Fan Fiction
TITLE: Santa Claus, Favorite Uncle, Guardian, Most Trusted Friend
AUTHOR: Kate
RATING: PG
CODES: T, C
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Archiving - Just let me know if you want the story!
DISCLAIMER: I don�t own anything. I am making no profit from this story.
SUMMARY: My response to the question, Why wasn�t Chakotay picked as Miral�s godfather?
�Chakotay!� B�Elanna called, as the red and black back of the commander moved around a corner. �Chakotay, wait. I need to talk to you.� She chased him a few feet.
Chakotay stopped. Of course he did. He was a gentle man, a polite man. He would not deliberately hurt his dearest friend, even if she had deliberately hurt him. He turned. �Lt. Torres?� He said, in a chilled tone he had learned years ago and perfected by years of watching Kathryn. Well, he wasn�t being kind, but he wasn�t being cruel.
�Chakotay, I know that by now you�ve heard that Tom and I asked the doctor to be our baby�s godfather.� She hesitated, waiting for acknowledgment. It was moments like this that B�Elanna desperately wished she had some of Tom�s gift for words.
His face was like a stonewall.
�And if you didn�t know before, I told you. But you have to let me tell you why.� The words left her in a rush.
His posture and stance did not change, but she sensed a slight change in the tension between them. Now, he wasn�t emitting hostile vibes, just curious and cautious.
�Can we go to the mess hall or the holodeck or my quarters?� She pleaded. �I don�t want the whole ship hearing what I have to say.�
His shields slammed up so quickly she could feel it.
�Okay, so here is fine.� She stumbled over her words. �Chakotay, I asked the doctor because -- lots of reasons -- I know gossip has plenty to say about that too.� She set her shoulders in a more defensive posture. �I did something stupid that almost hurt my baby. I did hurt the doctor. I breached his trust. He�s my doctor, I�m his, and we have to trust each other. I had to make it better. So he�s going to be Miral�s godfather. But what does a godfather really do? Bring presents and show up for holidays and a few scattered religious events -- Tom and I don�t practice, so the doctor�s out confirmation and communion and whatever else. He�s first line babysitter -- except he�ll always be on call and we promised Harry that we�ll call him first.� B�Elanna took a breath. �Not that a godfather isn�t important.� She said hastily. �But there�s another role that I need to ask you to play in my child�s life Chakotay.�
�B�Elanna.� He sighed. �You don�t have to make up�,�
�Let me talk.� She growled, and Chakotay�s jaw closed. �It�s from Klingon culture -- I know, I know. I�m not a practicing Klingon. But Tom and I aren�t practicing Catholics or Orthodox Christians and the kid has a godfather.� He jaw jutted. �Now will you come with me so I can find something to eat before I cry or wind up back in sickbay because I fainted?�
In an instant, Chakotay�s face changed. �How long did you work this shift?� He demanded.
�Nine hours.� She said defensively, though it was closer to ten. �But I took a lunch.�
�I know your definition of lunch.� He said. �Ten minutes with a ration bar doesn�t cut it. You�re pregnant, B�Elanna. You have to start taking care of yourself. If you can�t do it, I�ll assign it to Paris as special duty, and if that�s not enough I�ll tail you myself.�
Relief broke on her face. �Try it, commander. Just try it.�
They walked together to the Paris quarters. There was a note on the table in Tom�s scrawled handwriting that said he and Harry were shooting pool at Sandrine�ssince they hadn�t done that in a few years. B�Elanna cleared padds off the table, and punched something into the replicator.
�What is that?� Chakotay regarded the plate she set in front of him warily.
�Relax.� She smiled guardedly. �This is an appetizer. The replicator�s working on your favorite soup and sandwiches for the main course.�
�Not�,�
�No, not that.� She said hastily. �I know that you haven�t been able to eat that kind of soup since Seska and the others stole a bowl of it. No, this is a kind of gazpacho and BLTs.�
Chakotay smirked. �Paris introduce you to that?�
�Max.� B�Elanna shook her head. �BLT was his favorite lunch.�
Chakotay touched her hand. He didn�t say anything, but he realized that he still remembered Kathryn�s favorites from New Earth. Maybe it was the same, he thought. Maybe you never forget those things you notice and love about an old not-quite-lover.
