The Dumbest Boofed-Up Manuscript Ever Written

One day BT was being stupid walking around greeting people cheerfully. She strolled through the mind pad.
"Hi Al!"
"Go away BT you are annoying, la la, I am making a THINGY!!!" said Al doing something that nobody knew what & she was distractedly.
"Oh well that was WEIRD," said BT & poofed out & caught Mike just as he was rolling off to a chicken fry party.
"Hi Miiiiike thing," she said singsongily.
"Oh it is a BOOFER!!" Mike said & laughed at her a lot & then rolled off.
"Ugh this is stupid, is there a plot or must I walk around greeting people acting like an idiot??" BT screamed at the author & was on the verge of a tantrum, so the author humored her and moved the story along.
Anyway.

"HIIII MICKYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!" BT shrieked & poked at one of Micky's cymbals. He was screwing around with weird drum things that drummers screw around with, or whatever. You know. "OHMIGOSH DON'T TOUCH MY CYMBALLL YOU'LL CONTAMINATE IT!!" he screeched & kicked her.
"UGH I hate you," said BT & was annoyed & flounced off in a snit.
"Foopy snitflouncer," Micky growled.
"Oh he is weird," said Sassip & stuffed him in her pouch.
"MMMMMTTTTTTTTTT!!" screeched BT from the door of her playroom in the mind pad.
"Hi Beeeeeteeeeeee!!!" MT said cheerfully.
"WHYYYY did you leave lemmyade pops wrappers ALL OVER MY STUFF?!" BT yelled.
"I didn't," said MT in a hurt tone. "There's not any wrappers on your lampshade."
"There is no lampshade here, what the HECK?!" said BT & glared daggers at MT.
"Uhoh, pointy sharp things," MT said & acted like a nervous little kid.
"UGH You look just like Micky when he is a STUPID MORON FOOPER," BT sneered & then got a light bulb.
"Oohhhh SHINY!!!!" MT said & burnt his fingers on it.
Then he made a face that was weird but cute but scary & BT went into conniptions.
"UHOH!!!!! BT gone whonky nuts," said MT, stepping over her convulsing form clumsily & seeing if there were any lemmyade pops left in the sticky wrappers.
"OOOHHHHHHHHH I AM GONNA BREAK THINGGSSSSS," BT shrieked. "I will pop some heads!!" she announced.
MT was horror. Sassip shortly came bounding in (heaven knows how she got in here), obviously distressed.

"MT MT you are HORROR, you have to STOP!" she said frantically.
"Oohhh, hi hi green thingie Sassip poos!! BT went whonky nuts."
"ARGHHH!!! Ooh hey... MT.... ahaaaa you want some breffast serals with milk?" BT said. MT was horror again. "MILK?! Ickyyyyyyy."
"UGHHH ICKY SOUNDS LIKE MICKYYYY.. I mean... You want some lemmyade pops??" she said coaxingly.
"OKAY," said MT cheerfully & BT poofed up some potion-laced pops & blissfully watched him devour them.
"OH DAVY! When did you get here," said Sassip & licked his hair.
"Davy isn't heeereeee green thingie Sassip poos, get off meeeee," said Davy & shoved Sassip away.
"MWAHAHAA, MT is a Davy thing now," BT said & poofed off.
"I'm confused with this script," stated Peter, entering the playroom with Davy, Micky & Al in tow (Mike was off at the chicken fry & was NOT rehearsing his lines, like he should have been).
"Oh, well the Davy in the mindpad is really MT," said Mike, explaining carefully.
"How do you know?" asked Micky.
"Because I READ it instead of ordering the cliffnotes. Geez!"
"Oh.."

"Why is MT ME!?" asked Davy in horror.
Sassip poofed out and shrieked.
"DAVY! HOW DID YOU BE HORROR IN THE MIND PAD WHEN YOU ARE OUT HERE?" she shouted.
"What?" asked Davy.
"I MEAN HOW WERE YOU HORROR OUT HERE WHEN YOU WERE IN THE MIND PAD?" Sassip shrieked.
"What!?" asked Micky.
"Where's Mike? I thought he was here but he's not and I am confused now!" said Mike.
"What?" said Mike who walked in for real.
"Oh sorry, that was me. I accidentally said something dumb," said the author.
"I'll say!" said everyone.
"Hey I'll write you all out of existence!" said the author.
"Oh.. uh.. it was an honest mistake.." said everyone.
"Okay then, anyway.."
So. They all walked around and did stuff.
No wait. Okay. Here's what really happened.

