Squeeing Piecatchers

One day Al had taken MT to the park because the pad was mad at always being the center of everything and kicked everyone out.
"What a tetchy pad.." said Mike.
"Shhhhh.. or we'll be evicted!" said Peter.
So they all went to the park and Al took MT to the swings and the stuff and they were tralalaing around. MT was naming things as usual.
"There's a flower!" he said, pointing at a beach ball.
"There's a pinnniacle thingy!" he said, pointing at a flower.
"There's a bird!" he said, pointing at BT.
"I am a bird!" said BT and giggled.
"Yes you are birdy thing," said MT and jumped on her. "FLY FLY ME AWAY!"
"OOG I AM NOT A BIRD!" said BT and was squooshed.
"There's a Mike," he said pointing at Al and stepped neatly off BT.
"There's a Davy," he said, pointing at BT.
"Oh good I'm not a bird anymore," she said and promptly went to sleep.
"There's a.... MOMMMY!" said MT and ran around and ran around.
"WHAT!?" said Al and looked up from her park bench where she was reading and fending off Davy who was trying to make her picnic with him.
"Moommmmyy there's a thing!" he said pointing at Sassip.
"Yes dear, you know Sassip," said Al boredly and whacked Davy lighting on the nose as he was trying to shove whippedcreamed poundcake into her mouth and only succeeded in getting whipped cream up her nose.
"Ey, what's Sassip doin' here?" asked Davy.
"Duh man, the pad kicked everyone out, remember?" said Mike.
"Oh yeh!" said Davy and crammed the poundcake in his own mouth happily.

"Hey when's the plot gonna arrive?" asked Peter worriedly.
"Here I am!" said the plot.
"Oh good. Please get on with it," said Peter.
"Where's my dressing room?"
"It's in the pad but the pad evicted us,"
"Well then I'm not staying!" and the plot huffed off. Peter looked like he was about to cry. Just then a vagrant plot walked by and Micky grabbed it and shoved it in its place just to make Peter happy.
"Don't cry Pete I got us a plot," he said and wandered off in search of pie.
Just then his pants turned bright flashy neon red.

"MOOOOMMMMY!" he shouted for no reason at all.
Al jumped up and looked around frantically. "MT!? Where where? Where's my Baby!?" and she ran over to Micky and looked at him.
"Hey you aren't MT...." she said suspiciously. "Why are you impersonating him?"
"I wasn't," said Micky.
"Yes you were! You said Mommy!"
"I was calling for *MY* Mommy!" said Micky and pushed Al into the mud.
"That was mean," sniffed Al and took a mud bath because it was supposed to be rejuvenating.

Meanwhile the real MT was down by the pond trying to catch the ducks.
"Mommy there are piecatchers!" he said, pointing disturbedly at the ducks who were far out in the pond.
"Yes MT you can't get them because they are way out on the water!" said Al and watched him fondly.
Just then MT stared out at the water and looked longingly at the ducks.
He then walked out to the ducks, who, it should be noted, did not have any water in which to float with. They were so stunned MT caught 8 of them before they got wise.
"BT!?" asked Al jumping up.
"What?" asked BT tetchily from her nappy nap on the nice hard ground where MT trampled her.
"Why did you drain the pond!?"
"I didn't," said BT and went back to sleep.
"Huh..." said Al, called MT back in, made him release the ducks and filled the pond back up trying to be as discreet as possible.
"MOMMY I WANTED TO KEEP THE PIECATCHERS!" shouted MT and threw a kiddie fit. Then he stopped and suddenly had about three ducks in a big cage. MT was all smiles.
"Oh uh.. who did that!?" asked Al to no one in particular.
"MEEE MOOMMMYYY!" shouted MT and grinned stupidly.
"Uh... oh.. er... MIIIIIKKKKKKEEEEE!!!" shouted Al and grabbed the piecatch..er.. ducks away from MT and let them go.
"WHAAAATTTT???" said Mike in a perturbed voice, coming over & dancing around Al in a circle.
"Stop that," said Al in fear.
"Oh, sorry," Mike mumbled and stood still.
"Mike scared Mommyyyyy?????????????" MT shrilled.
"Uh, wait a sec, Miss Know-it-all Author Chick Thing, shrill is NOT a verb," said Micky in a pretrubed voice.
"Um pretrubed isn't a word either 'cause up there you said perturbed and-" Davy started until the author made him eat raw mud.
"Better than cooked mud," said Peter.
The author (who really does know it all) sent Micky to help Davy eat raw mud until it was all gone.