The moment passed. �But I do know how you love gazpacho. The sour cream�s to the side so you can add it or choose not to.�
The sat across from each other at the little round table with the appetizer plate between them. Chakotay allowed the coziness of the moment to surround him. He savored the moment for what it was, storing it for later. They ate the food she called a quesadilla. She tried to convince him that it was okay for her to eat so much cheese, and he tried to pretend he believed her. When they were comfortable again, talking in the rhythms of the old days, with soup bowls half empty, she began to talk again.
�Chakotay, the reason I didn�t choose you for my baby�s godfather is because I want you to fill a far more important role for her. I want you to be her�,� B�Elanna paused. �Damn it, I lost the English word that translates it. I think the closest would be an amalgam of Santa Claus, grandpa, favorite uncle, bodyguard, and most trusted friend.�
Chakotay�s eyes bored into hers. �I meant it B�Elanna. You don�t have to invent a role for me.�
�This is no invention.� B�Elanna said fiercely. �It�s a Klingon tradition. When a child is born, the oldest or the wisest or the strongest or the proudest or the most respected member of the clan is asked to guard and guide the child. In the old days it started because so many young fathers didn�t come back from battle and because if you were old, you were strong or smart or brave enough to have lived through your youth, so it was a good shot there was something you could teach a kid. When things got a little less intense, it was a way to mark who was most honored and who was most dear to a family. Fathers asked their best friends or their brothers. But after you ask and accept, it�s a lifetime bond.�
B�Elanna paused to let that sink in. �In Klingon homes, the guardian selects the school where the warrior will train. He teaches the young one the rules of conduct, and the history of the people and the meaning of honor. After mother and father, a child�s third word is usually the guardian�s name.�
She continued, �All through childhood, the young one sees her guardian as a magic force almost. She listens to his stories and when she�s in trouble and needs her behind swatted she cries for him. She saves a seat for him at every table she has, from the time she sits with the adults to the time one of them dies. It is a lifetime bond, and distance is no excuse for not honoring it.�
She let that sink in, but stopped his reply. �I�m not done. In our case, you would be her ally. When Tom and I drive her nuts, she�ll run to you. Let her. When she�s a child, she�ll run to your lap first. She�ll show you her programs on the holodeck and her pictures. When she�s a teenager and she and I are about to rip each other apart she�ll come crying to you. You�ll comfort her and sort her out and send her home, and then you�ll comfort me and sort me out and help us reconcile.�
She leaned forward. �The benefits are hard to measure. You�ll be an integral part of our family. We�ll expect to see you every holiday, and at least one meal a week besides. Even if we get home to earth, you�re obligated to call frequently. And if you get married and have children, they become part of my family too. My child will not be of your flesh, but in so many ways she will belong to you, too.�
B�Elanna took a breath. �So you see, I need you for this job, Chakotay. There�s no one else I would invite to be a part of my family. Not this way.�
She allowed her intense eyes to meet his. �There�s no one else I love enough to ask to guard my child, love her, and be part of her life forever.� She said. �Because it is forever. When she has children and grandchildren, she will tell them stories about you. You will be immortalized. But you have to risk it all with us. Once you agree, there is not backing out. It is for life. It seals you to me and to her in a bond that Klingons take as seriously as brotherhood.�
She wet her lips. �Do you understand everything I�m asking of you? I know it�s too much, but there�s no one else I trust the way I trust you.�
Chakotay took her hand and gripped it fiercely. �Why didn�t you say so from the start?� He asked.
She coughed, and laughed. �Say the words.�
�I will be proud to be your child�s -- what is the word?� He asked.
�Santa Claus, grandfather, favorite uncle, guardian, most trusted friend�all of it and more.�
�You never could just ask for something small, could you?� He teased. �I am proud to do this for you.� The words were so pale, so inert next to the feeling that filled his chest and throat and made his eyes burn.
She looked at their linked hands, and squeezed. The gesture that wasn�t enough met the words that weren�t enough and filled the room. They let the silence permeate, and realized that they knew each other better than words could touch, better than minds could logically calculate. And the two actions that weren�t enough and the silence that surrounded them added together to cement in understanding the bond that had always been between them.
