Page Three
"Look out! Muppets!"
"I hope you try to bluff me Mr Robie and then I can have the fun of telling you how clever I was."
"Since I'm not Mr Robie but Mr Burns, there would be hardly any point in trying to bluff you. Nevertheless, tell me how clever you were."
"Well, the first thing I noticed about you was-"
"Don't sound so pleased with yourself."
"I've never caught a jewel thief before, it's stimulating, it's like, well it's like..."
"Like sitting in a hot tub?"
"Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?"
"Asps. Very dangerous. You go first."
"You were caught trying to steal the Shakra stones. There were five stones in the beginning. Over the centuries they dispersed by wars, sold off by thieves like you."
"Thieves like me huh? Ha! You're still missing two."
"A century ago when the British raided this temple and butchered my people, a loyal priest hid the last two stones down here in the catacombs."
"So that's what you've got these slaves digging for huh? They're innocent children."
"They dig for the gems to support our cause. They also search for the last two stones. Soon we will have all the five Shakra stones, and the Thuggies will be all powerful."
"What a vivid imagination."
"You don't believe me? You will, Dr Jones. You will become a true believer."
"I will take the book now."
"What book?"
"You have the diary in your pocket."
"You dolt! You think my son would be that stupid? That he would bring my diary all the way back here? You didn't did you? You didn't bring it did you?"
"Well I..."
"You did."
"Look, can we discuss this later?"
"I should have mailed it to the Marx Brothers."
"Will you take it easy."
"Take it easy? Why do think I sent it home in the first place? So it wouldn't fall into their hands!"
"I came here to save you!"
"Oh yeah? And who's going to come to save you, Junior?"
"I told you...don't call me Junior!"
"Barbara, I swear I'm telling the truth. Do I look like a sex murderer to you? Can you imagine me creeping around London, strangling all those women with ties? Well it's ridiculous. For a start I only own two."
"Talk. I said talk!"
"I'm not your wife."
"The hell you're not."
"I swear to God I never saw you before six weeks ago. Our marriage is just a memory implant."
"You think I'm stupid? I remember our wedding."
"It was implanted by the agency."
"Falling in love..."
"Implanted."
"Our friends, my job, eight years together. I suppose all this was implanted too?"
"The job's real. The agency set it up."
"Bullshit."
"They erased your identity and implanted a new one. I was written in as your wife so that I could watch you and make sure the erasure took. Sorry Quaid, your whole life is just a dream."
"Mr Han?"
"You fought well yesterday. Your style is unorthodox."
"But effective."
"It is not the art, but the combat that you enjoy."
"The winning."
"We are all ready to win, just as we are born knowing only life. It is defeat that you must learn to prepare for."
"I don't waste my time with it. When it comes, I won't even notice."
"Oh? How so?"
"I'll be too busy looking good."
"So you see there's very little sense in maintaining this fiction that you're deceiving us any more than we're deceiving you, Mr Caplin."
"I don't suppose it would do any good to show you a wallet full of identification cards, driver's license, things like that."
"They provide you with such good ones."
"It's getting late, I have guests. Do you intend to co-operate with us? I'd like a simple 'yes' or 'no'."
"A simple 'no', for the simple reason that I simply don't know what you're talking about."
"Look they're right on our ass. We've gotta get out of here."
"Can't tell where they're coming from, we don't want to run into them."
"No no no it's too bright up there. You might as well stick a target on your back."
"What are we gonna do?"
"..We've gotta make a stand. It's our only chance of getting out of here alive. I always wondered how I'd do in combat, could I cut it. You ever wondered about that Frank?"
"Guess I'm about to find out."
"Mike, they've got guns. We have nothing!"
"Screw the guns! We watch each other's backs, we'll be...we'll be ok."
"You live well Scaramanga."
"At a million dollars a contract I can afford to, Mr Bond. You work for peanuts. A hearty well done from Her Majesty the Queen and a pittance of a pension. Apart from that we are the same. To us, Mr Bond. We are the best."
"There's a useful four-letter word, and you're full of it.
"Charlie, ever since we got on this train you've been like a dummy. What?"