"HEY that was my bath mud!" Al sniffed & proceeded to open a 24-7 health spa until a policeman came and asked her questions about building permits and she had to close it.
"At least the story is in a building now," said BT helpfully.
"No, we gotta tear it down, the foopy p'licemen said," said Davy.
"OH HE SAID FOOPY!" said BT & beat Davy on the shins until the big wrecking ball came & smooshed her.
"Ha," said Micky.
"Ha ha," said Mike.
"Ah ha," said Micky.
"A ha hahahaha," said Mike.
"Apathetic laughter," Peter announced jovially.
"Hey!!! Author!!! You made me eat mud and now I LAUGH apathetically?! Look, *I* was the one who took time to go and hunt up a vagrant plot & stick it in the story, I sure think I better get some kinda-" Micky started until the author turned him into raw mud.
"Oh Ickyyyyyyyyyyy Micky," said MT & suddenly the mud was Micky again.
"Yuck... hey, if ducks are piecatchers... and I want pie..." said Micky & left on some frightening escapade.
"Well, I'll just be rollin m'self off to a chicken fry," Mike said, but MT stopped him.
"No no no, waiiiitttt Mike hat chicken thing, did you scare my MOOOOMMMYYYYYYY??" MT said perturbedly.
"Yes yes he did," said Al & sulked.
"OOH!! You're a BAD MAN!" MT said firmly in horror, and Mike rolled off to a cornfield.
Al, BT, Sassip, Peter, Davy, and Micky (who had returned with pie on his face & feathers in his hair) stared in unabashed shock.

"Boy am I unabashed or what?" said Sassip benevolently.
"Mike.... Mike... where did.... MT?" Davy said.
"Mike? What about Mike?" said Peter. "I thought we were horroring at MICKY."
"HORRORING??!! NOOOOOO!" Sassip yelled & punted Pita into the now-empty pond.
"Sassip!! You punted nice Pita thing!!" MT shrieked & Sassip bounced off to the cornfield.
"But... but... the pond was full a minute ago..." said Pita.
"Oh well the author is being inconsistent," Micky said.
"STOP RAGGIN' ON ME!!" screamed the author and made Micky roll off to the cornfield too.
"It's a GOOD thing that Micky and Sassip and Mike are all in the cornfield, MT!" Al said reassuringly.
"Yes, yes, it's a GOOD thing!" said BT.
"I want some pops!!!" MT scowled.
"No honey cookie they're bad for your teeth," Al said in a bored tone.
"OOH!!!" said MT & Al rolled off to the cornfield.
"Uh..." said BT & stared at Peter who stared at MT who stared at BT.
"Hey!! You were crummy moooommmmyyy! I don't like you," MT pouted & BT poofed into the cornfield.
"Uh... oh, gosh MT I like you! I would give you pops if I had any!" said Peter. "It's a GOOD thing you put them all in the cornfield! It's a very good thing!"


"Umm... hold on, we're having technical difficulties," said one author to the other author who was glaring at her for making this story into a Twilight Zone rip-off.
"See?? Stupid know-it-all HAS to sneak in her pop culture references, doesn't she, Ooh yes, well, you snit-flouncer, I can tell you..." Micky started until the author threatened him with raw muddy sleefish and he shut up. Then the author politely surrendered the authorship to the other author.
Suddenly Sassip bounded in. "SLEEEEEFISH!? WHERE I WANT!" she said and ran around. Everyone shrugged and jumped aboard and she bounded back to the pond. Mike had salvaged a few bushels of fresh corn to take back with him to the next fry since it was his turn to bring corn.

Meanwhile, MT was sitting on a huge pile of lemonade pop wrappers and had about 5 in his hands at once.
"Mmmmmmmmmmmm mmm mmm," he said happily.
Everyone disembarked Sassip and stared at him.
"What.... Where did he get all those pops?!" asked Al.
"He poofed them up..." said Peter quietly.
"But HOW how how oh oh oh...." said Al and paced around.
"HA he's funny," said BT and sat back on her ground bed.
"No no time for pad pad house thingy!" said Sassip and shoved everyone into her pouch and bounced on home to the pad.
She let them all out when they got there and went off to scour for sleefish.
"You don't think anyone saw Sassip in the park do you?" asked Davy worriedly.
"Man EVERYONE saw Sassip. Did you hear them? 'Oh wow look at that huge ugly monster?' and then she punted them. 'Oh hey what's that big green thing?' and then she punted them..." said Mike.
"Oooh.. um.. I hope they don't come looking for Sassip." said Davy.
"I think that you need some stuff." said MT and shoved breffast serals all down their throats without going near them.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" shouted everyone but it sounded more like "Guguguggggggggguuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhh!".
Sassip bounded back in, saw the horror, and being too much for her fled out to the sea to hide.

