Hello again mofos and once again, may I welcome you to the house of pain! The following opinions are just that - opinions - and in no way are they meant to try to persuade any of you to change musical tastes - even those who for some reason think the words "dance music" don't make up the oxymoron of all oxymorons. I am now going to list, in my opinion, what I believe to be the top 10 albums ever recorded. If you don't agree then that's all good cuz hey, if we all agreed
this world would be a pretty fucking boring place now wouldn't it?
10. ReadySexGo - Mravelous 3 > The best band you never heard of and the best album you've never heard. Butch Walker, the singer/songwriter, has been toiling in the biz for over ten years and has kept the core band together. He's had it go from a 5 piece to a 4 piece to a 3 piece band, so he changed the name each time. I have never heard a bad Butch Walker song, and this album has gems from top to bottom.
9. Dirt - Alice In Chains > It's no secret that I enjoy grunge music about as much as I enjoy getting sodomized by elephants, but credit where it's due - this is a dandy album. The only reason I like Alice In Chains at all is cuz they weren't too heavy on the whining, but they were more into the Sabbath dementia thing. The dual vox and Jerry Cantrell's guitars make Alice In Chains enjoyable, and this is their finest effort.
8. Badmotorfinger - Soundgarden > Again, not a big fan of the grunge, but Chris Cornellis the greatest singer in rock n roll history, and a pretty dman good songwriter. I dare any of you to say that, when you heard Jesus Christ Pose for the very first time, that you didn't get a sick, butterfly feeling when he jumps in screaming the first verse. This guy peels fucking paint with his voice. Chris Cornell is a rock god, and Soudgarden is one of rock's greatest bands ever.
7. No Rest For The Wicked - Ozzy Osbourne > There are some of you who may think I'm nuts for this. Some of you will say "if you're gonna pick Ozzy solo, it's gotta be blizzard of Oz" but let's get real - Blizzard had 3, maybe 4 good songs on it. Crazy Train is an anthem that gives that album attention, but it's not that great an album. No Rest For The Wicked is his best album. Every song on it is great, and that is the album he unleashed a 19 year old Zakk Wylde on the unsuspecting world. Some of the shit he pulls off is amazing.
6. Back In Black - ACDC > I'm not an overly huge fan of these guys but this album is awesome. 21 years later and not only has this album stood the test of time with a few songs that get regular play, but I have yet to meet a person who asked to turn the album off while listening to it at parties. Every single song on the album is an ass kicker.
5. Master Of Puppets - Metallica > Although these guys have turned into greedy pigs who are so desperate to win fans back that they have recruited the man that made them what they are - Dave Mustaine - and the fact that that troll that sits behind the drums couldn't keep the beat if he was a foot patrol cop, this album would count as what some call a masterpiece. Mind you, this was their last great album, cuz they ran outta Mustaine riffs to use, and Cliff Burton died, but this album serves a great reminder as to how great Metallica WERE until they got possesed by the ghost of Benjamin Franklin.
4. Houses Of The Holy - Led Zeppelin > I'm guessing that if you asked 100 people what they think the best Zeppelin album is, 98 of them would say Led Zeppelin IV, and that's cuz Stairway To Heaven is probably the only Zep song they know. But, I feel safe in saying there's one other person on this list that I know for sure will agree with me on Houses being Zep's best album. Jimmy page and Bonzo were at their best on this one, and even John Paul came to the table for real, and of course, Robert delivers as always.
3. Motley Crue 94 - Motley Crue > Go ahead and whine that it doesn't  count as Motley Crue since there's no Vince Neil on it, but here are the facts - Vince Neil had writing credits on about 12 songs in the bands career, and that was probably cuz he added a "whoo hoo" here or a "yeah" there. Basically, he was hired to sing Nikki Sixx, Tommy Lee and Mick Mars' songs. So, John Corabi was hired to do the same, except John co-wrote every song and lyric, AND played rhythm guitar. So basically, you take a great band, remove it's weakest link, and replace it with a much, much stronger link, and you get a masterpiece of an album. Unfortunately, all the narrow minded morons, and Dr Feelgood band-wagon hoppers wouldn't accept it as Motley Crue, and this album got swept under the rug. Tragic
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