"Ok, ok I'll tell you. You know Lee, I've hit a few guys in my time."
"True."
"And if they had a chance they always ran. But he just stood there and took it."
"First thing you taught me was never to think about a job, Charlie."
"And another thing, I recognised him the minute I saw him."
"Well yeah but he was a hot-shot race driver, named Johnny North, everybody knew him. So what? The only thing that counts is we're twenty-five thousand ahead of the game."
"Yeah that's another thing. Twenty-five thousand for a simple hit. We walk in, we put him down, we walk out. That's a lot of money for a simple hit."
"Not for me it isn't."
"And he knew we were coming. That dame must have gotten to her phone because he was tipped off. But he just stood there."
"Give me that pistol, Mister."
"Huh?"
"I says give me over your pistol."
"Well, I ain't drunk."
"Ordinance says you got to turn in your firearms to the county office, day or night. I guess you didn't see the sign with the weather and all."
"No. But I ain't...I ain't armed."
"What about your friends upstairs? They got any pistols?"
"I don't know. No, I guess...No. They ain't armed either."
"Uh-huh. Spilled your whiskey?"
"Look, I said-"
"What's your name?"
"William Hendershot."
"Well, Mister William Hendershot, what if I was to say you was a no good son of a bitch and a liar?"
"Hello?"
"Janelle it's me.
"John?
"Yeah. Is everything alright? Are you guys ok?"
"Sure honey, everything's ok. Are you alright?"
"Yeah I'm fine."
"John it's late. Honey I was beginning to worry about you. If you hurry home we can sit down and have dinner together. I'm making beef stew."
"Something's wrong, she's never this nice."
"Where are you?"
"What the hell is the goddamn dog barking about? Hey! Shut up you worthless piece of shit!"
"The dog's really barking."
"I thought you were going to tell the kid to get rid of that fucking mutt."
"John, honey, it's late, please don't make me worry."
"Could he already be there?"
"Honey are you ok?"
"I'm right here."
"Are you sure you're alright?"
"What's the dog's name?"
"Max."
"Hey Janelle, what's wrong with Wolfie? I can hear him barking. Is he ok?"
"Wolfie's fine honey, Wolfie's just fine. Where are you?"
"...Your foster parents are dead."
"Consistant reports from witnesses to the effect that people who acted as though they were in a kind of trance were killing...and eating their victims, prompted authorities to examine the bodies of some of the victims. Medical authories in Cumberland have concluded that in all cases, the killers...are eating the flesh of the people they murder. Repeating this latest bulletin just received moments ago from Cumberland, Maryland, civil defence authorities have told newsmen that murdered victims show evidence of having been partially devoured by their murderers."
"My attorney's on his way and we both know I'll be out of here in 20 minutes on bail, so take off these cuffs and open the door!"
"I wouldn't worry about the door Muzz. The kind of scum who'd represent you would just ooze right under it."
"Look Joe, why don't you go and get a couple of cups of coffee. I know I could use one. You want anything Muzz?"
"Chewing gum, Snickers bar, and my attorney, badge kisser!"
"...Well, Emil. I guess it's just you, and me...your balls...and this drawer."
"Silly Caucasian girl likes to play with samurai swords. Bill might have humored you, but you will find neither humor nor mercy at my blade. Now unless you intend to commit sepeku among the koi, stand up and fight. You may not be able to fight like a samurai, but you can at least die like a samurai."
"Attack me. With everything you have."
"It appears to the United States Parole Commission that....Poe....man....oh yeah...."
"Put the bunny back in the box."
"I knew you was a punk, and I was right. You been playing us all along. You a free man."
"I said, put the bunny back in the box."
"I fell into the bay and you fished me out?"
"That's right."
"Thank you."
"You don't remember."
"No, I..."
"Do you remember where you were?"
"Yes, yes of course I remember that. Then I must have hit a dizzy spell and fainted."
"Where were you?"
"At Old Fort Point, out at the presidio. Of course I remember, I often go there."
"Why? Why do you go there?"
"Because I love it so, it's beautiful there. Especially at sunset..."
