I hope that Becks Bytes reaches you all in good health. It seems an age ago when we were hiking up the Grand Canyon (don't mean to be rude but quite frankly, thank God absolute nightmare that was and I have to say, one of my more grumpy moments with Trek!) or swimming with the dolphins in Florida, kissing Mickey's luscious lips (eh Kumiko?!), rocking through San Fran on the trams, larging it in Banff, oh and of course saying our sad and very emotional farewells in the city of New York. An age ago, I tell you. Still, thanks to Neil and his hard work, and of course due to our mammoth of photos, these memories, I hope, remain fondly in our hearts (voices, voices, hearts and hearts and voices too - that one's for the fellow Dirty Dancing fans out there, mainly you Nina, Tony, don't even try to get the joke!). Anyway, it has certainly left us with a few tales to tell the grandchild that's for sure. It has to be said that we were loving it so we were, loving it!!!

And now, as if things weren't Patrick Swayze enough, (for the non-British out there that's cockney rhyming slang for crazy, it also fits with the Dirty Dancing theme which I thought was quite clever) Neil now tells me that he would like me (I mean ME of all people) to add a little something to his website with some words of wisdom and advice. This truly is something quite Patrick Swayze and very possibly a foolish error on his part but, how can I refuse my little Neil so here goes, are you all sitting comfortably?

This month, I would like to outline a few tips for anyone who might be thinking of doing a Trek America trip, just some tips that I have learnt along the way. I hope you find them useful...

1) Probably the most important of all, particularly for those who are considering a trip to Utah or something like that... when you do go to the toilet in the desert, make sure that you are not standing in front of a cactus when you do so because, if you are and you do happen to loose your balance in the process, the results, as myself and the rest of my fellow bacon munchers can vouch for, are not pleasant. If you could just bear that one in mind.
2) Speaking of bears, if you are staying in for example Yosemite National Park or somewhere similar, you will be warned about not keeping food and smelly products in your tents. Please remember that this includes chewing gum and also lip balm, also apples are a bit of a liability as well.
3) Very important, do not sleep in a tent which is titled tent 'No. 6', I don't really want to go in to details here, as, to be honest I can't actually remember but, just take my word for it, this tent was not dubbed the sick tent for no reason.
4) Tell everyone in your group that you have knee problems, that way you get the best seat in the WAN the whole time, if you need the specifics about the problem just ask Nina, she is quite knowledgeable on this.
5) If you do not like cooking, offer to be the food shopper. Nina is again an expert on this (that girl's talents are never ending!), Jenny is also pretty skilled here (I'm not one to gossip but it must be something to do with the Wheeler heritage).
6) Try to be as organised as possible in the mornings. It really is very important that you are tidy, prompt and diligent at all times.
7) Trips can sometimes be long and tiresome; The Sound of Music soundtrack helps to pass time. This should not really need mentioning, but the Dirty Dancing CD is also a must have.
8) Whilst on the subject of long journeys, it is important that you keep your fluid levels up at all times. However, if you do happen to be addicted to Starbucks coffee, you should be aware that you will be required to hold your bladder for long periods on certain occasions.
9) Make sure that you keep a close eye on your sunglasses, in my experience, they tend to have a mind of their own.
10) Last but most certainly not least, if you do go skydiving in Las Vegas, ask for Derek as your instructor, he's lovely! [see left]

These are my top 10 tips to any trekkers. Quite frankly, I think if you can follow these, then you too will be loving it, just as us bacon munchers once were.

Pause here for a moment's contemplation as a wave of nostalgia falls over us all.

Hope these tips are ok for the time being. Next month I will be looking at the everyday aspect of life and exploring what sort of advice I can offer you all here. So, be sure that you regularly check the website, you would after all, not want to miss out. In the meantime, keep well, take care and remember, if in doubt, laugh. In the words of Ali G and the Queen Mother (may she rest in peace) "Respect!"

Keep it real. Bacon all the way.
Until next month, Adieu.
Lots of love...

That was Rebecca Lowson, reporting for Becks Bytes
on the Bacon Trekkers website

BECKS BYTES ARCHIVE
Latest edition - January 2003
Second edition - June 2002