| 808isms |
| from the sometimes brilliant and always hilarious regulators of suite 808 |
| ka: I once paid him [Kyle] to leave me alone. |
| QUOTE OF ALL TIME (according to a very tired kim and KA): "wherever she is, i hope she's drug-free" (RE: Alicia Silverstone) |
| Kim: Nothing is impossible, if you try...you'll be sure to work it out, by and by... if you never say 'quit' and never say 'die'... KA: Is that an 'N Sync song? Kim: No, it's from the Thomas Edison musical we performed in the forth grade. We sang it while doing the can-can. |
| ilana: Hi...just, hold me. |
| ka: Are you okay, Mr. Pitt? |
| kim: Where am I? |
| Zoe: This door is locked. Stephanie: Oh, okay. |
| all: dude, dawg, bro... |
| molly: What's a montgomery cliff? |
| steph: But my bald twat is much more interesting. |
| ka: A small army could march under that door. |
| KA: Masanori speaks better than me. Kim: In english, or italian? |
| ka: We need to laugh, we need to get angry...we need to fall in love! |
| kelly: Hey Molly, how's your dog? |
| molly: Hey, it's all good...we're VIP |
| ilana: i hope you guys hook up with everyone next year...except greg and neil. |
| kelly: You guys have to promise not to tell anyone this but...I hate this thing |
| kim: hi, I'm Ryan...I'm schizophrenic |
| all: You know you're a fatty when... |
| kim: yoshinoya...Eat now, die later |
| zoe: I'm going to have a dance party...in my socks. |
| kim: Beniciodeltoro...that's Spanish for 'he wants my body.' Kelly: No, that has a lot of consonants...it's German. |
| steph: Last night when we were in bed together, I promised you |
| ilana: he says he has all these friends at SAE...they're like "noogies!" |
| zoe: i don't speak Japanese |
| steph: Her nasty chonch was all in my face. |
| zoe: Hold on, I'm naked |
| ka: Yeah, he could go all the way...in your ass! |
| steph: Wanna take a shower together? |
| ka: Oh my god...I'm analyzing analyzing! |
| steph: If it's like there, but it's not there, it's not there...you know. |
| Kelly: Hey bitch ass. Kim: Your mom's a bitch ass. Kelly: Your mom's a bitch ass. Kim: ...your mom...'s a bitch ass. |
| ka: i have a problem |
| steph: i'll wake him up...by licking his balls! |
| steph: He's, like, younger than my brother...it's gross. |
| kim: And then we can go to bed. But not together. Because I'm not Stephanie. And you're not Stephanie either |
| Greg: Marshall! Come look, there are two girls on your bed, and it probably won't last. KA: Yea well, neither does Marshall. |
| Jason: This song is called 'I Miss You.' Stephanie: Yea it is! Jason: No wait, I'm sorry, it's called 'For Shizzle My Nizzle.' Stephanie: Yea it is. |
| ilana: It only arouses me when I'm on my period. |
| kelly: oh i decided our apartmentt next year is gonna be more like friends instead of real world. cuz i'd rather have like the friends theme song u know..."i'll be there for you" as opposed to the real world theme which is like "i'll be there to stab you in the back and sleep with your boyfriend and then talk shit about you. |
| kim: i'm like a little white bernie mac. |
| HONORABLE MENTION: not 808, but funny enough. |
| homeless guy: You're a big, beautiful lady...got any change? |
| chris: hey, use a condom! |
| alberto: When the Brady Bunch went out, did they go just five? No, they went all six. |
| kate: The bathroom bit me, yo |
| Kim: You don't need a fake ID if you go to the ghetto. Kyle: But there's black people there! [kyle is black, by the way] |
| kyle: Keep your eyes on the prize! |
| alberto: Do you want to smell what the rock is cookin'? |
| kadee: gay, gay, gay... |
| adam: Hey, you know those t-shirts that say 'practice safe sex, make love with a trojan'? They should change it to 'practice safe sex, fuck a bruin in the ass.' |
| UV security man: Walk your bike in the mall, please...walk your bike in the mall... |
| fireman: And that's when you realize what you were squeezing was... a.... LAMB!!!... No that's not scary, but it was a whole rack of lambs. Lots of lambs... and if you were allergic to wool. I'm not, but if you were, that would be scary. Because really... a bunch of anything is scarier than one something. I mean like a hundred poodles are scarier than a leopard with no legs. You could walk into your house and there could be a leopard with no legs sitting in your living room and what could it do? It's got no legs. Unless it fell on your head. Like if it were in a tree. Well how could it get there? But if it were in a tree and it falls and just clamps on your head. That would be scary. |
| Keriann: We could even go for a drive around the park. Would you like that? [quoting Reese of MitM] Kadee: Does it include lunch? |
| chris: como estas? ...howdy! |
| greg: biiiiitch! all up in my muthafuckin' shiiiiiiit!!! |
| chris: If she doesn't bring the hat back, I get to shave her head! We pinky swore! |
| kelly: are you drinking, too? chris: where? kelly: i don't know, ricardo says he is drinking. chris: that bitch. he should not be drinking without me. |
| trevor: collecting the recyclables is the first step, not the ONLY step. |
| steph: calculating, always calculating. |
| steph: her hair is, like, 'hi, i'm a brillow pad.' |
| kadee: i'm glad i watch BET, so i could communicate with him. |
| night o' hell special: lots of fun quotes from an all-nighter!!! |
| ka: 1,2,3, oh, i'm over here! i'm over here! |
| steph: i kissed you with tongue. |
| kim: i hope there were no forest animals under there. |
| kim: he must be in the White House fight club. |
| ka: he has three things on, and like, five tags. kim: he's like "could you give me some extra tags...it's stylish" |
| kim: don't ever go in that elevator. it will take you places you don't want to go. ka: what, like butt sex? |
| kim: ilana keeps shaking her ass in my face. ilana: that's what i think of when you talk...ass. |
| marshall: i miss sex...and cheese. kim: yeah, it's a shame we don't have that out here. |
| ilana: now that i've watched a whole season of SatC, and eaten half a pint of ice cream, it's study time. ilana's friend: you sound like you just got divorced. |
| kyle: i'm afraid of being raped by stephanie's mom. she was giving me the eye. kim: no, she was thinking "what is that guy doing with his hair?" |
| kyle: there's a gopher in my arm. wanna see? kim: i think it's a tapeworm. |
| willem dafoe in 'spiderman': where are you? follow that shiver down your spine. kim: he's in his ass? |
| kadee: Well,___ I wasn't going into that jungle, and ____, that coulda gotten stuck between my teeth |
| kim: i actually wanted a pair of cortezes awhile ago, but i forgot until just now. kyle: that's because you don't have a penis. kim: so that's where the memory is stored. |
| ka: i'm gonna look at him and think "you have a small penis" and he's gonna be like "oh god, you know EVERYTHING." |