"Sassip Saaaaasssipppp!" said Davy floundering around on the floor.
"DAVY IS A FLOUNDER? HE IS YUMMY!" said Sassip and tried to eat him but was disappointed as he didn't have that yummy cream filling flounders always do.
"HEY!? Where's the cream filling!?" she asked irately.
"SASSIP I AM NOT A FLOUNDER!" Davy was heard to shriek from her stomach.
"OH! The CARNAGE!" shrieked BT in horror, as she had finally got the brains to poof up a thing so MT couldn't choke her on breffast serals. (Normally Al would have figured this out first but her mind is addled with the fact that MT is her little baby and is being cruel. MWA HA. Er.)
"OOHHH FOOP!" yelled Sassip and punted BT to Jamaica where she had a lovely time and brought back a souvenir tambourine for Davy.
"DAY-VEEEE I got you a tamarin!!" she screeched.
"A WHAT?!" yelled Davy from Sassip's stomach.
"A tambourine," said BT in flustered embarrassment, & slapped Peter on the cheek a bit.
"Wake up!! You need less breffast serals," she said & poofed up a giant stomach pump & saved everyone except Al, who would just have to figure it out on her own time.
"Hey, you should fix Al," said Davy from BT's stomach pump.
"Ugh get outta there you're cloggin up the works," said BT & sent Davy to take a shower as he was all stomach acid-y.

Meanwhile Al had woken up & put MT in a playpen forcefield thing and he was whinging about piecatchers.
"Well apparently his powers aren't all that strong... but why does he have em?" she mused.
"Don't look at me, YOU'RE his mother," said BT jealously.
"OOH, lookie at miss SNIT-flouncer, she's JEALOUS is she?" said Micky meanly.
"UGH what is it with you in this story?!" screeched BT & asked Sassip to punt him to kingdom come but she was busy ordering Flounder Kreme Kakes from Nastyhake up in Philly.
"BT?" said Peter, whispering apologetically. "Micky is suffering from chicken fry withdrawal, but he won't admit to his own problems, and just keeps going to the turkey fries and-"
"I HEAR THAT PETER!!" Micky shouted & ran around frantically in circles until BT dropped a sixteen-ton weight on him and he shut up for almost a whole paragraph.
"The Micky things are just being troublesome today," said Davy acidly. "OH, bad pun, acidly, yuck."
"Hey, what's this I hear about chicken fry withdrawal?" said Mike. Peter explained Micky's problem & Mike decided to open a Meat Fry Party rehab center but he couldn't get a building permit.

"I think MT is unamused with his playpen," said BT.
"Oh no, it has a minifridge full of lemmyade pops," Al remarked absently.
"Yeh, but he finished it," said Davy.
MT was kicking the forcefield and whinging horribly.
"OH HE'S A MONSTER!" shouted Al.
"NOO MOMMY!" said MT and turned Al into a monster.
"Ugh." said Al and tried to turn back but it didn't work.
"Hehe Mommmmy I tricked you!" said MT and jumped around.
"What!?" said Al and was about to start to cry when MT felt bad and turned her back.
"THAT was weird!" said BT idly chewing on some sugar cane.
"Ugh what's wrong with him?" asked Al quietly to herself.
MT poofed out of the forcefield.
"No no no he's not supposed to be able to do that!" said Al.
"Mmmm I know what it is." said Micky.
"You do not!" said Al and looked angrily at him.
"Yes yes I do. You know how I can read your mind and control you sometimes?" said Micky.
"Yeeessss?" asked Al suspisciously.
"Well I bet MT can do that too only tap into your powers without having to take control of you first." said Micky and wandered away.
"OMIGOSH HE'S A GENIUS!" said Al and fell over from the great brunt force of the thought.
Everyone was awe. Even Sassip who didn't have the motive to punt was awe.
Not motive. I forget. Something.

Anwyay, Al was staring at Micky. "How did you figure that out?"
"Well I decided to see what you were thinking and I found MT in there fooping around with things." said Micky and ducked three pairs of shoes that went whizzing past his head.
"BT, stop throwing shoes at Micky, dear," said Al, and stared at her oddly. BT blushed and ran off mumbling something about socks and squishy things.
Meanwhile, Al was trying to figure out how to keep MT out of her mind.
"MT, honey, how did you get into my mind?" asked Al.
"I always can Mommy thing!" announced MT happily. "I can make things now!"
"No MT that's bad..." said Al.
"But I wanna be a figment toooo!" said MT and thrashed about crankily.
"Well you're a real boy though, MT!" said Al.
"Nooo I wanna be a thingy toooo!" said MT and poofed up a cageful of piecatchers to poke at with crackers.