Mike came back right before .. no wait he was away. Yes yes I know.
One day.. now wait.
Okay. So anyway, Davy was standing there looking at himself.
"Hey Sassip why are you licking that Davy? I'm Davy!" said Davy.
Sassip looked at Davy. "What!?" she shrieked in horror. She rolled off to the menagerie to eat Peter's mind fish.
Micky giggled. "Hey now there are two Davys!" he said.
"So? There are two Mickys too!" said Davy.
"Actually there aren't," said BT, coming in.
"Huh?" said everyone.
"You see, Nothing should look like Micky cause I hate him a lot, so I made MT look like Davy cause he's cute!" said BT happily.
"WHAT!?" said Davy and kicked BT.
Mike rolled in. "Hey guys, why aren't you in the pad man?"
"BECAUSE MT and BT and Sassip were in there and then MT is Davy and BT is stupid and Sassip is eating fish," said Micky.
"Ewww.. fish..." said Mike, remembering his stint with eating raw fish.
"Why... are there two Davys?" asked Mike, trying hard not to crack up.
"UGH Mike haven't you read the script?" asked Peter.
"Yes, but Al the author confused me when she got confused and screwed it up royally so I stopped," said Mike.
"Oh yeh me too Mike!" said Micky.
"No, Micky, you just read the cliffnotes," said Mike.
"Oh.. right.. uh.. ehhe," said Micky.

"OMIGOSH TWO DAVYS! WBAHAHAAH," said Mike and rolled off all around the city.
"OH OH!" said Al, running over to turn on the TV. "I BET THAT BOOFER GETS NEWS COVERAGE!"
Sure enough, Mike, the man with the woolhat of everyone's eye was on the news, getting a special report on him that interrupted all the good shows that were on.
"ARGH!" said Al and stamped off with MT in the back.
"WHY did you make MT look like me again!?" shouted Davy.
"Cause I can't take two Mickys cause I hate him so," said BT.
"You do NOT!" said Davy.
"Okay, but no one should remind me of Micky but Micky. It's less icky. OH ICKY MWAHAHA," said BT.
"Oh dear. I am going far far away," said Micky and left to somewhere.
Davy looked about ready to throw BT against the wall when he went after Al.

"CHANGE MT BACK!" he said.
"I can't!" said Al.
"WHY NOT?" asked Davy. Al had MT laying on her operating table and was examining him.
"I don't know. MT, honey, stop fidgeting..." said Al and gazed at him stupidly.
"Ugh that's how you look at meee!" said Davy getting all jealous.
"Ooops gah that's not you you're you OH my what a problem..." said Al.
"MOMMY GIMME POPS!" said MT. Al gave him a pop to shut him up.
"Well!? Why can't you change him back then?" asked Davy.
"Cause BT did something not with her powers. She's getting smarter..." said Al.
"UGH but you should be able to change him back!" shouted Davy.
"But she won't tell me what she did!" said Al and tried to stop grinning dumbly.
"Uh oh.. I think we're losing her.." said Mike, rolling in.
"MIKE MIKE WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!" asked Davy imploringly.
"I liek that song, Davy." said Mike happily.
"No Mike I'm serious!" said Davy. Al was on the floor giggling stupidly.
Micky walked in. "Hey, what's with Al?"
"Um, I think it's cause there's two Davys or something." said Mike abstractly.
BT flounced in snitfully then but luckily nobody commented. 'Cause you know she packs a pretty good-sized can of... um anyway.

