If I thought for a moment
that my name could ever
pass through your lips,
roll off your tongue,
the way hers does,
like sweet honey to the ears,
then I'd give every breath
and every inch of my body
to show you what I feel for you.

But the way you look at me
will never compare
to that gaze you save for her.
I see the way you stare
past me
through me
searching for her face in the crowd.
Finding her,
your eyes linger, intimate, and long.
And I know
there are no words I can breathe
to make you change your mind.

You're consumed by the perfection
that is her every move.
You watch her
high atop the pedastal
you've built for her.
Blinded by her radiance,
you see no one else -
or is it just the sun in your eyes?

So many times I've wished,
wished she would fall,
the way I'd fall for you.
So you'd notice me
and catch me
but I doubt you'll even notice when I do.

A Father's Love

every night
I prayed
for the yelling
and fighting
to stop
but it never did

my father
the alcoholic
loved drinking
above all else
even more
than his wife and kids

a barrage of cruel words
angry and hurtful
poured forth
from my father's
intoxicated mouth
tearing me down

he never hit us
he didn't have to
words alone
were painful enough

slurred words
and blurred vision
dad watched life
pass him by
through the bottom of a bottle

harsh curses
belittling us
demeaning us
a drunken rage
good times were few
loving words scarce

late one night
I left
our "family"
emotionally destroyed
seeking refuge
from the storm
that was our home