"Don't call me dear," said BT.
"Gee that was just a *LITTLE* late..." said Peter.
"Huh?" said BT and went to get her shoes.
"What do you need THREE pairs of shoes for?" asked Davy.
"One for my feet, one for my hands and one for my tush," said BT.
"TUSH!?" said Mike who had rolled off to a chicken fry but had returned.
"I didn't say tush!" said BT huffily and wandered off in search of Micky cause she knew he wandered off somewhere.
"I'm right here, but shhhhh," said Micky popping out of one of the cabinets.
"Man we really should get some food for them. They are getting infested by drummers," said Mike in all his stoic deadpan glory.
"What?!" said Peter & opened the cabinet. "OUT," he said firmly.
Micky got out, followed by Ringo Starr, Keith Moon, Mike Clarke, and a bunch of other drummers.
"WHAT THE HECK?!" screeched everybody.
"Uh, sorry, this year's convention was in the cabinets," Micky said apologetically.
"Umm...okay..." said Mike slowly.
"Mike... why don't..." Davy trailed off.
"Yeh... I think so," said Mike nodding, never taking his eyes off Micky, & rolling off with Davy.
"Whaaaaat?!" said Micky as if everyone's cabinets were infested with drummers.
"OHMIGOSH I *FOUND* HIM!!! Hi Micky I forgot I didn't tell you how much I LOOOVE you this whole story so I will say it now... ahem... this will take about five hours," said BT, stepping up on a soapbox & squishing it because soapboxes are tiny.
"Uhh...no," said Micky, hastily taking control of Al's mind & turning BT into an icecube tray.
"Oh good, we were running out," said Peter happily, filling her with water & putting her in the freezer.
"I wonder if anybody that looks like Micky can do that," Sassip wondered.
"OH SHE IS WONDROUS!!" said Davy, who rolled back, fed her some Sleefish Krimpets, and rolled off again.
"That boy just thinks he can roll in & out any time he wants," Micky said in amazement, & got down as if to roll.

"OH no you don't!" said Sassip, stuffing him into her pouch & zipping it up. "I have orders from Davy and Mike, no rolling for YOU young man. Anyone who would bring drummers into the very Padcabinets must be off his knobs," she said, bouncing off to watch the telly and see if Mike & Davy were getting any news coverage. (They weren't.)
"OMIGOSH WHY AREN'T THEY?! They are cute and stoic deadpan glory!!!" Al screamed, bashing the telly in with an axe.
"LOOK it's Wendy O. Williams!" BT remarked foolishly.
"What?!" said everyone.
"Never mind," BT mumbled, and rolled off. She got news coverage because she was too young to roll around without a chaperone. The police brought her back sometime later.
"MICKYYYY," she screeched, knocking on Sassip's pouch. "You wanna be my rolling chaperone?!"
"WHAT?!" shrieked Micky perturbedly, while Sassip ate BT.
"Oh my gosh, NO MORE PERTURBEDLY OR I QUIT," Mike said, coming back with doggie bags.
"Where's Davy?" said MT.
"In the bag," said Mike, emptying out Davy and a sea of chicken.
"Ooh chicken of the sea?" Sassip said hopefully.
"No but I got you a box of Tuna Kandy Kakes," said Davy, feeding her some.
"EW," yelped BT but nobody heard her.

"You know, people are using me like a cheap suit," Al remarked.
"OWWWWWWWWW," MT yelled. "MOMMY!! One of the piecatchers BIT me!!"
"Awww are you okay honeyyy??" Al said, rushing with much maternity to his aid.
"Uhh...maternity?" said Mike.
"That's better," said Mike nodding in approval between chicken bites.
"Nooo! I was only trying to feed them breffast serals!!" MT wailed.
"Oh ye gods," said BT & coerced Davy into being her chaperone, and they rolled around for six hours until the police nabbed them for being short and not having a building permit.
"But we didn't NEED a building permit, we weren't building!" said Davy in confusion.
"Oh.." said the police but told them not to roll anymore anyway.
"Hmmmmm hey hey you know............... no wait..." said Al. She couldn't think because her head hurt because everyone was using it to do things without asking. "I HATE when people borrow things without asking.." she muttered.
"Al you boof why don't you just do something so he can't get at them?" asked BT.
"Don't call me a... thing.." said Al distractedly. She put up a field around her powers. The good thing was that MT couldn't use them for big things like turning people into things and stuff. The bad thing was that he could change small objects. But that was good enough for everyone so they called it a story.

The End.

Next Issue: Hat comes back and takes over MT who takes over Al who takes over Micky and stuff.......

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