"What did you DO to MT you twit???" Davy demanded of her.
"You're too short, I don't think I can trust you with that kind of information," said BT.
"Davy, can I do Pouch Time now?" Sassip said eagerly, bouncing a little.
"OH Uhhhhh I am perfectly willing to volunteer any information, ehehe," BT said changing her tune.
"That's better. Now tell me...WHERE is the hidden microfilm?!"
"Um... Davy?" said BT, feeling his forehead.
"UGH," said Davy, having come to his senses, "DON'T do that."
"Oh well I gave MT some potion-laced pops, but it doesn't matter that I told you because you can't do anything about it," BT said matter-of-factly.
"Oh yeh, why can't we?" Al countered.
"Because you know how little kids absorb sugar. Every lemmyade pop eats goes to the Unknown Little Kid Organ in his system for processing & stays there for heaven knows how long, so the Davyness will stay there for awhile," said BT grinning very evilly until she was thrown out of the room.
"Excuse me, I haven't had any lines in at LEAST a paragraph," said Mike tetchily.
"Ooh sorry, hey Mike let's go get news coverage!" BT said & rolled off with him, causing a scandal which got news coverage as well as tabloid headlines.
"Well if you'd keep your hands off my HAT, the papparazzi wouldn't have-" Mike started.
BT gaped. "I DIDN'T DO ANYTHINNGGGG!!!!! Just because-"
"Oh my they are foopers," said Peter & Micky walking in, dragging BT & Mike respectively to separate places.

"Mommyyyyyyyy??" MT whined.
"Oh Hi Davy baby son!!!" Al said grinning like an idiot.
"Mommy I am the MT Micky thing..."
"We should call you DT!"
"Nnooooooooo!!!" MT said, getting frustrated.
"Deeteeeeeeeee," Al said & rolled all around the room until she knocked into Davy & fell on him.
"WHAT THE... You were already on the floor, *I* was standing up, *I* should have fallen on *YOU*!!" Davy cried.
"Oohhh Davy go cry cry?" said DT/MT sympathetically.
"Hey hey hey, you all know the rules about linebuckets - once you've used a line, it's out of the bucket," Davy reminded them.
"If Canada Day is on a Saturday, that makes it Tainted Seafood Day!" BT screamed, finally working free of Peter's grasp & assaulting Mike brutally.
"Uhoh, that scene should be rated R. She pulled out a can of-" Peter started, but the author cut him off.
"But I was only gonna say-. Oh sheesh, forget it," said Peter & went to play a peaceful game of Eat The Figs with Micky.
"Oh my gosh, I do NOT want to know," said Sassip & stuffed both Davys in her pouch. "Oh there are TWO, isn't it just the best???" she said dreamily & sat on them.
"NO NO NO I want-" Al started.
"Oh Al wants in the pouch too!!!! OKAY!" said Sassip & stuffed her in as well.
Al got boofed into Sassip's pouch. She was about to object when she noticed two Davys.
"OH! TWO!" she said happily and sat there not doing anything but giggling dumbly.
"What? Mommy?" asked MT, poking her.
"Hehehehehehe," said Al dumbly for years.

"Ugh. MT thing, go back to being a Micky thing and not a me thing!" said Davy exasperatedly.
"Huh?" asked MT.
"You are a Davy thing!" said Davy.
"Oh, I thought I shrunked!" said MT.
"NO YOU ARE ME STOP BEING MEE!"
"But Daaayyveee I am not me," said MT.
"Yes you aren't you you are me,"
"No I am not aren't you you aren't me I was you me when you were I," said MT matter-of-factly.
"WHAT!? I just said you aren't Micky you are me!" said Davy.
"That's what I said!" said MT.
"You did NOT!" said Davy.
"MOMMY!" said MT.
"Oh ho the two cute things are fighting.." swooned Al.
"UGH!" said Davy.
"Mommy icky over mee like Beeeteee was when I was Micky thing," said MT.
"There there thingy!" said Sassip and sat on them all.
"MOOOMMY!" shouted MT.
"Hehe I like hair," said Al and ruffed up MT's hair cause he was closest.

"UGH SASSIP LET US OUT! OR.. stuff will happen.." said Davy in fear.
"STUFF!?" said Sassip.
"Yes. Horrible crabby stuff." said Davy evilly.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" shouted Sassip and expelled the contents of her pouch all over Micky.
"Ouch. Oh there's Davy cause I fell on him." said Micky, noting that there was a Davy on top of him and a Davy below him. Al was somewhere on the wall.
"Someone peel me off," she said.
Mike got up on a chair and peeled her off. He was about to roll off again but Al fell on him and swooned. Swooning is heavy.
Mike laboriously rolled all around the city with a swooned Al on his hat. This kicked up HUGE commentary and Mike refrained from rolling and tried to kill Al.
Al however, was too out of it to notice, and tralala-ed through several sharp and deadly traps without a care in the world. She got a nice hair cut, suffice to say.
Eventually Mike got bored, and especially convinced to stop when Sassip accidentally got caught in a club trap and put Mike in Pouch Time for five days straight.

