Oh dear...oh dear dear dear...
Ask Your Mommy And Daddy

One Day like Al promised she made MT real. This made BT and Micky really annoyed but Micky got over it since MT was certainly not in any way like him.
BT, however, was quite irate that Micky had ceased being irate, and the fact that now she couldn't abuse MT as much because everyone would say she was a child basher.
Then again, Al did it to her so who cared.
Except ppl tended to think MT was actually a kid. The dummards!

Al interrupted BT's complex thought. "You did it again!" she said.
BT blinked at her. "What?"
"You THOUGHT. Stop thinking! You daze out!" said Davy walking by. Sassip followed him into the kitchen.
"Oh, where are we?" BT muttered.
"In the Monkees' pad. Anyway, MT is real now!" Al said ruffling his nice hair.
"OH NO HE HAS NICE HAIR NOW!" said BT. But she was drawn to it like a moth to a lantern.
Micky was totally engrossed in a book and refused to show any emotion towards MT or BT.
"See? Micky has come to terms with a him look-alike. You should too. I mean he IS your kid! Sheesh!" said Al. She prompted BT to hug MT or something motherly.
"BLECK!" said BT dropping the hair.

"Mommy, where's Daddy?" asked MT out of nowhere.
BT was knocked over by an invisible force... the Kiddie-question.. dun dun dun!
"NOOOO!!!! NOOOO! DON'T ASK ME STUPID KID QUESTIONS!" shouted BT and ran around.
"Well, since I look like Micky than is he my Daddy?" asked MT.
Micky raised an eyebrow but restrained himself.
BT stopped in her tracks. "NO. But I wish he WAS and we were married and.." but MT wasn't listening.
"And if he's my daddy and you're my mommy...." said MT.
Al giggled.
"And Aaaaaallllll is Micky's mommy," said MT.
"Hey no.. wait!" said Al. "I'm younger than him! How would THAT work?!"

MT seemed fazed by the reverse kiddie-question.. dun dun dun! but not for long.
"I LOVE YOU AAALLLL"! said MT hugging Al.
"No its AL. Just AL. Not AAALLL." said Al.
"I LOVE YOU DADDY!" shouted MT leaping into Micky's lap.
"OUUURWWGWWH!" said Micky, falling over backwards.
"DADDY!" said MT playing with his hair.
"ARGH" said Micky, showing emotion.
"NOOOOOOOOO! MINE!" shouted BT ripping MT's hair out violently.
"MOOOMMMYYYY!!!" shouted MT and proceeded to cry.
"Oh geesh!" said Micky and left ASAP.
"NO NO NO BT!" said Al poofing his hair back. "HE'S just a KID!"
"Tank you Aaaaallll!" said MT.
Al sighed and went back to watching Davy and Sassip.

Mike picked that moment to enter & say, "Hey...what's goin' on?"
"MT has decided that Micky is his father & BT is his mother & he still likes Al because she's the only person who's nice to him," Davy said absently.
Mike's face contorted, & then he burst out laughing. "Oh man...you...MT...with the...and...and he's real now too...and...OH MAN," he said & rolled around giggling his head off.
"Mike, that is VERY out of character," Al informed him sternly.
"Oh, right...sorry," Mike said, standing up & chuckling lightly. Then he walked off to do something that nobody knew quite what he was doing. "Mike where you goin'?" said BT.
"I'm going to plant a spark plug from the Monkeemobile & see if it grows," Mike said, & went outside.
"Uh-huh, right, you do that," said Al.

"Hey, guys, where's Micky? He owes me fifty cents," said Peter, entering.
"He left, because MT thinks he's his father," said BT.
"MT thinks he's MICKY'S FATHER?!" Peter said in a shocked tone.
"Nnnooooooooooo," BT said disgustedly. "MT thinks Micky's is MT's father, & he thinks I'm his mother. And he's real now."
"I know, you told me in the last story. Well, anyway, where is Micky?" "We dunno," said everyone.
"Oh, well, bye. Hey, does that make me MT's grandfather?"
MT's eyes lit up. "Aaaaaaalllllll's married to Peter?!"
"NO NO NO no no no no no," Al said hurriedly. "Peter is your GREAT-grandfather...I'm just your ... uh, I'm your friend."
MT looked confused. "Well, OK. Where's Daddy?"
"WE DUNNO," said everyone again.
"Hey, uh, BT, do that thing that that thing is that you do," said Al. "Huh?" said BT blankly.
"YOU know, the THING," Al said.
BT looked blank, still. "OHHHH the THING!!" she said in sudden realization.

"MMMICCCCKYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY," she screeched at the top of her figmental little lungs.
"WHAAATTT???!!" yelled the aforementioned Monkee, poofing in & looking tired.
"You owe Peter fifty cents & ... MT wants you to play with him," she said evilly.
"Ooohhh goody, can we play catch huh huh can we Micky Daddy person thing?" MT said eagerly.
Micky groaned and popped out after depositing $.50 in Peter's outstretched palm.
"Wow I can buy a ton of popsicles!" said Peter.
"Oh me too me too!" said MT sidling up to him.
"Uh.... yeh MT I'll get you one. What flavor?" Peter said kindly.
"I wanna go with you!" said MT.
Al and BT shook their heads.
"Nah, Al and your Mommy said no." said Peter.
"PETER!" shouted BT, punching Peter angrily.
"Hey ouch I was.. ouch!" said Peter.
"Mommmmeeeeeeeee! Stop punching Peter grandad thing!" said MT poutily.
"Hey, you're supposed to be on MY side!" BT said huffily. Just then Davy ran by and Sassip followed, running BT over.
"Oouurrgghgh!" said BT.
"That was pointless!" said Al.

"So what are we going to do with MT?" said Micky, poofing in again and sighing heavily.
"DADDY!" said MT, but Micky stopped him before he attached himself to Micky.
"Okay, a few ground rules. I'm NOT your Daddy. You just look like me cause your mommy, BT is a nit. Al is BT's creator which I guess makes you her grandson in a sense. And Peter is Al's creator which I guess makes him your Great grandfather. But I have NO relation or have created you in anyway. Got it?" said Micky tiredly.
MT just stared.
"Oh brother..." said Micky, placing his head in his hands.
"DADDY!" said MT again.
"Look, you don't HAVE a Daddy!" Micky said.
MT looked at Al. "Aaaaallll!?" he said with a hurt look on his face.
"Ah, well... um.. sure. He's your Daddy.. I guess... BUt not really okay MT?"
MT looked confused.
"MOMMMMYYY!!!" he said.

daddycausehe'sameaniehead!" said BT inhaling deeply when she was done.

"Aaaalll!!" said MT again.
"Okay, Micky is NOT your father at all or anything. I am your grandmother, BT is your mother and Peter is your great grandfather. Davy is of no relation and neither is Sassip or Mike. Dig?" said Al.
"Okay!" said MT and began to dig a hole in the floor.
BT pouted. "I AM NOT THAT THING'S MOTHERRR!" she shrieked.
Al threw a very heavy and spiked book at BT.
"BE NICE! He's a real boy and he's very nice!" she said angrily.
BT pouted. "I dun wanna be his mommmyy!" she whinged.
"I WANT MY MOMMY!" whinged MT.
"I WANT A POPSICLE!" whinged Peter.
"UGH!" whinged Al.
"Hey that wasn't whinging!" said Al angrily.
"IIIIIIII AAAAAAAAAAM NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOT ANYBODY'S MOTHERRRRRRRR I AM TOO YOUNG TO BE A MOTHER!!!!" BT cried & shrieked & screamed & banged her head & threw things & had a general hissy fit.
MT took one look at her & burst into tears. While Peter was comforting him, Al took BT aside & reprimanded her sharply.

"BT. He is REAL. You have to stop this NOW, you are behaving like a VERY naughty figment and I WILL put you in the room you can't get out of & you will have no Micky ever again."
"I don't CAAARRRRRE," BT shouted.
"Oh, stop carrying on so," Al snapped. "Now you be NICE to MT, because he is NOT a robot and he isn't even as old as you are, he's a little kid."
"But he looks like Micky, and he was supposed to BE Micky and I was only trying to make something that would LIKE me because none of you do, and-" BT trailed off & started crying.
"Don't think you're getting any of that sap past me, that's tripe that is," said Al.
"You're right," said BT, smiling sunnily.
BT frowned. "He isn't SUPPOSED to be real," she muttered & stalked off to make pretty rainbowy things in Peter's mind.