"Hey! All right Agnus. Listen now, big chance for you now. Win a whole
lotta prizes. Ya know we've still got two crack stalkers out there.
Dynamo and Fireball. Who do you think will make the next kill?"
"Oh boy, that's a tough one."
"Come on, give it a try. You can do it. Who do you think?"
"Okay...I think...the next kill will be made by...Ben Richards."
"Hold it, hold it. Agnus, Richards is a runner. You've got to pick a
stalker."
"I can pick anyone I choose, and I choose Ben Richards. That boy's one
mean motherfucker."
"Hey motherfucker what the fuck you doin'? I said what you doin'?"
"Nothing. I thought, I..."
"You thought what?"
"I saw, I saw your friend fall."
"Nigger weren't my friend. Who are you man, what you doin' here?"
"What the fuck you lookin' at me for, the man asked you a question, what the hell are you doin' here?"
"Nothing, I'm just here, I'm not looking for trouble."
"Is that right?"
"You fuckin' with us white boy?"
"No man, like I said I'm not looking for trouble."
"Bullshit."
"Now I'm gonna ask you one more time...what in the fuck are you doin' here?"
"He's spying man."
"I'm not spying. Look I don't wanna get in the middle of no big gang hassle."
"Gang? You think we're some punk ass gang?"
"I'm a businessman. These are my associates."
"Come in."
"You boys wanted to see me?"
"Yes Mr. Townsend. We would like to change apartments."
"Goddamn! Now what the hell you boys done in here?"
"My friend Semi has altered the apartment and we would like to exchange it for another."
"This stuff ain't hot is it?"
"Oh of course not sir. It's just that I am going to bring a young lady up, and I cannot let her see me living like this."
"I tell you what. I'm gonna let you boys stay in my apartment, and I'll move up here."
"Does your apartment look poor?"
"Yeah it's a real shit-hole. You'll love it."
"Where's Rand"
"In heaven."
"The body, where's the body?"
"Shhh...the body is in the river you idiot."
"But why hasn't it come up yet?
"I don't know, it's stuck on a tyre or something. Relax, they'll find the body, we'll get our four-point-o's. Have you ever tried a CAO? Very smooth."
"How can you be so calm about this?"
"I thought, see, I thought you wanted to do this."
"I want...I want to get into Harvard Business."
"This is getting you into Harvard Business."
"Don't you feel the slightest amount of guilt about this?"
"Please. Guilt is for kids."
"Finally, and very quickly, I would like to introduce you to all the lads who are going to do the job with me.
"Arthur, Frank, Rozzer, Coco, Yellow....Camp Freddy you all know....Roger, Dave and Lorna, will be in reserve with three fast cars in case anything goes wrong.
"Right? Now, it's a very difficult job, and the only way to get through it is we all work together, as a team. And that means you do everything I say."
"Feet on the mat, legs apart and face the govenor."
"Name and number to the governor."
"4737 Carlin sir."
"Fighting Carlin. Oh yes, yes. Now then Carlin. You were transferred to me because you assaulted an officer at your previous borstal, though heaven knows what they expect me to do with you. However, I will have no violence in this institution. There is no violence here. Do you understand me?"
"Yes sir."
"Yet no sooner are you settled in than, well, the marks are visible on your face. I'm a generous man Carlin, but I will not have any trainee take liberties. If you are brought here again you will will be in very serious trouble. Do you understand?"
"Yes sir."
"Now, do you have anything to say?"
"Well not really sir, except I wasn't fighting, I fell. Wasn't used to the concrete steps. However I can understand the officer thinking I had by the state of me face. So I've got no excuse really sir. I mean, what else could he think?"
"I've seen some badass bush before, but nothin' like this, man. Little taste 'o home?"
"I hear you bro, this is some shit. Makes Cambodia look like Kansas. Lose your way in here, man, you be in some kinda hurt."
Jump to:
Page One - "We'll just tell your mother that...we ate it all."
Page Two - "He wants to get down there and have sex with those cows."
Page Four - "Run for it, Marty!"
"Yeah, and monkeys might fly out of my butt."