Main players

 Name  :  Lucy Hunt

Position :  Hotel staff

Character :  Happy go lucky airhead , completely devoid of any common sense

Catchphrase :  OOOOOOOOOhhhhhhhh !!!!!!!

 Name  :  Oliver Purvis

Position :  Hotel staff

Character :  Incurable romantic , caught in love triangle concerning Lucy Hunt and  mad Jamesey Wallace . Highly erratic mood swings between 4 and 6 pm make it worth giving Ollie a wide berth during this time . Ollie is pictured here dreaming up poetry for his belle , Sina the bootiful .

Catchphrase : Im not doing her again !!!

 Name  :   Neil Mc Grory

Position :  Resort representative

Character :  . Lazy Bastard pictured here in one of his more active stages . Estimated calorie burning rate = 3 per day .Chronic masturbation , makes his bedsheets like breadboards , ditto messrs Purvis and Wallace his room mates who have the same habit.

Catchphrase : Any fanny about , lads ?

 Name  :   Mad Jamesey Wallace

Position :  69

Character :  . Quiet , well mannered kid by day , but due to a low alcohol tolerance , two shandies transform this meek mannered  boy into "Mad Jamesey Wallace", The Caiparina Kid . Fuelled by a barrage of designer drinks , this fanny ferret can rave all night and wlll try and shag anything that moves . If it does not move , he will shag it till it does . Jamesey is believed to be heavily influenced by the drunken exploits of partners in crime , Ollie Purvis and  Neil Mc Grory .

Closely linked to Lucy Hunt with whom he shares many points in common

Catchphrase : Of course I love you , now put it back in your mouth.  .

 Name  :   Swiss Toni

Position :  360 degree scissor kick

Character :  Local ski bum , under the guise of  ski representative . Toni is only beaten for doing less work by the infamous Alicia from Thomson Holidays who puts in a respectable one hour per week . As well as being a very competent skier , Toni also excels at necking pints and is an award winning Rizla roller .

Catchphrase :  Lets nail this badger .

 Name  :  Gordon Campbell

Position :  Chef

Character :  Easy going character , driven close to having a nervous breakdown due to super  incompetent waitress staff .

Catchphrase: : Get this fucking food out .

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