| Section 2 - The Need to Please! |
| If your drive is to please: Your values are those of conciliation, kindness and service. You are spending time with other people and are comfortable in social situations. You are usually skilled in dealing with others and you like to look after other people. You are as pleasant as possible to everyone, extremely law-abiding and helpful. You are concerned with doing the right thing. Your statements are often turned into questions e.g. �Is that OK with you?�. Your stress is caused by being ignored or by being criticised. Your fear is that you will be rejected by being found �blameworthy�. Your stress behaviour is that you have a tendency to become more and more emotional. Your language becomes peppered with clich�s and if the stress increases you increasingly find it difficult to say �No� to anyone. You have an urge to rescue anyone and everyone. The drivers you picked up are those of 'Don't be assertive', What you want is not important', 'Don't say "No"'. Your ways of reducing stress in yourself are: � Stop being so nice unless you really mean it � Say what is in your mind and ask for what you want � Take responsibility for your own actions and avoid taking responsibility for others � Listen carefully to others and respond to what they are actually saying rather than to believe what want � Develop a sense of your own autonomy and value in spite of what others may think or say � Be aware of how you deal with conflict and stop trying to avoid it |
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| COUNTERACTING DRIVERS |