*Five days later...*
"AAAIIIRRRR OHH I MISSED YOU SOOO," said Mike, breathing in copious amounts of oxygen.
Davy was sprawled on the couch, looking tired. "She won't change Davy back. I mean Micky. I mean-"
"Oh, man, you look terrible," said Mike. "Let's go, man!!"
Davy gave Mike a look of lifeless apathy. "Where is left, for ones such as us, who have no-"
"Oh for cripes sake, knock it OFF and let's roll off to a chicken fry party," said Mike in disgust, dragging him off.
"I swear, he is ADDICTED. I should open up a can of- HEY!! Will you PLEEEASE let me finish my line?!" BT said irritably.
"BT, you really should change MT back, cause Al is acting so dumb so constantly I keep getting funny lil headaches that disappear & come back at random intervals..." Peter said.
"Geez I keep telling you, I CAN'T!! He's stuck that way until the sugar hype wears off," BT said stubbornly.
Peter sighed. Sassip was asleep and had drooled all over everything. Consequentially, BT & Peter were ankle deep.
"Daaavy I FOUND YOOOOUUU," shrieked Al with laughter & sat on him.
"Oh my gosh, THAT IS STUPID!!!" screeched BT & proceeded to laugh a lot.
Then Micky came in & was confused. "Whaaaaaaaaa??" he said & was dumb.
"OH HEHEE Micky I FOUUNNDD YOOOUUUUU," giggled BT & sat on him and everyone looked at her. "WHAT?!" she said annoyedly.
Suddenly Micky woke up from wherever his brain had gone. "Oh, but you see I am not a chair tra-la," he said & dropped BT instantly.
"Oh, my BRIDGE!" said BT.
"WHAT???!!!" said everyone in complete and utter confusion.
"There hasn't been story this confusing since that one where we all traded bodies," remarked Peter.

"BEeeeeeteeeeeeeeeeee I'm TIRED of being Davy!" MT complained.
"Why? He is little and cute and nice unlike some people who are EVIL although they make good chairs," said BT.
"But I am not tall now!"
"Awwww, are you upset because Al is all foopy of you? That's what's wrong isn't it? Of course..."
"No, it just bothers me that I am all little and-"
"I bet you wish Al wasn't your mommy anymore, do you want me to be your mommy? I bet you do, I bet you do, oh aren't you a cute lil thing!" said BT, picking up MT & making off with him.
"No no no no STOPPP!!!" said MT & was very frustrated & dropped to the floor. "I want to be me normal Mickyness miiiinnnee!"
"No no I think I should be your mother and everything will be fine because the thingy will happen and Sassip will live happily in a boofercage. Um, I mean..." BT said and was confused.
MT got really mad & kicked something. "WHY DON'T YOU MAKE ME NORMAL MEEE??? I WANT LEMMYADE POPS!!!" he shouted & proceeded to cry loudly until he fell asleep. All eyes immediately turned to BT, including those of Davy & Mike (who had since returned with doggie trucks).
"Umm.... I.... ehehe..." said BT & opened up a can of... are the censors looking? ... apparently not.
And then she opened up a can of Reddi-Wip & sprayed it in all the eyes & made her getaway.