"Where's Mommy goed?" said MT.
"Goed?" said Peter. "Al...help me...his IQ is on my level..."
"Mommy went in Peter's head to make pretty rainbowy things," Al said, & poofed up a snack for Sassip because she was trying to eat Davy's hair, & he didn't like it.
"Do you think since Mommy made me, she could make Daddy?"
"Uhhhhhh, I don't think that would be a very good idea," said Al.
"I wanna ask her!" said MT, & tried to poof out...but he only made himself purple.
"Huuuuhhh? I'm purple!"
"OOOOO THAT TICKLES EHEHHEE," said Davy foolishly, because Sassip was trying to munch his hair again.
"Why is the big monster thing biting Davy's head?" said MT.
"Because his hair is all nice and yummy now go find your Mommy," said Al & brushed him off.
Davy looked puzzled. "Is not!"
"I should know, I ate some," Al said painfully.
"Oh, right...Sassip, we don't want you to turn into anything, so lay off the hair & eat the nice Al snack," Davy cooed. Sassip obliged.
"He's PURPLE!" Peter shrieked.
"I know, I made me purple trying to find Mommy," said MT just as Mike walked in.
"Any luck with the spark plug?" Al inquired.
"Nope," said Mike. "What in the WORLD is MT talking about?"
"Don't even ask. I am NOT prepared to give another set of poofing lessons, I've taught more people how to poof in the last week than I have in my entire figmental LIFE," Al said & went to read a book & be emotionless.

Mike shrugged.
Peter ruffled MT's hair fondly. "Its neat to have a great grand kid without all the kid and grandkid work." he said stupidly.
MT giggled and grinned and hugged Peter.
Peter got him a lolly and picked him up (somehow) and then put him down again. "Hmm, I can't really get you into my mind with me." said Peter.
"HUH?!" said MT.
"Oh, um, imagine this okay." said Peter, making motions in the air.
"HUH!?" said MT.
"Oh, okay..." said Peter drawing the purple portal on a piece of paper.
"Ooooh!" said MT.
"No, imagine yourself walking through it. Close your eyes. Okay? Now, imagine yourself walking into the purple portal..."
MT poofed out. Peter laid down and poofed out as well. MT was standing in the middle of the mind pad looking scared.
"I uh.. can't find Mommy! I saw her but she's gone!" he sniffed.
"Ah, it's okay MT. BT! Come on! Get out of there!" Peter called.
BT sulkily came out.

"Peter I don't want to.." but Peter grabbed her mouth before she had a chance to speak. "MT you stay there. I gotta ask your Mommy something okay?"
MT nodded and looked around the pad somemore.
"BT be NICE!" said Peter.
"That's what Al said." whined BT.
"Well he's real and.." started Peter.
"Well, you can't go around creating people and..."
"But he WASN'T a person!" said BT huffily.
"Well, he is now and even so.. just pretend he's Micky huh?" said Peter, knowing if Micky were around he'd kill him.
BT sighed.
"Look, you can do stuff with MT you can't do with Micky! Like play with his hair forever and sit in his lap even if you asked."
BT sighed. "I guess its the closest thing to Micky.. but he's so DUMB!" said BT.
Peter looked taken aback.
"Er.. I mean.." BT started to explain.
"Nah, but he'll get smarter... you just gotta be patient! But he won't ever like you like you want him too! So, you just gotta play with his hair and..."
"Peter you already said that!" said BT giggling.
"Okay then. Well go be nice huh!?" said Peter.
"Okaaayyy..." said BT and shuffled off to MT.

"MOOMMMMMYYY!" cried MT when he caught sight of her.
"Hi, uh, MT. Now look. I'm going to be your mommy but you have to learn fast and let me sit in your lap and play with your hair okay?" said BT wasting no time.
"Uh, okay Mommy!" said MT happily and they poofed out to find Davy astride Sassip with Mike sitting on her head and Al reading a book with Micky reading it over her shoulder.
Peter followed and stretched and got up from the couch.
"I think that's the wrong word." said Micky.
"WHAT!?" said Al. "Stop reading my mind! Sheesh!"
"Sorry but I thought you should know." said Micky.
"Wheeee! Sassip! Yay! You're great girl!" shrieked Davy with delight.
"I know!" said Sassip.
"Ah, what a stuck up sea monster," said Mike.

But he was enjoying himself as well. They galloped around the pad and Micky and Al read each other's minds and corrected each other and BT played for hours with MT's hair and Peter ate 50 cents worth of popsicles.
The End!

Next Issue: BT dies somehow and goes to Figment *cuckoo!*

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