as they left.

"Where are we going?" B.A. asked as he started the van's engines.

"They said something about another load of drugs going out," MacGyver mentioned. "Their boss should be there too."

"The private airport. We've picked up quite a bit of information about their operation these past few days," Murdock explained to MacGyver. "Basically, they use small planes to deliver their loads and what better place to find them than there."

"Sounds good," MacGyver replied. "I think I remember them mentioning something about a hangar."

"I'm not flying," B.A. complained.

"No one's flying today, B.A.," Hannibal replied. "Not us and not those smugglers. Step on it." The van sped off to catch up with the Team's quarry.
                       *     *     *
As they drove, MacGyver thought over what he'd found out about the A-Team. It was now obvious why the Team drove around in vehicles that were so easy to spot. From what he'd seen of their escape from the warehouse, catching them was easy, but holding them was next to impossible. They could afford to advertise their whereabouts like some World War II ace pilots used to do. They seemed to enjoy the added sense of danger.

As Face had said, they were on the jazz, all of them. Somehow, MacGyver couldn't see them ever going straight. They'd never be able to give up their current lifestyle; they wouldn't want to. Probably, if they were ever pardoned, they'd find something else to get in trouble for and go right back to living that way. They'd be too bored otherwise.
                       *     *     *
They reached the airport. They found the smugglers in a hangar, preparing to send their next shipment. The key personnel in the operation were there, just as Hannibal and the Team had wanted. This time surprise was on their side. Now all they needed was no more interruptions from the police until they had all the loose ends taken care of.

They had offered MacGyver a gun. He didn't accept. It didn't seem like it would have been much use anyway. There were too many of them. MacGyver figured the only way they could handle this situation, without getting hurt, was to divide and conquer.

The A-Team was thinking along the same lines. B.A. pointed to some rope used for securing crates. He and Hannibal started to set a trap with it. The rest of the Team followed their lead and MacGyver joined in. Ten minutes later, they had all sorts of obstacles set up to catch the smugglers. The hard part would be getting them to walk into the traps.

Murdock walked up to the smugglers before MacGyver realized what he was doing. He yelled, "Your momma wears army boots." He then quickly ran off in the direction of one of the readied traps. Some of the smugglers followed. Boxes fell down in the opposite direction from which Murdock had run; B.A. had shoved them. Other smugglers dispersed in that direction to investigate.

MacGyver and the A-Team busily tripped up the smugglers with ropes, dropped crates, powder, and other objects on them, and generally made a nuisance of themselves.

When the smugglers realized something strange was going on, the Team quickly changed tactics. They took the criminals on in hand-to-hand combat. B.A. was tossing smugglers around like they had no weight at all. The others were holding their own even though they were outnumbered. Face was having some trouble though.

The rest of the Team were too busy to help him out. MacGyver got the man off Face's back by punching him hard. He left the unconscious smuggler out of the way and placed a crate on top of him to keep him there. Then MacGyver helped Face up.
"Thanks," the lieutenant said earnestly.

"Any time," MacGyver answered congenially.

They didn't have time to continue the conversation because two more tough smugglers arrived on the scene. Face and MacGyver worked together to take care of them as well.
                       *     *     *
The whole operation took about twenty minutes. At the end of it, the smugglers were all neatly tied up and left with their evidence for the police.

"You're pretty good in a fight, MacGyver," Face told him.
"Thanks. If I could use the phone in your van, I'll get the police to take care of this little mess for you," he offered.

"Yeah, but just make sure we ain't around when they show up," B.A. warned.

"Can we drive you somewhere?" Murdock offered. B.A. gave him a look that said he wished he hadn't.

"No. I think I'll stick around 'til the police get here."
"You know, working with you wasn't too bad," Hannibal commented. "Maybe we'll see you on another job."

"Yeah, we could get together and do this again sometime." MacGyver thought there was a good possibility of that occurring; after all, Los Angeles wasn't that big.

"We may just call you if we ever need help from someone who isn't wanted, or if we need someone to talk to the cops for us," Hannibal added. Obviously, the colonel had decided he didn't mind MacGyver's help after all.

"Hey, and maybe we could get together and double date," Face suggested. He appreciated the help MacGyver had given him in the fight and made the gesture to show he wanted to be friends. "I know this great French restaurant on the other side of town."

"Yeah, I think I know the place," MacGyver replied. "We'll have to get together." In the past, he must have been to some of the same places as the A-Team, maybe even at the exact same time, and hadn't even known it. He had the feeling he'd see them again, especially Face, and this time he'd make sure to notice.
"Don't you love it when a plan comes together?" Hannibal
said to MacGyver, with a smile.

"Man's on the jazz again," B.A. complained, but actually they were all on the jazz, even MacGyver. The A-Team headed for their van so they wouldn't be around when the police arrived. "He ain't bad for a cop," B.A. told the Team as they left. He said it loud enough for MacGyver to overhear.
                       *     *     *
/Well/, MacGyver considered after he heard the van leave. /Here I am with a dozen smugglers, and I can't give the A-Team any of the credit for it./ He realized while working with the A-Team to catch the criminals, that maybe their methods weren't quite as different as he had liked to think. He had gotten a very good feeling from it, too. They had a lot in common when it came to on-the-spot improvising, and it felt great to work as a team with them.

Maybe he had argued so much with Hannibal earlier because it was hard to accept that these guys were on the other side of the law, but operated in a manner so similar to his own. Well, after the good job they'd done together, MacGyver didn't feel so bad about it.

/Guess I'll have to figure out some way to explain this to Pete./ He decided not to tell anyone about the way the Team operated or that they worked with another man that no one seemed to know about. /It shouldn't be that hard to convince the police and the CIA that the A-Team wasn't working with these guys. Maybe I can get Pete to pull a few strings and help them out a little with the military./

As strange as their story about the incident in Hanoi sounded, MacGyver was beginning to think it might just be true. If they kept helping people out and putting away criminals, they might get pardoned some day. /It wouldn't be bad if they could get pardoned. They could always do some jobs for the U.S. in a foreign country. That just might keep them out of trouble. Come to think of it, Pete's always complaining he doesn't have enough good operatives around. If I could just figure out a way to get Pete to give them some of the work load, I might finally get a well-earned vacation./

The End.
Next issue, I've got a *really* out-there story for everyone's enjoyment, thanks to Jenna Russel, one of the original members of The A-Team Appreciation Society in England. I think you'll all get a real kick out of it.

Until then, keep on truckin' and stay on the jazz...
Quote of the week:

Decker:    "Looks like this is it, Smith"
Hannibal:  "It always looks that way, doesn't it?"
                          from "Incident at Crystal Lake"

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