Hello again fellow spectators to this (at the risk of sounding like
Tom Cochrane) mad, mad world. At the end of this mail, another beautiful of The Bone whoring himself without shame. Well, George W and his army of cokeheads, alcoholics, and flower
children have YET to capture the Turban Cowboy, so there's nothing to rant about on that front. BUT, since this is Ossified, I must find SOMETHING to bitch and piss and moan about, so I've found a topic we ALL can agree on. It deals with the increasing lack of proper customer service, and all around ignorance in stores.
Take today, for example. I was at work, and calling around to see who had Ozzy's new album in stock (it was just released toady, and I callled at 10:10 - giving them all of 10 minutes to get it on the shelf). I called wal-mart first, cuz wal-mart and Future Shop usually have the cheapest prices on cds. Dude at the electronics department answers the phone and I say to him "do you have new Ozzy in yet?" He says "what?" I say "Ozzy's new album - is it in yet" Then, he says the 2 most unbelievable words I've EVER heard spoken from a human being's mouth. His response to my asking if the new Ozzy album was in yet? "who's that" he says.
I almost lost it. With a VERY rude tone of voice, I say OZZY OSBOURNE - his new album, is it in yet?" He then says "I don't think so" There was about 10 seconds of dead air, as I was waiting for him to say "let me check", but nothing came from the other end. Finally, I say to him "can you see cuz it's supposed to be in today" He goes to check.
Now, I'm sure we all have called a store to ask if they had this or that, and when they went to check, they would check the price too, anticipating that they would be asked upon confirmation of availability. Well, swolen - colon boy comes back and confirms they have it. I ask him what the price was (cause I'm a cheap fuck looking for a deal). Guess what happened next?
He actually fucking sighed, yes, he SIGHED, and said "I don't know man" Now, I was at work, so I copuldn't exactly tell him what I REALLY thought of him, so I ended the conversation by saying "sorry to make you work on your 8 -hour coffe break" and just hung up. Not very creative, but about all I could muster in a censored situation. After that, I shot out to Future Shop. The dude in the cd department told me the new releases weren't on the shelves yet. At this point, I actually was gritting my teeth and using every bit of restraint I could manage. But, that is when all became well. He says "they're all over here, I'm just tagging them. I can dig one out for ya if you want" THAT'S the way it is supposed to be at these places. Of course, it was short lived, to an extent. the music guy was good, I'm guessing, cuz he's a music lover and KNOWS what it's like to be waiting for a new release. As I was leaving, Jeff Himelman and Tim Garrity came in. I got back to work, and much to my surprise, they were already back at theirs. Now, like I said, they were entering as I was leaving. Turns out, they stood there for like 5 minutes, noone waited on them, so they left.
Makes me wonder - why do they do this? Is it cuz they look at it as just a job, so they don't care, as long as every second week they get to make their trip to the bank? Or is it discrmination. You know, they work on a commission basis, so they pick and choose who they work. Timmy - if you are reading this, remember at the furniture store? When I was hanging with Tim in Calgary, we went to look at super deluxe stereos cuz he was wanting an upgrade. They see me, all hungover, wearing a hat, and Tim, who doesn't look old at all, and think "why bother, they're not buying anything" and thus let us stand there for like 15 minutes like a couple of hard-ons. It's just amazing - these people actually fear having to do what they get paid for.
You know, I used to order special orders at fast food restaurants cuz I didn't wanna eat a burger that was sitting around for 20 minutes, but now I'm afraid too - these little punks probably would be so resentful of having to actually pu an effort into it, that I would be willing to bet I'd be eating a Quareter Pounder with cheese and spit. Oh well, I suppose there's not much sense in bitching, cuz it's only gonna get worse.

p.s. Ozzy's new album, Down To Earth, is NOW in stores.
Do yourself a favor - give the Ozzman your $17 cuz you'll thanks me later.

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