Sea Monkees!
Your Fish Is Fried

Everyone was playing Scrabble in teams: Mike/BT, Peter/Davy, & Al/Micky. It was Peter/Davy's turn. Finally, Peter took a K & a blank tile from the rack and placing them on the board, proclaimed "KRETCH!" triumphantly.
"Oh, Pet'ah, that's not a word!" Davy protested.
"It is so!" shouted BT.
"Whose side are you on?" Mike griped, and flicked BT's arm.
"Fourteen points," announced Al, who was keeping score.

Suddenly, Micky leapt up onto the table, scattering tiles in every direction. "Hey, guys!! I just remembered - IT'S CANADA DAY!!"
"Heeeeeeyyyyyy!!!!" yelled Al, Davy & BT.
Mike got up next to Micky and declared, "That's right! We should celebrate...but how?"
"PARRRTYYYYY!" BT shrieked, and jumped up beside them. "Man, it's gettin' crowded," Micky complained.
"I know!" Peter exclaimed, knocking Mike & Micky off the table. "SEAFOOD!"

"But what does seafood have to do with Canada Day?" said Mike, disentangling himself from Micky, who was freaking out for reasons unknown.
"What does Canada Day have to do with us?" Al replied.
Davy looked offended. "I'm Canadian, obviously."
"Noooo you're English!" cried Al.
Davy thought about that for a minute. "'Ey, I suppose I am. Oh well, I guess there's no reason, then." But Mike & Micky were already out the door & gone, presumably to order the aforementioned seafood.

Davy went to look for paper plates, & Al folded up the Scrabble board. Peter & BT were engaged in some sort of game which apparently revolved around stacking Scrabble tiles on top of one another.
"Guys, we probably should put those up before M&M come back and mess 'em up again," Al said, holding the bag out.
Peter looked unsettled at the prospect, and shoved a couple stacks into the bag. BT seemed about to sulk, but then she brightened up.
"Ooohhhhhh, I bet if I go get some pickles & make lasagna, I can do SANDWICHES!" she cried gleefully, and poofed out.
"Right. You go do that," Al said, grimacing.

Shortly, Micky & Mike returned with fishie food for all, & BT did indeed bake sandwiches. BT ate two, Micky (being the only other member of the household who would eat them willingly) ate three, & Peter tried one, although he didn't care much for it. Everyone else stuffed themselves on fish, shrimp, lobster, oysters, & other seafoody comestibles.

"That was good!" Mike said, crumpling up a napkin & firing it into the trashcan.
"I think Davy's shoes are turning green," Al said, staring intently.
Davy stood up to panic, but he fell back down. "Eeeeek, my feet are all slippery!"
Suddenly, Al & Mike slipped & fell down just like Davy. "Oh man it's happening to me too!" Mike yelled, and flopped around.
"I think," Al said slowly, "we're turning into mermaids."
Micky & Peter stared at each for a moment, and then burst out laughing.
BT slapped them both upside their heads, & said, "If they're going to do a silly thing like that, we might as well get them out to the beach."

By the time Peter, BT & Micky had managed to drag the fishy trio out to the water, they'd almost changed totally. A massive water fight ensued.
"Micky...what day is it?" Peter asked suddenly.
"Saturday, July 1st," he replied.
Peter looked gravely at BT, who shouted, "MICKY YOU FOOPY NIT!!!!! If Canada Day is on a Saturday, that makes it Tainted Seafood Day!" and shoved Micky hard. "Aaaahhhhhhhh!!" he yelled, & fell backwards into the water.
BT had started to change too, & Peter was getting a little green around the toes.
"Eeeeeeekk, this can't happen to meeee, I can't swim!!" BT whined inevitably.
"Oh well, this is a good chance for you to learn to swim," said Peter, kicking BT in as well, & jumping after her.

"WAAAHHH!!!" cried Al. "I forgot! I don't even LIKE seafoood!" she made the worst face.
"Davy, what are you doing?" asked Mike.
Davy was standing in the water on his tailfin laughing hysterically at Al.
"Man that's the funniest face I've ever seen!" he said.
"Well, we know DAVY'S whacked out o his head." said Micky, who wasn't quite as changed as Al, Davy and Mike.
Peter was more changed than BT and Micky, but not so much as the other three.
"It seems as if whoever ate the most fish changes the fastest!" said Micky.
"Wow, you're so smart!" said Peter.
"Yeh.. just so smart." said Davy who had stopped panicking and became rather grim.

