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Everytime each of them come across each other, not one of them says a word to each other. Not even a simple "hi". Only simple stolen glances at each other when the other is seemingly not aware. That was enough kilig factor to last them the day. A week. A year times three.
The year was 1990 and Rev. Anacleto Guerrero was assigned to the Good Samaritan United Methodist Church after serving in a small house church in Malabon (while also serving as a Professor in the Union Theological Seminary in Dasmariñas, Cavite, where they lived). Of course, like any other Methodist pastor, his assignment is also his family's. It wasn't always a pleasant experience for everyone. But that year, it was Rev. Guerrero's youngest son, Melvin, who was the most upset. He had developed very close friendships in that small house church which was the previous assignment. He was not looking forward to having to make friends all over again.
Nevertheless, that first year in the Good Samaritan United Methodist Church went smoothly. Despite expectations to the contrary, the Guerrero family seemed to be fitting in rather well. In fact, the chairman of the church council regularly invited the family to meals in his home, even during times when council meetings were quite heated. "I may disagree with you, pastor, but what is discussed in here stays in here; you come have lunch with me and my family," or something to that effect was always what Ret. BGen. Roland Pattugalan would always say.
Melvin and Cheremyn were regular soloists
for the Little Ambassadors for Christ
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It was during those gatherings that Melvin (aged 12 at the time) and Cheremyn (aged 13) got to know each other. They were particularly pleased that each of their fathers were professional enough never to take any church council conflicts outside of the church meetings themselves. With such an arrangement, they both were free to develop a unique and quite unusual friendship.
One other way that the couple got to know each other was their membership in the Little Ambassadors for Christ. Patterned after the UP Singing Ambassadors, this children's singing group was a venue for both Melvin and Cheremyn to showcase their talents. They were, in fact, both soloists with the same vocal range. Initially, they both admired each other's talents, but having the same vocal range quickly brought them to some rivalry as to who was, if not the better soloist, the more appropriate soloist for the various musical numbers that was in the LAC repertoire. It did not help that both had rather strong personalities and aspirations to leadership.
The rivalry soon grew heated, even coming to the point that they would not even speak with each other. Yet, being in constant contact also in another venue, in Sunday School, turned what they had into a strange "love-hate" relationship, because as they seemed to dislike the other, they also felt the kilig of chemistry whenever they crossed paths.
There were instances when Melvin would irrately complain about Cheremyn's antics when she and then close friend Myla Sembrano was around. She would giggle and point and make murmured comments just out of Melvin's hearing but well within his awareness; she would even tease him to other girls. Melvin's mother, however, suspected that Cheremyn only did the "pest" act so that she can look at Melvin without feeling embarrassed.
It is the common stereotype that men are egotistic and active while women are more humble and passive. And at this point in time, the stereotype seemed to be true, as finally in this battle of wills it was Cheremyn who waved the white flag and admitted her feelings in a letter. This flabbergasted Melvin, of course. This written declaration of love and admiration was coming from a girl who, just a year or two before, had been taller and bigger than him, and mean to him to boot. For one memorable instant, Melvin suddenly saw Cheremyn as a blushing, shy and very lovelorn girl. Of course, Melvin wrote back.
The sending of letters continued for the next four years, during that period of being assigned to GSUMC. The exchange of letters was the primary way of communication between the two of them during this period; they had established their friendship, they both admitted that they admired each other, but, ironically, this also made them more awkward in each other's presence. Melvin would later remember those times, comparing how the youth of "Generation X" of the late 20th Century and the early years of the 21st are more uninhibited in their shows of affection—a normal MU relationship nowadays, he observes, already involve a lot of holding of hands and going out alone. During the period of MU between Melvin and Cheremyn, however, there was no such thing, choosing instead to pour their hearts out in their letters. Nevertheless, there were times when they did hold hands during extended periods of time, that is, during the prayer meetings they both attended. Imagine, then, the thrill they felt, and kept on feeling even hours afterward, as their hands touched
When the Guerrero family moved away to be assigned to another church, the exchange of letters became impractical—they had not been sending letters to each other by post, using more "traditional" methods, which is now inconvenient and infrequent, yet nonetheless continued. Not to be daunted, the two resorted to another, more immediate form of communication: the telephone.
Seven more years passed. They were still exchanging letters and engaging in phonecalls, yet they both remember still being in MU mode—there was still a lot of awkwardness as they met each other during district gatherings and youth camps. Eventually, stolen glances from across the room became not only not enough, they became unbearable. Melvin decided to act.
It was the evening of December 31st, 1995 when Melvin decided to go before his parents and petition for his right to take a girlfriend. He was not yet even eighteen. He very anxious, because this move would prove to be a first for a number of reasons. This was the first time he will take a girlfriend; he will also be the first among his sibling to do so. That was the enormity of the phenomenon. All this went through his head as he went before Mom and Dad with great trepidation.
The reaction of the parents was astounding-they were all for it (to Melvin's eternal delight). They didn't just give him the "go" signal, but also their blessing and no small amount of suggestions on how to go about it. But Melvin had other things planned.
It was a long time before Melvin could find sleep later that night. He was not going to waste any more time; it will be the next day and he had to make some preparations. Melvin will always remember his state of mind-"Being filled with the idealism of forever and the love of God... [taking the] plunge into the whirlpool of flowers, rainbows and butterflies.... simply [described] as bliss." [Ang lupit!]
