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Single people do throw the best parties. There's always a good chance somebody's coming out of their clothes before the night's out. Most of the time it's the woman who's dancing by herself way too early in the evening. "It's only 7:15 and Sally's dancing by herself. That shirt's coming off tonight, I guarantee you."
Single people don't consider it a good party unless the police have been there at least a dozen times. When they arrive it's the same scenario every time: 400 drunks trying to act like they're not drunk. One guy is the spokesman for the group.
No one ever went home from those parties. They just slept where they fell. When you got up the next day, it'd look like a war-zone. You'd try to wake up people you'd never met before.
I once went to a toga party from which I walked home naked. Thank goodness it was only two blocks from the apartment. I'm still trying to figure out where I had the key. If you know, please don't tell me.
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