"Hey, where's Al?" asked BT.
Al was out a bit deeper having a bit of fun with a dolphin. They had found a ball and were swimming around chucking it about.
"Hey guys, this ain't bad!" she called from the water.
The others were still standing around on their fins. BT didn't wanna go in.
"I DON'T wanna go in!" she said.
"Come on, BT, you gotta go in, or else you'll die." said Micky.
"But I am in the water already." BT said impishly.
"Nono you have to get out there in the deep end." said Mike, pushing her.
"NONO!" said BT, pushing back.
"Come on BT! If you don't come in you'll dry up and turn into baked mermaid!" shouted Al.
"Oooohhh, really??" BT said with an interested look.
"YES. But that's BAD," Al said.
BT turned around and sulked. "Not coming."

Davy & Peter splashed over & each of them grabbed one of BT's arms & dragged her out into the water. "See, you twit, you can swim," Davy said, letting go abruptly, and BT sank. Then she came back up.
"DON'T YOU EVER DO THAT AGAINOOHHHHH I'M GONNA-" BT started screeching and yelling and throwing a general fit. She stopped long enough to whirl her tail-mermaid-type-thing around and send a giant wave towards Davy.
"EEEK!" he cried, & ducked underwater.
"Foop," BT said, & brushed algae out of her hair. "Yuck."
"Oohhhh, I found a starfish!" Micky said.
Al was about to comment on the algae bit, but she was whacked by another splashywave thing from Peter.
"HEEEYYYYY knockitoff!!!" she said, & another massive water fight ensued.

This went on for about fifteen minutes, until Mike got sick of it, & blew a shell like a whistle. Everyone stuck their fingers in the ears & squinted until they could hear again.
"Okay, look, this is great fun - but what if someone sees us, man?"
"True. If they see us we're science fodder!" said Al.
"Aw, but I wanna play with the dolphins and all that!" said Peter in a kiddie whiney voice.
BT was sticking Mike's shell into Micky's ear. "HEEEELLOOO!!" she shouted.
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!" cried Micky, and flicked himself about 5 feet into the air.
Since they weren't far from the beach, someone saw him.
"WOW! Look at that mermaid!" they said. "MERMAID?!?!?!" and ran over to investigate.
"NOW look!" said Mike.
"Well were are we sposed to go!?" shrieked Micky in alarm.
"Man... what's with this where are we sposed to go thing? We have the whole OCEAN to go!" said Al.
"Um, actually...." said BT, and before they knew it, a big boat had caught them up in a net.

"Ooohhhh dear............" said Davy.
"HEEEEEEELLPHELPHELP!" cried Micky and Peter.
"Well well what have we here?" a stocky man said, poking the group with a long stick.
"Hey!" cried Al, snatching the stick and poking the man. "What have WE here?"
"HEY!" cried the man and snatched the stick back.
"Hey guys! Take em to the Aquarium! It'll be a fine display!"

Davy moaned, Peter cried, Mike got angry, Al fell asleep, BT ate a soggy sandwich she had in her pocket, and Micky kept trying to steal it. Finally they arrived at the aquarium and were unsurreptiously showed their tank. It was a large circular tank, big enough for the 6 of them to swim comfortably. There was a section of it above water in case they wanted to sun themselves a bit. But the whole place was enclosed, and the only opening was high up near the ceiling, which was connected to a high ledge with a ladder, which even if they could reach, would be impossible to climb.

"HEYYYY how are we gonna get out of this?" screeched Micky.
"Look man I TOLD you not to make a lot of noise or anything and you had to whoop it up and jump into the air!" said Mike huffily.
"Well.. but BT.. she.. um..." Micky started.
"I nuttin! You let me!" said BT indignantly.
Micky sighed and went to look for the bit of sandwich BT dropped. He dived under the water and quickly resurfaced.
"Uh.. guys.. we're.. uh. being watched..." he said, pointing down.
Davy dove down and soon resurfaced.
"He's right!!! There is a crowd of people.. it seems this tank is inside a building... there are three levels that people can look at us and right now...." but just as he started a large crowd walked by and gaped. Davy pulled his patented fish face and half of them ran away, the other half started laughing hysterically. Davy hmphed.
"Davy Davy make the shoe face!!" Al said.
Davy did so, & half of the remaining people left.
"That," said BT, "is the oddest thing I have ever seen."
Micky made a rotten houseguest face, & they kept making faces until there were only 3 people left...but one of them was asleep, so it didn't matter. All this was terrific fun for awhile, but after a couple hours it got boring. A huge new crowd of people came in & BT & Peter got scared half to death & hid behind everyone else.