The next day, New Year's Day, Cheremyn beheld Melvin gallantly dressed up, his hair neatly and smartly combed, wearing a batik polo shirt recently pressed and black pants with creases pressed to razor sharpness. My, what an image! This was the man that bravely went before Cheremyn, perhaps even going on bended knee, for the first time declaring his undying love with his own voice for the first time. She fairly trembled as Melvin enunciated each carefully chosen word, proposing to Cheremyn, telling her of his motives. She can hardly keep her gaze directed at him, even he, whom she had stolen uncounted glances to, he whose eyes she had longed to gaze in to.
Yet, there were two voices in Cheremyn's head at that time. One voice was cautious, prudent. New Year's Day as their anniversary? [Why not?] Who ever heard of such a thing? [This can be the first time] Better think it over, say, for about a week. [What for?] There are a lot of very valid reasons before one should give oneself up; before one says "Yes". [Like what?]
The other voice, however, was more insistent, and was beginning to make more sense. But, obstinately, the other voice held on to the only fact known for sure, an overwhelming desire not to celebrate an Anniversary on January the 1st; the fact that there will be an anniversary has been taken for granted, that she will say "Yes" a dead certainty. Just not, oh, so soon. And yet, as Melvin rhapsodized about them growing together physically, emotionally and spiritually from this point onward, even as her more cautious side was still talking, she was already saying "Yes, yes. Oh, yes, my love," overpowered by a spontaneous overflow of such powerful feelings. She loved him, she really did. She had loved him, and only him, for the last eleven years. She had been loved by him, she only, for the same amount of years. They each could have found other people within the last seven years; but they didn't. They each didn't have to be faithful to each other, being bound by no bond, not being official, yet faithful they remained. True love, certainly; God's grace, most definitely. Cheremyn conciously knew at that time, as Melvin bared his heart, that they were truly in-love with each other. "So what's wrongwith it being now?" she demanded of her now diminishing cautious self.
"And it came to pass that before the first lunch of the first day of the year, a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship commenced..." Melvin was sixteen, Cheremyn seventeen; and they have been inseparable ever since. Best friends still, yet now also more than friends, now allowing themselves to express vocally to each other what they felt, they passed the next eight years. Friends and family who stood witness would say that all through the years, their feelings for each other have not changed, but they are only partially correct. For their feelings for each other, slowly but surely, have changed-their love has grown deeper over the years.
At the very end, history (as the cliché went) repeated itself. For in very much the same circumstances that Melvin went through eight years ago did he once again go up to his parents, asking for their permission for another undertaking. Once again, the status quo was not enough. Once again, they felt the need for transition to another stage in their relationship. Now, they want to marry each other; and Melvin went before his parents, as he did years ago, to ask for their blessing.
For they had gotten tired of having to say "good-bye," "goodnight," and "see you tomorrow" after spending the greater part of the day together. Clearly, 75%-90% of the time was no longer enough.
And they were already displaying signs of wanting to become a unit, needing to become a unit. There had only been they, no one else. They still belonged to separate households, yet longed to have a household of their own.
And God seemed to be showing them that the time was right as well, for various circumstances and signs were being presented to them about marriage that was either incredible coincidence, or divine providence.
Though Melvin's parents behaved in typical fashion, not only giving their blessing but also their support as well, Melvin had also exeperienced the same feelings of anxiety that he felt before. He didn't have to be, as the timing was, if not perfect, very close to it.
For Cheremyn had just finished her undergraduate degree in Denistry, as well as passing the board exams. Melvin had also graduated and had worked at the right jobs to assure that they could afford to get married. And Melvin no longer had to fear about Cheremyn's "answer" for both have been discussing and dreaming about getting married.
But probably the one unknown factor was the reaction of Cheremyn's parents. Years before, when he won the right to become her boyfriend, it was a decision made only by Cheremyn; now, he also had to get the permission and blessing of those who will become his in-laws. Now, the General (as Cheremyn's Dad was more commonly known) was a very careful, deliberate man, always making it a point to do things right. Giving his daughter's away was not new to him; in fact, if Cheremyn would wed, she would be the last of his children to get married. He has also known Melvin for quite some time, as Melvin had been a semi-permanent fixture at their home.
But a careful, deliberate and well-meaning man he still is, and he needed to know, at least for the record, if Melvin can take care of his Cheremyn.
And so one morning the General, after his routine morning walk with his wife, met with Melvin in a swanky restaurant where he began an "interview" which Melvin would always remember afterward as much more difficult than any exam, written, oral or practical, any Math test, even the the UPCAT. Melvin had been anxious, he hadn't had any sleep, and he barely had an appetite that day, for the stakes of that meeting were no doubt higher than any quiz, test or exam he had ever faced, for he had to convince them that he was worthy of their daughter's, nay, princess' hand in marriage.
God was good, for so were Cheremyn's parents. They seemed to have been satisfied with the way Melvin carried himself that day, and after giving the couple their blessing, went and carried on with the rest of their day. Melvin had been as stiff as a board the whole time and it took him a while before he could relax sufficiently much later. Now, we was dumbfounded—it is over, and the blessing has been given. Doubtless, his head began to spin with plans upon plans, plotting to get the next stage set, meditating on what next to do.
Yet something else brought him back to the here and now, back to what was important. Back to the reason behind everything (and so to being finally relaxed and able to enjoy himself).
Cheremyn had flashed him the sweetest, happiest smile she had ever given him. And that was all it took.
(not THE END. . .)
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