"Darn that boofer." said Al.
"Because she made you blind for a second and ran away cowardly?" asked Micky.
"No, because she took away the double Davyness for a whole minute!" Al whined stupidly.
"Ugh." said Sassip and punted her. Unfortunately it had no effect.
"WHAT!?" said Sassip and was horror so she ran out to the ocean to eat fish.
"MOMMY MAKE ME MT MICKY THING AGAIN!" said MT.
"I uh.. what?" said Al.
"Make him him again!" said Davy.
"I would but I can't think......." said Al, with a big fat stupid dumb vacant stare.
"Davy, you leave." said Mike.
"Oh no no no Davy can't leave no not him not the other one not any of them they must all stay!" said Al whimperingly.
"Hey wait, if BT said the sugar made him Davy and he fell asleep, wouldn't he be back to normal?" asked Mike.
"Huh?" asked Al stupidly.
"Sugar make ppl go whonky woo. No sugar make ppl sleep." said Mike. "MT go sleepy byes and that mean he have no sugar. Sugar what make MT Davy."
"Ohhh riiighhhtt.... no wait I still don't get it." said Al. "I had it, but then I lost it..."
"Oh she's drooling!" said Sassip accusatorily.
"No she's not!" said Davy.
"Is anyone else highly disturbed by the fact that the author wrote "ppl" instead of "people"?" asked Peter.
"I am! She had to do it in the middle of my speech man!" said Mike. "But I ignored it." "Oh okay just checking." said Peter.
"Right, Mike, let's ROLL!" said Davy.
"OH DAVY'S BACK! YAY!" said Mike and they rolled off together.
Al was still stupid because the presence of two Davys in the world was phenomenally fooping up the cute balance.

"Cripes, if someone doesn't do something she's stuck as a dummard." said Micky.
"Hey that means you'll be smarter than her!" said Peter.
"I already am!" said Micky, looking confused.
"Geez where is BT? Come on Sassip. We're gonna rough her up a bit." said Micky.
"OOOH ROUGHING UP!" said Sassip evilly, rubbing her flippers together.
Mike rolled back to help. "I told Davy to stay at the chicken fry."
"Good. Let's go!"
They all left Al sitting on the floor with MT giggling stupidly.
"You don't think she'll.. .... try and.. uh.. snog him.." asked Micky.
"Oh yeh Micky's right." said Mike.
Peter went back and grabbed MT, but Al was too whacked out on cuteness to notice the abhorent lack of it.
They all wandered around the mind pad til they foud BT who had apparently disappeared into her room.

"Oh uh.. hi guys.. whatcha up to?" she asked sweetly.
"YOU are going to turn him back NOW!" said Davy forcefully.
"No!" said BT and sat down.
"YES!" said Mike and picked her up and shoved her into Sassip's pouch.
"Ugh." said BT but still refused.
"Look the sugar thing didn't work. It wore off after 5 days or something and he is still Davy."
"Well how should *I* know!?"
"YOU make a potion that turns him back into Micky."
Suddenly the impact of it all hit Micky. "OH no wait I don't want him to be ME again." said Micky.
"YES YES YOU DO!" said Mike and nudged him hard in the ribs.
"NO OUCH NO OUCH NO I DOn'T OUCH MIIIIKKEEE STOP!" Micky shouted and whinged.
Sassip ate Micky.
"Thanks girl!" said Mike happily.
Sassip ate Mike's hat.
"GIMMME!" said Mike and attacked Sassip.
"Hey! Sassip has a hat just like Mike's in here!" said Micky from inside Sassip.
"Um, guys.. we have to change MT back remember?" Peter suggested.
"Oh right. BT. NOW!" said Mike through gritted teeth, because his hat was oh-so-much more important and this stupid game was getting annoying.
So BT reluctantly acquiesced.

The next day, Mike brought Davy back from the chicken fry after a wild shindig which he just HAD to stay for.
"Man they let you fry your OWN chicken!" said Mike.
"I know! Is that not too much!?" said Davy, overwhelmed by it all.
"DAYYYVEE!" said MT, proffering poundcake.
"OH YUM!" said Davy. "Oh, 'ey, you aren't ME anymore! YIPPPEEE!" said Davy and threw all the poundcake.
"OH that's a first!" said Al, walking in groggily.
"What's wrong with you?" asked BT huffily.
"Cuteness hangover ugh." said Al.
Everyone laughed at her when she beat up BT for making her dumb and causing a hangover, and then she turned BT into Ibuprofen and took her to quell the constant pounding. Unfortunately BT made the headache worse because she was evil so Al made her get out of her bloodstream but BT was purple because Al's blood is very staining and BT was mad at Al for 6 months cause she likes green better.

The End.

Next Issue: Sassip eats Peter and accidentally lays him in an egg, which means.....

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