Al got sick of this, & so she put a window screen all around the tank & nobody could see them anymore.
"That's better," she said, & swam around satisfiedly.
"Is satisfiedly a word?" Davy wondered.
"Don't think so," said Micky, munching on the soggy sandwich remains (which he had found).
"We knowwwwwwwww," said everybody.
"Hmph," said BT, & went to sleep.
"I wish Mike was here," Peter mused.
"I am here," Mike said.
"MIKE!!! I'm so glad you're here!!" Peter said, splashing around happily.

"MustgetoutmustgetouttoocrampedsmallspacenotenoughlighttoosmalldontwannabeamermaidEEEEEEK," screeched Micky.
Al looked annoyed. "Why is it you always have to screech 40,000 words at unprecedented speed all the time? It's SILLY," she said, & smacked him upside the head.
"Ouch," Micky said, & stared at the water in front of him, willing a sandwich to appear. (Needless to say, it didn't.)
"It is awfully cramped in here," Davy said.
"Well, they think we are fish or something. They usually swim around underwater in circles. Stupid aquarium people." Al huffed.
Micky was still willing a sandwich to appear. She was still annoyed with him.
"For geez sake! Micky! You do it like THIS" she said, and POOF, one appeared.
Micky got wide eyed and happy and grabbed it before it got soggy. He happily gnawed away at it.

Al sighed and swam onto a rock and began sunning herself. The others were staring and she turned bright red. Her purple fins were showing and she stared back menacingly.
"WHAT!> You've never seen purple fins before?" she growled. She wasn't inthe mood.
Well, in case you are wondering, Davy had light blue fins, Al had purple (obviously), BT had red, Peter had orange, Mike had dark blue, and Micky had green. No wait. Davy has green fins. But anyway, it was something like that.
So anyway, Al was annoyed cause everyone was looking at her sillily.
"No no we're not looking at your fins." said Davy.
"WHAT!? My fins ain't good enough to gawk at?" said Al huffily.
"No, sheesh, we were just wondering why you didn't just turn us all back?" said Mike, also somewhat edgy.

Al looked thoughtful for a while and then shrugged.
"I dunno." she said, point blank.
"OIY!" sighed everyone.
"Well, I guess we oughta change back so the mean people let us go!" said Al. Everyone but BT swam over to the rocks.

"BT, don't you want to sit on the rocks?" said Davy.
"Why?" said BT.
"So that when you turn back you won't drown?" said Micky.
"No. I think I can swim now."
"You sure?" asked Peter.
"Yup!" said BT.
"Okay here we go!" said Al. And POOF they were all back to normal.
"Um, guys..." said BT, as she slowly sunk into the water with nothing but bubbles where she was.
The others looked around and sighed.

"I'll get her." said Al, who poofed her back on land. She was laying flat on the rocks flailing her legs and arms pathetically.
"Uh, BT, you're safe" said Micky, poking her with his sandwich.
"YUM! Food makes me hungry!" she said, grabbing it and devouring it.
Al looked puzzled at this remark but let it go.
"Hey, aren't you sposed to wait half an hour after swimming to eat?" asked Peter.
"No Peter!" said everyone, and Davy and Micky covered hisface with his hands.

Al sighed and removed the shades around the tank. As soon as the people saw they weren't mermaids, they demanded their money back, and the group was kicked out promtly.
And so life continued as usual, BT still can't swim, Peter had his hands over his eyes for an hour before he realized he could remove them, everyone was annoyed at Al, because she forgot to change them back right away, and when they got home to call up the seafood resturant, it was somehow..... NOT THERE...

"IT'S GONE!" said everyone. And that's the end of that!

Next Issue: BT gets turned into a cat. Meow meow.

Back to the scary "It nerks like kretch to me" thing
On to the next scary thing
Back to the main page
Hosted by